not breathing

I ignored his grunts, the only thing in my mind at this point was to go get him back to the clinic so that they could do something.

“s…sam” he called

“save your strength,” i said, trying to speak with a clear voice. “why would you give up the last of your powers to do something as a protection spell for me? I told you” i said, wiping the tears from my eyes as much as i could while i ran like my life depended on it.

“i have limited time to live without a beating heart and taking back to the castle is going to be nothing but a waste of time, so please, just lay me down and let me savour this moment with you”

“no!!” i said, my throat burning as i spoke, i cannot give up just..

“Sam.. p..pl…ease… don…t fig…ht me… on th…” he gave out a feat of cough, coughing out blood in the process letting blood splash at the side of my face.

I let him down slowly, bitting my lips. As i looked at him.

“what…” i took in a deep breath, trying to keep calm. “i tried to keep you away, it was not…” i felt myself choke on my tears,

“it… “ he took in a deep breath. You could see it, he was paler than anything i had ever seen, and that said a lot because i had seen him very pale in the laast few days. “is fine” he said, reaching out to me “it was….” he squeezed my hands as though drawing strength from it. “either this way or another way, at least it is not as scary.”

I threw my head back, trying to take in the tears that threateand to fall.

“your mum said something about using me to heal you.., what is… what way?” i looked at him, ready to do anything” he shook hos head no.

“i lovwe you” he said, his grip on me weakening.

“if you leave me, i would never forgive you” i said, as my eyes got blur. I did not want to wipe away my tears as that would mean that i would have to let go of his hands.

He said nothing but i could see that he was still breathing, although that did little to bring down my panicked mind. “i love you too” i said, as though that was going to make anything better, “i did not mean it, when i said, i wanted to meet Eric, i just… it was shitty of me to do but i wanted it to be a trigger so that you get worked up and told me what it was you were hiding and….” his hands went limb in mine.

I looked at him with parted lips, looking at the body in the darkness. His hair was no longer brown, they had faded into white, and his eyes. They were no longer as vibrant, as before.

“Andrew” i called moving him as though i was trying to wake him up. "there was no response, causing me to… i did not know what to say, or put exactly into words how i felt.

“this is all my fault” i thought, looking at the lifeless body that laid beside me. “Andrew, please wake up, i swear i would be better, i would… i just…” words did not seem to be coming to my mind at the moment.

“Andrew please, lets go home…” the tears were running through like a damn had just been burst open.

It was as though my body took a minute before i could fully process it.

“he is gone” i said to no other person than myself. I threw him over my shoulders, running as fast as i could back to the castle.

**

“open the gates” i yelled, ,my voice sounding, in that moment, like i was ready for war…

The door opened, with the guards looking at me for a moment before they took him off of me. I wanted to drop to my knees but i couldn’t i needed to keep him in my sight.

I needed to be the first person he opened his eyes to.

They dropped him as gently as they could on the clinic bed, with the doctor rushing in, looking distraught.

“what happ-” it took him a while to take in the sight in front of him before his knees buckled. Before he could say any other thing both the queen and the maid, susan entered, looking at the body in shock for a while.

“my son” the queen said, looking at him with wide eyes.

She looked at him for a moment, not moving and i was not even sure she was breathing before she turned to look at me. “three days, that is all i am giving you to pack your things and leave.” she said, looking at me with a void in her eyes before she left.

“can he…” i said, after i was sure that the queen was gone. “can he be revived?” i knew the answer to that, but i was not help but think that maybe.. there was a second way.

The doctor said nothing, still looking at the dead body in front of him.

“come with me” the maid said, looking at me with a strange look and putting her hands on me firmly.

I did not move. I could not say anything but it was obvious that i was not moving any time soon.

“i need to show you something” i looked back to the body, my tears long dried as my body was weak. I nodded.

She led me back to the room, well the door of our room before she… slapped me.

I held my cheeks in surorise more than pain because as of the moment, i did not think my body was capable of processing pain. “i told you to take care of him” she said, breaking down in to tears before she shifted.

“Reandel?” i called looking at the broken man in front of me…