Chapter 53
I fell asleep in his arms feeling secure. This is all I wanted and more and there is nothing in the world that I want more than to feel like I was enough. Forgiveness goes a long way and honestly, he has shown he has grown up. I was wrapped in his arms, and I felt safe because I was safe with him. I haven’t slept this well in a long time. A sudden pain struck my stomach as I woke up clutching my stomach. I cried in pain as it was getting worse. I pushed on Alizac to wake up which he did frantically.
“What’s wrong?” He asked.
I pulled the covers from my legs and right before my eyes something terrible happened. Nothing was ever easy or perfect. My entire world shattered because I knew what this way without needing someone to tell me.
“I am miscarrying.” I whispered.
I got up from the bed with Alizac holding me along as I went into the bathroom and sat on the toilet and just pushed. Clumps of blood came out and tissue came out of me. I cried. Like my heart had so much heartbreak and as soon as I found stability it was taken from me. Alizac helped undress me and put me in some of his clothes. He reached for a rag and placed it down like a pad for me while I fell apart some more. Then he wrapped me in his arms bridal style and carried me out. I knew he was taking me to the hospital just to confirm it. He was such a trooper and man I wish he knew exactly how grateful I was for him at that moment. What have I done to deserve this?
The doctor didn’t even have to tell me I knew. I knew the moment the first pain came that it was too good to be true and I was so attached. I just remember staring at him but there was this loud ringing in my ears, and I couldn’t hear his words. But I read his lips. “I’m sorry.”
Alizac held onto me while I just kind of died at that moment. I don’t care what happens to me anymore but if you ask then I am fine. Everything is fine. Morning came and the door opened. I didn’t sleep a second. Persephone was at the door and as soon as I saw her sad look I broke. Alizac woke up to me sobbing and looked at her.
“It’s okay, I have her,” she said.
He placed a kiss on my cheek and got up to leave. Persephone had walked over and wrapped me in her arms while I screamed. I cursed the world for hating me so much. I was a trail of despair, and I didn’t want to do it anymore. What if all along I was the problem? That I was cursed with bad luck because nothing is going right lately. Between the humans, the gods, the me dying, and now losing my kids there was no time for happiness so why should I ever try. That same night I was released home and I just hid in my room. The once fluttering I felt in my stomach was gone and now, I don’t need to expect anything. I know everyone was trying to be supportive, but I didn’t want to hear it.
***
JAX:
We got word that Ryleigh lost her twins and you could see she was trying to hide but we saw how devastated she was. I wanted to be that person for her, but she had made it clear she wanted nothing to do with me and how she felt about Alizac. She avoided me any chance she got but all I saw was self-destruction when she was spending every night drinking to the point Alizac had to pick her up from the floor. I just watch from afar when they’d argue outside about her rebellious behavior. Sadly, I just had to sit back and watch it unfold because he’d never give up on her. I hated that about it all. I once again came to the bar just to have a drink in private and maybe find someone to distract me from the night. It wasn’t long before Ryleigh came in. I’d never seen her dress so proactively before, but she had a short dress that only covered half her ass and some long heels on. Not to mention she had make-up on. Ryleigh had always had natural beauty and she knew that.
“I need two shots of tequila, thank you.” She ordered.
She went back to looking at her phone before she realized I was next to her. She stood there uncomfortably before she reached in her purse to grab her wallet.
“Drinks are on me.” I told the bartender.
I tapped the stool next to me, so she’d sit next to me. I wasn’t trying anything, but I do hate the way she was acting. She hesitantly sat down and looked the other way. That’s when I noticed she was sober for the first time and her eyes were red.
“I can pay for my own drink, you know?”
The bartender set down the shot glasses that were rimmed with salt and also a life on the corner of it. She picked both of them up and passed one to me. Just like that, we clinked the glasses before taking the burning tequila back.
“I know you can, but I want to. If you’re going to get drunk at least you’ll have someone to take care of you. No expectations, just a friend.”
Her body language relaxed before holding two fingers up to order more. I had a high tolerance, but she had an intake tolerance that I couldn’t keep up. We didn’t talk as much until it began to start hitting her. I let Alizac know she’s safe with me, but he didn’t respond to me.