Chapter 102 Grieve {Rosie}

Chapter 102 Grieve {Rosie}
I was once again locked in a basement. 

But this time, it had a bit of improvement. I stood in front of what used to be an abandoned rusty basement with a leaking pipe with handcuffs around my wrists.

“The moment I confirmed you were alive and well, I immediately ordered a little revamp of your old room.” Berlo's mocking voice followed me to the entrance of the stairs down the dark basement.

“I hope you like it.” I could just sense the grin in his words. He moved behind me and it startled me. I heard a click then the basement brightened.

Goosebumps covered my skin. He was right, he did make some improvements. The pipes were not leaking, there was a black metal shelving unit with cereals and beverages stacked on it and the greatest improvement to my old basement was the bed.

Filthy and stained mattress laid in the center of the basement. There was no pillow or bedsheets in sight. I knew better than to ask for some.

At least I wouldn’t be sleeping on the cold concrete floor like I did last time. 

Berlo nudged me forward. I stumbled but caught myself before I toppled down the concrete steps.

“Why don’t you get comfortable, rest a little.” He gave me another nudge so I took it as a sign to walk down the stairs. I felt dizzy, the smell of wet metal and cement made me nauseous.

“Don’t get too excited. After your rest, we’ll start our elaborate plan which I’m sure you will very much enjoy.” 

The nausea hit with full force when I dropped down the last step and my barefeet touched the cold floor.

“And, Rosie?”

I turned and looked up at him. From where he stood, he was shrouded in darkness, his face dark and dangerous.

“If you try to pull any stupid move in here, you will be caught. There are cameras in and out of this basement and I have doubled my guards around this mansion. Especially out of this basement.” He warned, his voice low.

“If you escape out of this basement, I will find you and when I do, I will stop playing nice with you.” With that he left and slammed the door behind him.

I released a sigh as I dragged my feet across the floor. My knees gave out right as I reached the mattress. I dropped to the foot of the large sized bed.

“Back in my cell.” I whispered, my voice cracked hoarse and cracked. I looked down at the stained mattress and swallowed as my breathing wavered. 

Exhaustion weighed heavy on my bones, my own skin felt uncomfortable and itchy. This was it. Five years of running and pretending only to end back here. 

I should have killed myself when I had the chance. If Granny hadn’t stop me, I wouldn’t have to suffer like this. 

My chest quivered. My lips trembled. I can’t do this anymore. I just…I just can’t.

“You’ll make a beautiful bride my, Rosie.” 

My mind began to torture me with memories of my mother. Memories I had locked away from the moment I fled Italy. 

The last time I saw her was on the night before my wedding day. It was long and hectic. I was everywhere, the saloon, the spa, the mall and when I sat in front of my vanity and remembered who I was getting married to, I broke down in tears.

She came in to comfort me. She told me it was the wedding jitters. She claimed she felt the same when she was getting married to my father. 

I tried to tell Mama, I tried to tell her how horrible Berlo was but she didn’t listen. She believed Berlo over me. They all did. He told them I was cheating on him with some stranger.

“Love isn’t the basis for marriage in our world, my dear.” She said so softly, it almost made sense. 

“Then what is?”

“For us women, it’s protection and stability.”

“But papa has that covered, mama. I don’t need Berlo to do that for me.” I argued innocently.

Mama smiled sadly. “Not for long, Rosie. When his sons take over, we’ll be cast aside for vengeous beasts to feed on.”

I shook my head solemnly. “The greater beast is Berlo mama. Please mama, don’t make me do this.”

Instead of providing me with the assurance I needed, she hugged me tightly. I was taken by surprise. Mama stopped showing me affection long ago since my father started treating her poorly for not granting him a male heir so when she hugged me, it filled me with a warmth I didn’t know I needed. 

“You know I am powerless, Rosie. There’s nothing I can do my dear but hope you don’t turn into me.”

I hugged her back tightly despite the anger I felt from her confession. She was the only one offering comfort and deep down she was right. It wasn’t her fault, she was thrown into this just as I was.

I didn’t know she was sick. I was too busy being mad at her for being powerless and too weak to fight for freedom that I didn’t know how fragile her heart was.

The worst feeling was knowing I wouldn't change my mind about fleeing even if I did know. I was so selfish. So fucking selfish and now she’s gone and didn’t even get to say goodbye.

“Mama, no.” I sobbed, my shoulders quaked under the pressure. The basement echoed of my wails and sobs. My chest burned like it was on fire. 

“I’m…I’m so sorry.” My chest seized, breaths coming too fast, too shallow. Each inhale I took stuttered and each exhale broke into a sob that tore straight out of me. 

My lungs burned, my throat ached. I was gasping like my body had forgotten how to breathe. Tears blurred my vision, my hands shook as I raised them to cover my face. Absentmindedly, my body rocked back and forth.

“I’m so-so-so sorry.”

After a while, I quieted but it was because my chest had hurt so much it had become painfully numb. My eyes stared ahead, unblinking. My crying didn’t bring relief like they used to. It only made me feel empty.

I wanted to end it all. All of these would not matter if I died. I would no longer feel pain, guilt or hatred.

My eyes spotted a pair of scissors on the top of the metal shelve. I had my chance.