Chapter 47 Anya
A week had passed since I accepted Alexei's offer. Since I chose my brother over Nikolai.
Seven days of comfort and safety. Of everything I could possibly want.
But throughout those seven nights, I cried myself to sleep.
Everything here was perfect. Too perfect even. It felt like I was in a beautiful prison.
I ate dinner with Dmitri every evening. We sat at a long table in a gorgeous dining room with crystal chandeliers hanging from high ceilings, fine china and food fit for royalty.
My brother would talk about his day. About the books he was reading. About the things Alexei had taught him.
He was happy. Truly happy. His eyes sparkled when he laughed. His smile was genuine.
And I was grateful. So grateful that he was alive. That he was healthy and safe.
I could see him anytime I wanted. We would walk in the gardens together, play chess and talk for hours.
And thankfully, Alexei kept a meaningful distance. He was polite and respectful. He only spoke to me when necessary.
He never pushed.
He never demanded anything.
He never forced himself into my space.
And I was grateful for that. It made my stay here even more easy.
There was no Katya here to treat me like a slave. No servants to mock me. No maids to whisper behind my back.
Everyone treated me with respect. They treated me like I was important.
I was important.
I was Alexei's guest. His prized possession.
The room they gave me was beautiful. Larger than any room I had ever stayed in. Even larger than the one at Nikolai's estate.
It had silk sheets, soft pillows and a bed so comfortable it felt like sleeping on clouds.
But I could not sleep.
Because every night, I dreamed of Nikolai.
I dreamed of his gray eyes filled with pain. I dreamed of him calling my name. Screaming for me.
I would wake up gasping with tears on my face.
And during the day, I would hallucinate. I would feel his hands wrapped around my waist. I would smell his cologne and hear his voice whispering in my ear.
"Anya. Come back to me, please."
I cried in bed every night. Th pillows muffled my sobs so no one would hear.
"I am sorry," I would whisper into the darkness. "I am so sorry, Nikolai. Please forgive me."
I was selfish. I knew it. I had chosen my brother over him. I had chosen my own happiness over his needs.
But what else could I do? Dmitri was my blood. My family. The only person left who shared my name.
Still, the guilt ate at me. It consumed me from the inside out.
Dmitri noticed. Of course he did. We had always been close. He could read me like a book.
"Anya, are you okay?" He asked one day during lunch. "You seem distracted. Your eyes are sad."
"I am fine," I lied, forcing a smile that didn't reach my eyes. "I'm just tired."
"You zone out a lot. Like you are somewhere else. Thinking about something… or someone."
My heart clenched. "It is nothing. I'm serious, Dmitri."
"You can talk to me. You know that, right? I am your brother. I am here for you." He said gently. He looked really worried.
"I know." I reached across the table and squeezed his hand. "I am just happy to have you back. That's all."
He did not look convinced. But he did not push. He just squeezed my hand back and smiled.
I could not tell him the truth. How could I tell him that I had fallen in love with our father's murderer. The man who destroyed our lives.
He would hate me. He would look at me with disgust. He would never understand.
So I kept it buried, letting it fester inside me.
Alexei called me one night and said he wanted to throw a party.
"To celebrate your reunion," he said, smiling. "You and your brother are together again after four years. It deserves to be commemorated."
I nodded. What could I say?
He threw an elaborate party.
But he did not invite anyone outside his estate. No other families. No business partners. No allies. Just him, his household, me and Dmitri.
It was strange. Almost like a family gathering.
There was music, dancing, expensive food and wine.
Dmitri was excited. He laughed. He danced with me. He looked happier than I had ever seen him.
"Thank you for being here," he whispered as we danced. "Thank you for not giving up on me."
Tears filled my eyes. "I will never give up on you. Never."
Alexei watched from the sidelines. He did not dance. He did not join the festivities, he just watched with those calculating blue eyes.
I caught him staring at me several times. His expression was unreadable.
Was this all part of his plan? To make me comfortable? To make me trust him?
Or was there something else?
I did not know. I didn't even want to think about it.
The party lasted for hours. We laughed. We played games. We ate and drank until we were stuffed.
For a few hours, I almost forgot. Almost let myself believe that this was my life now. That this was okay.
But then the party ended. The music stopped. The servants started cleaning up.
"I am exhausted," Dmitri yawned. "I am going to bed. Goodnight, Anya."
"Goodnight." I hugged him tight. "Sweet dreams."
He left. Alexei had also disappeared somewhere. I didn't see him anywhere
He had probably retired to his room room.
I walked to my room slowly. My feet hurt from dancing in heels. My face hurt from too much laughing.
I was tired. So tired. My body ached. Everywhere ached.
All I wanted was to collapse into bed, close my eyes and escape into dreams.
Even if those dreams were filled with Nikolai's face.
I opened the door to my room, dragged myself in and reached for the light switch.
The lights flickered on.
And I froze.
Sitting casually on my bed, was Alexei.
He was barely dressed.
He was wearing just loose pants with no shirt.
His silver hair was down, flowing over his bare shoulders.
He held a glass of wine and sipped it slowly.
His eyes locked on me.
"What are you doing here, Alexei?" I asked. My heart started racing.
He smiled, slowly. His eyes glinting with something I couldn't name.
"I am sleeping here tonight, Anya." He said simply.