"Hey, Sam, take it easy. You’re drinking too much." Caleb's voice was soft but had a lace of worry in it that sounded weird to me.
I simply smiled and nodded while letting the hot liquid sliding through my throat continue just what it was doing to my body at that moment..it was what I wanted and I was loving it.
Five-star hotel, classy bar, low chatter.. this wasn’t the place for getting wasted. But here I was.
I knew I was drinking too much, yeah, but I didn’t care. Not tonight.
Tonight, I was going to let it all go behind.. I wouldn't think of anything else, just me and me alone.. that's the whole point of the celebration in the first place.
I stared at the half-empty glass in front of me, swirling the liquid before taking another sip.
Without pausing, I lifted the bottle of vodka in front of me and refilled my glass.. I was about to down it in one gulp again when Caleb stopped me, firmly holding my hands.
“Hey Sam, are you okay?” He asked, taking the glass from me. “You shouldn't drink like this, you're a woman.. What's wrong? Is anything the matter? You don't look like your usual vibrant self.”
I pulled my hands from his grip running it through my hair.. my head was pounding so hard like a mortar striking a pestle.. Yes, I had said I wasn't going to think of anything else but these thoughts wouldn't just leave.. these memories I have been trying so hard to bury.
To think that I ran into Tyler again, it felt like those painful things happened all over again. I thought I was healed . At least, to an extent but.. seeing him again, I… I don't know.
“I’m fine,” I mumbled, and even to me, the words sounded slurred.
Tyler.
Fuck him.
I felt the words slip out before I could stop them. “Fuck him.”
Caleb looked at me, confused, his eyebrows drawing together.
“What? Who?”
I quickly shifted my gaze.. I should hold back.. Sam please hold back but I couldn't.. I literally lost control over my mouth.
“I thought I could forget, y’know? Just...move on. But no. He’s still there, in my head, like a fucking ghost.” My voice cracked, the alcohol making my emotions raw, too close to the surface.
Caleb shifted in his seat, clearly unsure of what to do with my drunken ramblings.
His hand hovered over the glass in front of him, as if he wanted to take another drink but thought better of it.
“Sam...maybe we should call it a night. You’re…”
“No!” I snapped, my voice louder than I intended. Heads turned, and I suddenly felt the weight of the stares around us.
People were watching, their eyes curious, judgmental. But I didn’t care. Not anymore. Not tonight.
I turned to Caleb, my vision blurring slightly as I tried to focus on him.
“Why do you do this to me?” I asked, my voice softer now, laced with frustration. “You’re so...different. One minute, you’re this caring guy, making me feel like maybe I’m not so broken. And then the next, you’re distant. Cold. It’s like...I don’t know what to expect from you.”
Caleb blinked, clearly taken aback by my outburst. His lips parted as if he wanted to say something, but no words came out.
He looked...embarrassed. Maybe it was because of the people around us, or maybe because he wasn’t used to seeing me like this…. drunk, emotional, vulnerable.
“Sam, I… ”
“I shouldn’t even be doing this,” I interrupted, running a hand through my hair again in frustration. “I shouldn’t be feeling...whatever this is. It’s too soon, it’s all wrong. But I can’t stop it. You…,” I stopped, biting my lip, trying to keep myself from saying too much. But the alcohol had already loosened my tongue. “You make me feel things I don’t want to feel.”
Caleb’s face softened, and for a moment, I saw a flicker of something in his eyes.. guilt? Understanding? I wasn’t sure.
But before I could read too much into it, he stood up, pulling out his wallet.
“I’m getting you home,” he said quietly, avoiding my gaze as he threw down some bills for the drinks. “Come on.”
I opened my mouth to protest, but my body had other ideas.
The room was starting to tilt, and I had to grab the edge of the bar to steady myself.
Caleb was already beside me, slipping an arm around my waist.
“We’re leaving,” he murmured, his voice firm but gentle.
I didn’t fight him. I let him guide me out of the bar, the cool night air hitting my face like a slap. My legs wobbled as we made our way to his car, and by the time we reached it, I was barely standing.
“I’ve got you,” Caleb said softly, bending down to hoist me up onto his back.
I felt the warmth of his body as he lifted me, his strong arms holding me steady as he carried me to the car. My head rested against his shoulder, my thoughts spinning, my heart pounding.
The drive home was a blur.
I was barely conscious, drifting in and out of the haze, but I remember the feeling of Caleb’s hand on mine, the warmth of his touch grounding me.
When we finally got to my place, I stumbled out of the car, feeling the world spin around me. Caleb was at my side, his hand on my arm, steadying me and lifted me up and carried me into my apartment.
And then it happened.
I threw up. All over his shirt.
“Oh my God,” I gasped, sincerely sorry as I doubled over, the alcohol finally catching up to me.
Caleb didn’t even flinch. He just sighed, pulling off his shirt and tossing it aside.
“Don’t worry about it,” he said, his voice surprisingly calm.
I looked up at him, and my breath caught in my throat.
His bare chest, his abs, the way the moonlight cast shadows on his skin… it was all too much.
My head was still spinning, but now for a completely different reason.
Without thinking, I reached out, my fingers brushing against his skin. He stiffened at the touch, his eyes locking onto mine.
For a moment, neither of us moved, the tension between us crackling like electricity.
“Sam…” he whispered, his voice rough.
I didn’t answer. I couldn’t.
The only thing I could focus on was the heat between us, the way his body felt under my fingertips. And then, without warning, we collided.
His lips crashed against mine, hard and desperate, and I kissed him back with everything I had.
My hands found their way to his chest, to the curve of his shoulders, pulling him closer. I felt him everywhere.. his breath, his touch, the way his body pressed against mine.
I didn’t stop him when he reached for the hem of my dress, didn’t stop him when I felt it sliding up my thighs.
I didn’t want to stop. Not anymore. I let myself go, let myself drown in him, in this moment.
There was no past. No Tyler. No pain.
Just Caleb.
And I didn’t want it to end.