Chapter 30-2

"Do you have love now?" It was an interesting question.  "I do.  I have friends I love like a family, and I see my mum more often now.  I'm still working on my sister, but that's okay." "What about that guy in the corridor?" Ali didn't hesitate.  "Yes.  I love him and he loves me.  The only problem is me and my many, many issues." "Get over yourself," he said pleasantly.  "Don't mess up again for a different reason, yeah?  If it helps, I forgive you, Lexi.  I forgave you a long time ago.  We were young and emotional and the stakes seemed so high.  I'm at least a bit wiser now, and I would hate to think of you living the rest of your days as a sad bag lady because you can't forgive yourself.  If you're not going to make the same mistakes again, you deserve another chance to be happy, okay?" It was so Otis, and so what she needed to hear.  Dropping her head onto her knees, she wept, tears of total release and redemption.  She felt Otis drape an arm over her shoulders, a friendly weight, giving her permission to cry harder and let it all out, years of guilt and weight crumbling off her. They stayed like that for a long while, and eventually the sky began to brighten before them, the first slither of sun appearing over the ocean.  Ali looked up and smiled to see the fresh dawn, filled with hope and promise.  "It's going to be a good day, I think." "Every day is a good day if you decide it is," said Otis.  He stood and pulled her to her feet.  "I'm starving.  Breaky?" "Gosh, eating with Odin Caldwell?"  She fanned herself and grinned.  "It would be my honor." "Don't knock my stage name, thanks.  People have often said I look like a Norse god." "What people?" "People.  My dentist." "Well, we shouldn't argue with a medical professional..." The bantered as they left the beach and found a café open for the early birds.  By the time they'd filled up on plates of bacon, eggs, baked beans and hash browns, Ali realised that despite the years and the history, she and Otis were still friends.  Not lovers, there weren't any romantic feelings left; they'd both grown so much.  But being true friends - it felt amazing, as if she'd been captive inside a stone prison and now she was flying under an open sky again. When the food was gone, the coffee drunk, the stories shared and all sins forgiven, Otis stretched his arms high.  "Oof!  That was great, but I should really get going.  The band and me are driving up to Coffs Harbour today, got a few gigs there next week." They swapped email addresses.  Ali said, "Hey, let me know if you're ever down in Sydney.  Or if you want to play Bateman's Bay, I have an in with the pub there." "Cool beans."  They reached a corner where he was going one way, and she another.  Otis said, "Come here, you."  He hugged her hard.  "I'm glad we finally got to have this chat.  Remember what I said, okay?  No more being sad and stupid about what the old Lexi stuffed up.  Go be happy, yeah?" "Yeah."  For the first time in her life, Ali felt her heart open, unguarded and hopeful.  "Thank you, Otis." He pulled back and gave her a bright and glorious Otis smile, and there, she saw that she hadn't ruined him after all.  The gorgeous young man was still there, and she didn't have to grieve for him anymore. "'Bye, Lex." "'Bye, Otis." They parted, but this time with good will stretching between them even as the distance grew. *** By the time Ali reached Thomas' apartment, she was practically vibrating with excitement.  There was so much to tell him, but the most important being that she loved him, and that she finally felt like she was on the road to healing. On the road outside the building, a man stood by a dark sedan, and he seemed to eye her as she passed.  A cloud sailed over her morning as she felt unease unfurl down her spine.  Pesky paranoia.  That guy wasn't looking at me, and he definitely wasn't going to try and kidnap me and throw me into his big car and sell me on the sex slave market. Stop it! she ordered her brain.  This was just a by-product of having her Otis-guilt alleviated.  Naturally, now her biggest fear was gone, her brain was trying to invent new things to worry about.  Stuffing the suspicion back down inside her, she resumed her smiling and headed inside. The door of the apartment was cracked open and she scooted inside.  "Thomas?  Hello?" The apartment was almost supernaturally clean; every surface had been wiped, the bed was freshly sheeted and the bathroom was empty.  Feeling the bad feelings regurgitating, Ali looked all around.  "Hi?  Thomas?" A lovely woman with a pale face appeared from around the corner of the lounge.  "Room not ready yet," she said in cracked English.  Ali struggled to understand the accent as she said, "You check in after two, yes?  Not ready." "No, no, I'm staying here.  My boyfriend has been here for weeks."  Ali tried to act out the words, seeing the confusion on the other woman's face.  "Thomas Walsh?" "Thomas?  Yes!" "Ah, good."  Finally. "Thomas gone.  All gone." "What?" The cleaning lady hustled over to the cupboards and showed Ali the empty interior.  "Thomas gone." "No..."  Ali felt like screaming.  This can't be happening!  Not now!  Not when she'd finally started to heal, when she could be with him the way they were meant to be together. Why did he leave?  That probably wasn't a big mystery; after all, any man who found out he didn't even know his girlfriend's real name and then waited around all night for her to come home after watching her swan off with her ex-boyfriend would be pissed. "Thank you," she murmured to the cleaning lady and fled the room. "Miss?  Miss!" Ali hurtled downstairs.  The man standing beside his car straightened up as she burst through the doors.  He reached for her arm.  "Hey, excuse me?" "No!"  Ali tore away, sprinting down the street.  Sorry, Mr Sex-slave.  I don't have time for your interference. The man I love might be slipping away. Well, not this time.  There had been enough running and enough heartbreak in her life and she was done with it.  I don't care if he's upset.  We are worth fighting for. Feeling strong and powerful, Ali let her feet carry her to the train station where she booked a ticket on the first train to Sydney.