"...she is better than you."

"...she is better than you."
Chase stirred on his bed, his eyes wide open, staring at the darkness. His nights had been nothing short of deep loneliness and absolute consciousness for months. It was unclear when this started, all he could recall was an inability to keep his eyes closed one night.
And after that night, it became a normalcy for him. 
Nights like this, he remembered Dali’s words, asking him if he stayed awake due to the nightmares haunting him. 
How could he have told her then that ever since she left him, he had not been able to find the peace to sleep? He wished it was nightmares, he wished he could get two hours of sleep at most, but he had been subjected to nights of complete and utter consciousness.
Peace was far from him.
Perhaps that was the consequence of his actions. That was what being a terrible person got him.
He sat up on the bed, leaning against the bed frame as his eyes found the window. The night was as beautiful as always, stars painting the sky like destinies woven. 
In the calmness of the darkness, Chase wondered if the strands of his destiny were connected to Dali’s.
Then the voice came.
Dali’s voice, breaking through the silence. His eyebrows knitted into a frown. He had picked up from the conversation he had with her that she too was plagued with sleepless nights and nightmares, but suddenly finding her way outside in the open like this was unusual.
Out of curiosity, he climbed down from the bed and walked to the window. 
Dali stood under the stars, a ball of fire sitting in her palms, surrounded by more than ten people with skin ashen white. They stood tall, fierce, and carried the smell of death with them.
Vampires.
His heartbeat quickened. They found them.
“Fuck!”
Chase turned around, his back at the window. 
“What is it?” Damon asked from beside him. He had been stirred awake from the noise.
“Vampires,” Chase whispered.
Damon jumped to his feet that second. He rushed to the window where Chase stood. He watched Dali and the vampires battle in the night, flames burning from her hands and turning the vampires to ashes.
He scoffed, impressed. “She really is good at what she does,” he said.
Meanwhile, Chase stood there, unable to move. At that second, all he could remember was the time he had Dali sent to the dungeon when he found out she was a vampire.
What he recalled was seeing the wound on her disappear. What he recalled was handing her a jagged piece of the broken vase, demanding she tear open her skin.
What he recalled was the fear in her eyes, the sheer thought of betraying him messing with her head.
And here she stood, fighting against a number of vampires to keep him safe. 
Did he deserve that?
No, he didn’t. 
The time he had slapped her across the face, tearing her cheek open with his claws, the time his guard unintentionally stabbed her with his claws—she fell to her feet, begging him to help her, but all he did was turn his back away because he could not stand the betrayal. 
When all she did wrong was try to save a number of innocent witches.
Why was she defending him? Why was she protecting him?
He had heard her words. 
“Why should I hand to you what belongs to me?”
Those were her words. She stood by him, risking her life to save him. 
“Do you think we should join her?” Damon asked, watching from the window.
Chase froze. 
He should go out there to defend her. He should be out there, accompanying her as she defends him. Sitting here in the room, watching this from the window, he was nothing but a loser.
Damon turned over to look at him. Seeing as there was no form of movement from his side, Damon kept his mouth shut. He wouldn’t even go out there if he was paid to. 
The door to their hut suddenly flung open. Alexa barged into the room, and the first thing she did was pull Damon from the window and slam him against the wall. 
Behind her, Marisol, Kiara, and Celyn walked in. 
“So you know what’s happening out there but you kept still? You stood by watching as Dali defends you?” Alexa barked at his face.
“She gave you shelter, gave you food, saved your life, and all you could do to repay her is hide out in your room knowing you are her only form of company during this time?”
Chase shuddered. “Alex…”
He couldn’t complete the word before a bright light shone from outside into the room, illuminating his expression. 
Marisol and the others turned around towards the door to check on what happened. They saw Dali, standing at a spot, her chest rising and falling. She had her hands on her knees, not for long before she dropped to her knees, losing consciousness.
“Dali!”
Celyn pushed past Marisol, running forward. She rushed to stand beside her friend, carrying the unconscious woman into her arms. Surrounding her were the ashes left from the vampires that attacked. 
“Dali!” She shook her repeatedly, but there was not even the faintest response from her.
Back in the room, Alexa let go of Damon. She glared at Chase before she turned around and walked out of the room. 
Marisol stood there, her back to the men. “Dali doesn’t have to do much. The fact that she has chosen to remain a good person, one that defends you against your enemies, a woman that kept her heart pure, is enough vengeance.”
She looked over her shoulder at him. “And the fact that you will continue to live as yourself is something for her to be happy about.”
“You will never be better. That is what comforts her.” She walked out.
Chase stood there, his mouth agape. 
Guilt had burned through him for days, but he had never been crippled by the emotion like he was at the moment. 
Marisol was right. 
As long as he was like this, as long as he walked through the world as Chase Konerak, a descendant of Rakmoon Pack, it was punishment enough for him.
He would never be better.
He turned his eyes away, but the heaviness in his chest was something he could not handle. Never had he felt this way. 
Never had he felt like this.
And he hated it.
Why didn’t he step out to help her? Why didn’t he help her? Why did he stay back in the dark room hiding his shame? Why did he do that when he could have just helped her?
Why was he such a monster?
His actions were the only thing that pursued the people he loved from his life. He should’ve done better. He should’ve been better.
“There’s still time, you know,” Damon said from behind him. 
“If you do feel rueful about what happened, in the past and now, well, there’s still time.”
Chase scoffed. “I wouldn’t forgive me for what I’ve done, Damon.” His voice was raspy.
“Well, luckily, Dali is not you. She’s better than you.”