"...Please do not come back."

"...Please do not come back."
She was not him, and that was what made her so special. She had a heart filled with the stars in the sky. And despite not being worthy, she stood by him against the vampires.
But all he could do was stay back like a weakling. 
Just like he did in the past. All he did was hurt her feelings, manipulate her, make her a form of entertainment for others to watch. All he did was bring her so much heartache, hit her, abandon her, but never let her leave. He reduced her, ridiculed her.
The reality of his actions slapped him across the face. 
Could he go back in time to fix this mess? Would he be able to treat her any better? Would he be able to love her the way she wanted? Would he still be overwhelmed with the guilt of losing the woman he ever truly loved?
Could he look at Dali and accept that she was his future? Would he be able to let himself be with her without feeling like he was betraying the woman in his memories?
It’s been years, three years now, but he still carries her in his heart. It’s been so long, and he still could not forget just how beautiful his wife had been. 
Years, and he had been unable to let himself be happy.
Years.
Three years.
And the grief was still crippling. 
Years, and he still craved her.
The only way he would be able to give Dali what she truly deserved was if he made an effort to move on. He could no longer live his life around what used to be. His wife would always be in his past; he cannot go back to the warmth of her arms. 
He could not go back to the feeling of her lips on his own.
His life was ahead and not in retrospect. Living with the memory of his wife was harm to himself and no one else. 
Chase stepped out of the hut, ten minutes too late. Dali needed him minutes ago, but only now could he drag his feet out of the door. Only now could he walk out with the pretense hanging over him that he was alright.
Damon had left him a while ago.
He had been the only one in the room, and now he was walking across the open field, but the woman who had stood there, fire exuding from the tips of her fingers, the woman who stood there killing twenty vampires all on her own, the woman who defended him, was no longer there.
Chase turned to the clinic, and there he saw Marisol and Deidre standing. Deidre was talking, and Marisol was quietly listening. It was clear as day on their faces that they were perturbed by the situation. 
Marisol saw him first. She straightened up that instant. Her expression was far from polite. When Chase first arrived here, he noted that Marisol wasn’t heavily against him like the rest of the healers were. 
What she held over him was apathy. As long as they never crossed paths, then they could live in peace. 
It was different now.
There was an irrevocable animosity burning behind her eyes—a darkness superior to the darkness of the night, a danger unmatched by the mystery of the forest. 
Chase could take her up in a fight; hell, he was sure that he would absolutely destroy Dali in a fight. However, in the coldness of the night, the guilt beating like a second heart, the chilling hands of his constant betrayal of her feelings gripping his warm heart, Chase felt nothing except a weakness that broke him apart.
He was a slave to them. 
He had words, but all he could do—all his body knew how to do—was stand there and just watch. Just look at her, hoping that she would finally see the guilt and the remorse inside of him. 
He wished she could see his genuine feelings. He wished she could recognize the need to be better, to do better.
It was quite shameful that this only surfaced right after he watched the same woman he ruined defend him. Initially, he only felt guilty regarding killing the healers when he was informed of the repercussions of their absence.
And what he felt now was the guilt of what he did to a woman so pure.
He absolutely wrecked her—for what?
For his ego.
He parted his lips, but the back of his throat was too dry. No words found their way out. He swallowed, but all to no avail.
Marisol turned her eyes away from him, meeting the pair of eyes that walked out of the clinic.
Alexa walked out, and the first person she saw was Chase. The strength in his bearing had disappeared into the darkness. What stood before her was a man completely different from the man she used to know.
However, pity and understanding were emotions strange to her—emotions she could never associate with Chase. Never would she pity him. Never would she understand the reason he did what he did.
He had the choice to be different. But he chose this path. And this was his repercussion.
“Dali is fine,” Alexa said, her eyes on Marisol. “She was just burnt out. Lack of sleep and her magic took a lot from her.”
Marisol nodded her head. “She did mention to me she had trouble sleeping.”
“That was last year,” Deidre pointed out. “Do you think she never overcame that?”
Alexa scoffed, “Do you think she would be able to overcome the nightmares? The memory of what she didn’t realize she did to us?” Her eyes darted to Chase. “She blames herself for trusting someone she had hope in.”
Chase’s head sank lower.
Of course, their words were accurate. 
It was all his fault.
“Can I see her?”
“No,” Marisol said firmly. “You’re not allowed to go anywhere near her. You’re a jinx, the physical form of bad luck and misfortune. You should grant her the pleasure of noticing your absence.” 
Chase’s heart clenched, squeezed tightly by her words. For a second, he was unable to breathe, unable to hold his heart. But this was what he deserved. 
He nodded his head. “I’ll go with Damon. I’ll try and gather the wolves I can find.”
“Don’t come back,” Marisol said. “Please, do not come back.”
“Let her be.”
Chase pressed his lips into a line, his heart clenching like it was being milked. He swallowed, but he swallowed nothing. 
“I want to be better, Marisol.” His voice came out shaky.
“Be better far from here. We want nothing to do with your growth.”
This was the most Marisol had ever said, and all of it was directed at him, and all of it was to convince him to leave.
And no one stood up for him, and this was because she was right. It was only fair, only reasonable that he should leave.
How pathetic to come take shelter from the same people he destroyed.
Chase returned to the hut in slow, heavy steps. Damon stood outside, watching him as he approached. He could not hide the fact that he had overheard the conversation. 
The distance was not too great, and he was an alpha.
“Are you really leaving?” he blurted out.
Chase nodded his head. “That’s what is best.”