19. Trust Issues.

[Emily]

"Maybe it's because of who you are." I wanted to shout back at him but I just kept quiet and removed his hand from mine.

"I c-can't, I just can't." I didn't even bother to look at the people watching us as I made a beeline for the door.

"Wait, Em." I heard Ace behind me, coming after me and I stopped when I got outside.

"I get it, you don't trust me." He sighed and I looked everywhere else but at him because he was right.

I didn't trust him and I couldn't bring myself to believe what he was saying.

"Just let me drop you off at home." He sighed looking at his smart watch. "Your parents won't be home for another hour so that should give you ample time to get home and settle in before they get there."

"How do you know that?" I asked, narrowing my eyes at him.

He gave me the look that said 'do you not know who I am'

"Nevermind, fine, please drop me off at home."

This time when I climbed on his bike, I did not need an invitation to wrap my hands around his waist, I even tightened my arms a bit when he started riding and I rested my head on his back.

"You smell so nice." I murmured in a daze and when I snapped out of it, I was glad he didn't hear what I said.

"Thank you very much." I said when he dropped me off and when I got to the door I realized that he was right, my parents were not home and they'd left the key in the flower pot beside the door like they usually did.

"They're not home." I smiled at him after retrieving the key.

"Are you trying to ask me to come in?" He looked very amused.

"What… no… n-no, I didn't s-say, I didn't mean that." I stuttered nervously.

"Calm down, Em, I was only joking." He laughed and I smiled awkwardly.

"Okay, goodbye." I waved at him awkwardly.

"Wait." He stopped me just as I was about to open the door and I turned around swiftly, my back hitting the door as he walked up to me.

He leaned into me, his eyes never leaving mine except for an occasional dart to my lips and then back up.

He smiled and I closed my eyes out of nervousness. I waited for something to happen but I opened my eyes when I felt his hot breath on my neck.

"You smell nice." He pulled away from me and grinned.

My whole face turned red as I realized that he'd heard what I said on the bike and I rushed into the house as he walked back to his bike. I waited for the engine to start and leave before falling down to my feet and leaning against the door.

My heart was beating rapidly, it felt like it might jump out of my chest at any time now.

When I finally got my heart to settle, I got up from the door and looked around the living room, my parents hadn't told me they were going out and I knew that they would probably leave a note for me, I never took a phone with me when I was going for confession so they wouldn't have been able to reach me on my phone.

I smiled as I picked up a sticky note that had been attached to our flower pot.

"Going out to buy some groceries." I read the note aloud and I chuckled. "Groceries indeed."

Last I checked there was still enough groceries in the house, my parents should have just said they went out for lunch or something believable like that.

I recounted the little moments with Ace as I walked up to my room lazily.

"Jenny, pick up the damn phone." I yelled at my phone as I called Jenny.

I had to talk about my feelings with someone or I might just explode.

Now Jenny did not have a boyfriend that I was aware of but she was very knowledgeable in this kind of things and I knew that she would be able to help me.

"Best friend." She answered drowsily.

"Have you been sleeping?" I asked, feeling guilty for disturbing her sleep.

"Yeah but I'm awake now." She yawned. "What's the matter?"

"I need you here ASAP, it's urgent."

"Are your parents home?"

"No, they're out but we have just a few minutes." I told her.

"Okay, I'm on my way."

I waited a few minutes after the call and since Jenny's house wasn't far from mine, she was ble to make it to my place immediately.

"Hey." I greeted as she walked into my house.

"You said it was urgent, what is it?"

"Don't tell me that you've killed somebody."

"Hell no, where's the body, I know a bunch of ways to dispose of the body without being caught, we can—"

"Jenny!"

"First of all don't swear in my room, second of all what in the world is wrong with you, do I look like I can ever kill somebody?"

"Ah, that's right, then it has to do with Ace."

Immediately she mentioned his name, I started blushing for no reason.

"Yes."

"Okay, spill it, child."

"I'm confused Jenny, he said he likes me and he likes hanging out with me and I just don't know what—"

"Wait a second let me ask you a question, Emily." She interrupted. "What is it that you want?"

"That's the problem, Jen, I—"

"Nope, that's not the problem, the problem seems to me that you're scared, scared of trusting him because you're not sure about the rumors and neither are you sure about his feelings and you don't want to get hurt." She said.

"Remind me again why you're not majoring in Psychology when you get to college?"

"Because I do not enjoy listening to people cry about their problems." She shrugged.

"Hey, that was mean." I pouted.

"You know I didn't mean you." She smiled and ruffled my hair. "Have you tried on any of those clothes we bought anywhere?"

"No, I haven't had the chance to wear them." I said. "Besides my father is around and I'm just laying my head down and staying out of trouble."

"So, back to Ace, I don't honestly know if the rumors are true but what I know is if you don't follow your heart because you're afraid, you'll end up with regrets."

"And are regrets so bad?"

She face palmed herself before she responded.

"Yes."

"Look, we're still young, Emily, this is.thd time for us to take risks and experience a lot of things, you just have to be careful and set a boundary that you wouldn't ever cross over like the alcohol and drugs territory but other than that, I'd say we live our lives to the fullest." She said.

"So you're saying I should just go with the flow?" I asked.

She shook her head.

"I'm saying you should just quit worrying about things you cannot control and allow yourself to feel, if you like him and he likes you then there's nothing stopping you from being together."

"Yeah right, nothing except my father, my mother and the girls in school, especially Olivia."

"Nothing and no one should be an influencing factor in how you live your life, I'd just adviss you to damn the consequences and live a little boo."

"Okay." I smiled, I felt much better after speaking to Jenny. "I'll just text him now." I said and began to fidget.

"Nah, I have a better idea, why don't we attend Olivia's party tonight, I'm sure Ace would be there, you can stun him with that black dress and talk to him about your feelings." She said.

"Olivia's party, hell no." I shook my head.

"Stop swearing." She hit me with a pillow and I retaliated immediately. "Why not?"

"My parents would never allow me." I said.

"And who said anything about asking them?"

"No, Jenny, I can't, I just came from confession, I don't want to sin again so soon."

"We could say you're staying over at my place for a sleepover, it's technically not a lie."

"Jenny."

"Emily, it's junior year, next year we'll be seniors and planning to go to college, you'll not have any high school stories to tell, I thought you wanted to come out of the shadows." She said.

Well, there's a saying about best friends, they get you into the worse shit ever and of course I said yes to Jenny.

She rushed back home because I was sure that my parents would still be back home, they never stayed out more then three hours when I was home alone and it was almost more than that.

After Jenny left, I decided to clean my room, I was going through my textbooks on my desk when I found another sticky note attached under the table.

It was a rather odd place to keep a note you wanted someone to find but my father had done crazier things so I didn't even put it past him.

"We're watching you." I frowned when I read the note.