Chapter 27

*Livie*

“Breathe. Just Breathe.” I whispered to myself while my thoughts raced, trying to wrap my mind around the story I’d just heard. My head cradled in my hands, and my eyes fixed firmly on my feet, I took slow, controlled breaths, afraid I might pass out. James was rubbing circles on my back with his strong hand, and normally that would have been the most comforting feeling in the world. Right now, though, he wasn’t just my husband. He was the man who kept an unforgivable secret. “Who else knows?” I uttered the only question on my mind, wholly unprepared for any answer he’d give me.

“Your dad, obviously. Me. Trav. My dad knew, but he took it to the grave.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Anger was easy, so I let it take control. “I married you, for fuck’s sake! How could you keep this from me?” I jumped up from the couch and started pacing the living room. The anger was good. Anger kept me from collapsing into a puddle of nothingness. My entire life has been a lie.

“You knew what he was like! You knew! Your dad knew! And you left me there!” The rage washed over my being. “Is that why we’re together? You feel guilty? This is a pity marriage?” I could hear the words spewing from my mouth, knowing how absurd they were, but refused to stop myself. James sat silent, watching me pace, taking every ounce of wrath I heaped on him. No matter how much I wanted to, I refused to meet his eyes. The pain he carried on his face would derail my warpath. I couldn’t let anything interfere with that.

“Why now?! Why did they want me to know now? After all this time?” In the beat that it took me to ponder the rationale behind the timing, the fortress of anger formed a tiny crack. “What does this have to do with whoever attacked me?” The realization that none of this could possibly be a coincidence nearly knocked me off my feet. I collapsed into the armchair across from James’s seat on the couch. Still clinging to the scraps of fury that remained, my resolve to hide behind the strength of ire was waning.

“I don’t know how it’s all connected.” My husband’s voice picked away at the gaps forming in the wall I constructed around my heart. The same voice that helped to put each brick in place as his secret was revealed little by little. “I don’t even understand why there’s a police report. Or an autopsy. From what I remember, Nick and dad covered it up. They buried the body.” I studied his face, looking for any signs of deception. Any clue that there is more to it. A flash of something went across his face so quickly that if I hadn’t been staring at him, I wouldn’t have seen it.

“What are you not telling me?” I sounded cold and distant. Not like the loving wife I wanted to be just an hour ago.

“Detective Shepherd knows something.” The silence was thick with anticipation. Finally, James continued. “He mentioned the abuse during my interview. Then he came here, to the house, to ask if dad knew. It didn’t make sense. If Nick told someone, he’d only be screwing himself. He said he didn’t believe Nick’s accusations about me and wanted to help. I didn’t trust him.”

“Is that when you told Travis?” He nodded in response to my question and hung his head, the weight of tonight’s revelations crushing us both. My body sagged in the soft leather chair, exhaustion having taken the place of the rage I desperately wanted to cling to. James stood, moving to the bar cart in the corner, and poured us both a generous helping of whiskey. Moving to stand in front of me, he kneeled down and handed me the glass full of amber liquid.

“I’m sorry. I should have told you. It took me years to work through the shame and horror inflicted on me by that man. Knowing who he was made it easy to give you refuge, but Livie, I love you. That is why I married you.” He took a deep breath, contemplating his next words. “In the spirit of honesty, my timing was driven out of fear. Fear that Nick would find a way to take you away from me. Or that he would hurt you. But I’d do it over again without a moment of hesitation. Livie, you make me feel things I didn’t believe were real.” I sipped my drink, focusing on the warmth that spread through me as it slipped down my throat. Finally finding the courage to look him in the eye, he continued. “If you need to hate me for a while, that’s ok. I’ll be here when you’re ready. I meant it when I said that Nick wasn’t taking anything else from us.”

Tears flowed freely down his cheeks, and the pain etched into his expression was gut wrenching. My anger was back, but this time it was for him. For the little boy that Nick hurt. For the man who desperately wanted to protect his wife. For the life he stole. I wasn’t the only one who had suffered at the hands of that wretched man. He had to pay.

*James*

“Liv, I understand where you’re coming from, but I’m telling you if dad didn’t come forward back then there was a reason.” Anger at me shifted into anger at Nick. She was determined to find a way to make him pay. “I never understood either. Then dad died, and I never got the chance to find out why he protected Nick.” This had eaten at me for years, but I couldn’t risk talking about it.

“We need to talk to Detective Shepherd. Find out what he knows. How he knows.” Livie was back to pacing around the living room, and I let a smile rest on my face as I watched this incredible woman talk passionately about getting justice. She was fierce. A true warrior. “What?” Confusion settled in as she caught me smiling at her.

“God, I love you so much!” I stalked towards her, closing the gap between us, needing to feel her in my arms. My lips crashed into hers, all the while I was praying she wouldn’t pull away. I snaked my arms around her waist, pulling her into me. She let out the slightest sigh, and I took that opportunity to deepen our kiss, running my tongue across her lips, inwardly begging for permission. In an instant, her arms were around my neck, hands fisting my hair, our kiss becoming frenzied with lust and an aching thirst for one another.

A primal groan erupted from my throat as she squirmed against my erection. Sliding my hands down below her ass, gripping the backs of her thighs, I lifted her up, and she wrapped her legs around my waist. This position gave Liv the opportunity to grind against me, and all I could think about was burying myself deep inside her.

In our bedroom, she stripped out of her yoga pants and t-shirt, my breath catching in my throat at the sight of her. “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” She walked backward until her knees hit the side of our bed, then laying her body across it. I let my gaze wander up and down her body, memorizing every part of her.

“Make love to me, husband.” The words I had longed to hear sounded like a chorus of angels, but I wanted to take my time and cherish her body.

“We have all night, wife. I’m not going anywhere.” I dropped to my knees in front of her, sliding my hand from the back of her ankle up to the back of her knee. Dropping my head, I placed a gentle kiss on the inside of her thigh, halfway between her hip and her knee. Slowly, I kissed, nipped and sucked my way upward, then lazily dragged my tongue from the bottom of her entrance to the bundle of nerves that pulsed with every breath she took.

The moans coming from Liv were almost enough to make me come undone before I was even inside her. I took my time with the oral exploration of her tender flesh until her stiff movements let me know she was close to climax. As she came down from her orgasm, I slowly crawled up the bed, trailing kisses up her body, nipping at her stomach, sucking on her nipples and finally meeting my lips to hers.

Liv wiggled underneath me, positioning herself to push against my erection. “Are you sure?” I whispered, holding her gaze. We hadn’t made love since her attack, and as much as I wanted her, it was more important that she was ready. “I want you inside me now.” She commanded, and I readily obliged. We easily found our rhythm. Letting her set the pace, we both found our release quickly, and, laying in our bed, I held my wife and everything felt right for the first time in a long time.