Chapter 35 Gabe kissed me...Ryan saw us
Saraphina
"Well, she told me to be patient. She said you have built a wall around yourself. That when you care for someone, you run because you are afraid of being hurt."
Wow. That was spot on. I had never actually said those words to anyone. I did not think my mother was that perceptive.
"I suppose that is true," I said.
"But I would never hurt you, Saraphina. Because I really, really like you." Gabe said it with such certainty, his warm eyes locked on mine.
Good Lord.
I did not know what to say. I had not expected that at all. Before I could form a single word, Gabe leaned in and his lips were on mine.
I stood there, completely still from shock. When my senses returned, I pulled back and pushed against his chest. Gabe’s eyes flew open, waiting for my reaction. And from the corner of my eye, I saw Ryan. He was staring straight at us, and he looked furious. Absolutely fucking furious.
"Gabe… I am sorry… I do not…" I turned back to his confused face. "I need a minute," I said, before turning and hurrying toward the restroom.
What on earth just happened out there? Inside the bathroom, I stood at the mirror, trying to catch my breath. My thoughts were moving way too fast. Gabe kissed me. Ryan saw it. That is what happened.
I thought I had been clear with Gabe. I never meant to lead him on. I truly thought we were just friends. My mom was right about me, but she was wrong about Gabe. This was a huge misunderstanding, and I had to fix it.
I was trying to figure out what to say to him when the stall behind me opened and Vanessa walked out. She looked… well, she looked good, I suppose, in a very tight red dress that showed a lot.
"Oh, you are RJ’s sister, right?" she said, coming to stand at the mirror beside me.
"My name is Saraphina," I said.
She ignored me, busy fixing her hair and dress. "You do not think this is too short, do you?" she asked, gesturing to the hem.
"No," I said. Honestly, she might as well have worn a napkin.
"Red is Ryan’s favorite color," she went on, now applying a deep red lipstick. "He will not be able to resist this." She grinned at her own reflection.
"How long have you known Ryan?" I asked, trying to sound casual.
"Since high school. We used to date. On and off."
"Oh." That was not what Ryan had told me. I did not know which story was true. I had spent all this time with him, but maybe I did not know him at all.
"What was he like? Back then?" I asked.
"The guy is a fucking god, and he knows it. Men want to be him, and women want to sleep with him," she laughed. I swallowed hard.
"How long were you two… a couple?" I asked, keeping my voice steady.
"We were never really a couple couple. Ryan likes the chase. He is always after someone new. Even now. He told me he is crazy about some stupid girl. Says they have been spending time together, but she will not sleep with him." She smacked her lips together.
"Who is the girl?" I asked, my voice low.
"No idea, do not care. He said she is not from around here. Anyway, it does not matter. Once he has fucked her, he will get bored and come back to me. He always does." She looked immensely pleased with herself.
"If that is how he treats women… why do you still want him?"
"Why do you think? He is a fucking animal. The best I have ever had. No one else even comes close," she laughed, twisting a piece of her hair around her finger. "Fucking ruined me for anyone else," she muttered.
"God, I really need to get lucky tonight. Think this will work?" She turned to me for approval.
I nodded, barely, holding myself back from saying something awful.
Vanessa kept fussing with her makeup, but I did not want to stay another second. I gave her a quiet "see you later" and left.
Walking out, I could not help but wonder if what she said was true. Is that what would happen with Ryan and me? He would get what he wanted, and then I would be nothing?
But I had only taken three steps from the door when two strong arms grabbed me, pulling me forcefully away from the party. Of course, it was Ryan.
He did not speak. His hand was wrapped around mine so tight it was painful. He pulled me toward a secluded area with tall trees. Once we were far enough away, I struggled against him.
"Ryan, stop! Let me go!" It was no use.
When he decided we were alone, he finally released me.
"What is your problem?" I snapped.
"You have no idea. It took everything I had not to break that kid’s fucking face!" Ryan’s eyes were dark with anger. He meant Gabe.
"Do not! Do not you dare touch him," I said, trying to calm him, but it only made him angrier.
"Why the fuck not? I cannot just stand there while some guy kisses my girl!"
Wait. What?
I think my heart swelled to twice its size when he said "my girl." But my mind quickly dragged me back.
"Ryan, I am not your girl," I stated.
His expression shifted from anger to something like confusion, like he was losing his footing.
He knew he was losing me. So he took my arms and pulled me to him, his mouth coming down on mine. He kissed me hard, like he was trying to win an argument. I used all my strength to push him away, and when I could not, I turned my head.
"Ryan, stop!" I cried out. "I cannot do this anymore." My voice was soft, and I felt the tears coming.
"What are you talking about?"
"This has gone too far. We need to end it before… before it is too late."
"Too late for what?"
"Before one of us starts feeling something real. A few days ago, I hated seeing you with Vanessa. Tonight, you are mad about Gabe. It should not be like this. It got complicated."
I let out a frustrated breath. Ryan said nothing. He knew I was right. And I had to finish this.