Chapter 16 Fuck, I really need to get laid.
Saraphina
A few days had gone by since the trouble at the bonfire, and I was starting to feel more like myself again. Earlier this week, I went with Mom and Clement to watch Ryan in his surfing competition. I do not really know all the rules of surfing, but anyone could see that Ryan was amazing. People said he scored high enough to move on to the next round.
Even though I do not understand the sport, I think I finally get why girls go crazy for surfers. Just watching Ryan out there, so focused and full of life, was something else. All that intensity is hard to look away from. And when he came out of the water after his surf, shaking his wet hair, his board shorts sitting low on his hips, his body all wet and tan, with that incredible smile on his face…
Good grief. Stop it, Saraphina. You are not helping yourself.
But really, things were good for us. Mom and Clement seemed truly happy, and all the wedding plans were coming together. I was not sure about Clement at first, but now I can see how serious they are. I can really picture them staying together for a long time, and I am happy for my mom. She was right about him. This is the most real relationship she has ever had.
While our parents were getting closer, Ryan and I were doing just fine, too. I noticed he goes for a run and trains at the beach most mornings. In the afternoons, he hangs around the house, but he spends a lot of time in the garage, working on his surfboards. I also realized he hardly ever wears a shirt. I have not seen him in one for the last three days.
Thank God for Hawaii.
I tried my best not to stare, but he caught me every single time. I really have to get a grip on that. And as usual, he uses every chance he gets to make a dirty joke or tease me about being a virgin. Like the other day, we were just sitting on the sofa watching TV. He was eating some dried cherries, healthy snacks for the athlete, when he suddenly turned to me and said, "You know what I think? Somebody really needs to pop that cherry of yours before it dries up for good." Then he put a dried cherry in his mouth. I answered by hitting him in the face with a pillow.
So, I guess what I am trying to say is… this whole brother-sister thing is not so terrible.
If you were worried about me, do not be. I know where the line is. Even though I look at Ryan a lot, it is just a silly crush. I know better than to cross that line with him. Especially with the wedding getting closer every day. I can already see it: my mom, Clement, Ryan, and me, all together as one big, happy family.
Ryan
Something must be seriously wrong with me. Ever since that night, I cannot get her out of my head. Sure, I have thought about girls before. But I usually thought about their bodies, or what it would be like to be with them. This is not like that with Saraphina.
I think about her smile all the time. It is one of those real ones, the kind that makes you smile back without even thinking. I think about what makes her smile, what makes her laugh. I even started listening to the music she likes. And I have started to notice all her little habits, like how she cannot swear properly and makes up her own words instead, like "son-of-a-biscuit" or "mother-trucker" or my personal favorite, "fudge-sicles".
I would be lying if I said I did not think about other things, too. Like one time, she was trying to get something from the top shelf in the kitchen. When she reached up, her shirt rose and I saw the bare skin of her hips and lower back, and a little bit of her pink underwear peeking out. I made a joke about her wearing pink. She turned bright red, and it was the cutest thing I have ever seen. Then she smacked my arm, of course, because that is what she does when she gets embarrassed.
If she were not about to become my stepsister… I would want her in a second.
It would be a lie to say I have never imagined being with her. Once her bruises faded, Saraphina started wearing clothes that showed a little more skin. It is great to look at, but it is pure torture. I am not kidding, I get hard just thinking about her and what happened in the woods. She was almost assaulted by a psycho, and I get turned on because I fucking held her. How messed up is that?
I let out a sigh and shook my head at myself. I decided to call it a night. I have a big match in the morning, and I need to focus my energy somewhere else. So, I threw myself onto my bed and tried my hardest to fall asleep.
I tossed and turned all night, and I woke up in the dark, my throat feeling dry. I tried to go back to sleep, but I could not. So, I went down to the kitchen, got a glass, and filled it with water. I was just leaning against the counter when I heard a sound.
Saraphina was coming down the stairs, rubbing her eyes. I did not think she saw me; it was dark, and her eyes were only half-open. She walked right past me and went to the fridge. She opened it and bent down to look for something. As she did, her backside was just inches away from me.
I swallowed hard.
She did not seem to notice I was there. Seeing her so close made my whole body go tense. Saraphina grabbed a carton of milk, shut the fridge door, and stood up. As she moved away, I felt a sudden, powerful need to close the space between us.
Before I could stop myself, I stood up and stepped toward her, wrapping my arms around her from behind. She jumped a little.
"It is just me," I said quietly, near her ear.
"Ryan?" she whispered back.
She knew it was me. I did not need to answer. I just buried my face in the side of her neck and let my lips brush against her skin. I took a deep breath, taking in her smell, and I felt her shiver.
"Ryan?" she said again.
This time, I lifted my head and saw her looking right at me. Her breathing was uneven, and she swallowed hard. Right then, I could see it in her eyes. She wanted me just as much as I wanted her.
Fuck yes.
I felt myself smile, and Saraphina looked panicked. She was about to say something when I put my finger on her lips to keep her quiet.
This was my chance, and I was going to take it.
Without any warning, I leaned in and kissed her softly on the mouth. I thought of all the things she might do, push me away, slap my face, maybe even knee me. But she did none of those things. Instead, she kissed me back.
I let out a low sound and pulled her tighter against me as the kiss got deeper. She turned her head to the side and let out a small, shy moan. One of my hands was holding her in place, and the other was cupping her soft face. She let her free hand move to the back of my head, and she started to run her fingers through my hair. As the kiss became more intense, she began to grip my hair and pull on it gently. I was lost in the taste of her as my tongue traced her bottom lip, asking to come in. Saraphina let out another moan, and that was when I lost all control.
I turned her around quickly and pressed her back against the fridge. She let out a small gasp, and I used that moment to slip my tongue into her mouth. She dropped the milk carton, and I could hear the milk spilling out onto the floor.
My mind went blank as our tongues met and moved together. I explored her mouth, greedy for every part of her. She moaned again, and I smiled against her lips because it meant she was enjoying this. Taking that as a good sign, I moved to kiss her neck. I saw the faint bruises there, and my jaw clenched. I kissed every one of them, wishing I could replace those marks with my own. She let out another moan, and I had to put my hand over her mouth to keep her from being too loud.
At the same time, my other hand moved under her shirt and found her breast.
I was glad she was not wearing a bra. I really like her breasts. They are just the right size, and they fit perfectly in my hand. I gently pulled on her nipple, and she began to move against me. Her moans were getting louder, and I had to press my hand harder over her mouth. As my fingers played with her nipple, Saraphina opened her eyes and looked at me with a desperate kind of look.
Oh, fuck, I cannot wait any longer, either.
In one quick move, I lifted her and put her on the kitchen counter. We kissed again, hot and full of wanting. Both of my hands were on her waist, pulling her closer and closer to me, even though there was no space left between us. I was hard, so hard, and she felt it too, because she jumped a little at the contact. I thought she might pull away, but she did not. So I did not stop. Instead, she put her hand on my lower back and pulled me closer. I pushed her thighs apart so I was positioned right where I wanted to be, and I moved against her. We were both still fully dressed, but I could feel that she was wet, wet for me.
She let out a sigh as I started to move against her, slow at first, then faster. As I got rougher, she moaned and her nails dug into my shoulders. I was so hard it was almost painful. I could not hold back any longer. I pushed her panties to the side, freed myself from my boxers, and pressed the tip of my cock against her wet opening.
Saraphina went completely still. I had one arm behind her back to hold her in place and my other hand over her mouth. She felt so warm and wet, and it was so fucking good. This feels so damn good…
Shit, I am going to push inside her right now…
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
My alarm clock blared, and my eyes snapped open. It was at that moment I realized it was all a dream. A fucking dream. Of course.
I was breathing hard and flustered, and I could see my hard-on straining against the sheets.
Shit. Fucking shit.
Of course, it was a dream. Saraphina would never really do that with me. I groaned loudly and hit myself in the head for being so stupid.
Fuck, I really need to get laid.