Chapter 85
“Mrs. Stone, we had to put Derek into an induced coma. He lost a lot of blood, and we tried to repair the damage as best as we could. We gave him as much blood as we possibly could, but now it's just a matter of letting his body heal. If everything goes the way it should, he should be just fine.”
“So, he should wake up right?”
“That is what we are hoping for, but for now, we are going to let his body heal.”
“Thank you for calling me and letting me know. I really appreciate it.”
“Yes, and if there is any other news I will call you. Have a nice night, and get some rest.”
I hang up the phone in relief. I'm terrified that Derek might not wake up, but I don't want to even think about that. I grab a towel and dry myself off. I get a night shirt out of my closet, and I put it on. I look over at the night stand seeing Jill's letter that she wrote. I go to open it, but then I hear Faithlyn crying. I get up to go check on her and to see what is going on.
I explain to Summer, “Hey Sumer. I can put her to bed so that you can get some rest. She is just getting used to you, so she may give you a run for your money.”
“It's ok Miss Amelia. I will be able to put her to sleep if you're able to bare with her crying just a little bit. She is just fine I can promise you that.”
“To be honest Sumer, after the day that I have had, I could really use some of her cuddles. I appreciate all of your help, but I think her cuddles would be the perfect end to a horrible day.”
“Well Miss Amelia, when you say it like that, then I think that you need her cuddles more than me. I will leave you to it.”
“Sumer, before you go I just wanted to say thank you so much for all your help today. I know that Jill would really appreciate it too, thank you.”
“Miss Amelia, you really need to read her letter so that you know what is going on, but why not wait until tomorrow. I can tell that both of you are exhausted, and you guys could use some rest.”
Faithlyn is being so restless. It's probably because of Derek not being home. Her daddy puts her to bed almost every night. I try to sing her favorite song You Are My Sunshine, but I must not sing it as good as daddy does because she just looks at me and cries. As I look into her beautiful green eyes, all I can think about is how much she looks like her father. I'm so disappointed in myself from keeping secrets from Derek, especially the one that might have cost him his life today. If he ever figured out what I have done would he ever forgive me for it since it had to be done?
As I cradle Faithlyn, I am terrified that our lives might change forever because of me. I know that I regretted my decision, but now I realize that I am insane for regretting it. How could I ever regret the choice to protect my own child. I would do it all over again to protect her, and I wouldn't change a thing. She is my entire life, and the reason I do anything is for her. I love Derek, don't get me wrong, but the truth of it is he is not the love of my life. She is, and if something would ever happen to her I would never be able to bare it. If something happened to Derek, it would be hard, but I would live on because of Faithlyn. She would need me to be strong and take care of her, so that's what I would do for her. All I ever really wanted was love. I thought that I felt that love with Derek, but boy was I wrong. The true love that I feel is the love for my daughter that no man would ever be able to give me because it can only be given by her.
I look into her eyes, and I can tell she's finally getting sleepy. Her eyelids are getting heavy, and I watch her completely close her eyes as she falls asleep. I lay on the bed and just keep replaying what has happened today just trying to figure out if there was anything that could have happened differently. I know that everything happens for a reason, but I'm wondering what the reason is behind the things that happened. I hate that I went to such extremes that I would kill someone and take someone else's life from them. I know in my heart that I would do it all over again for my daughter. I think to myself, does it make me evil and does it make me just like them? After all I wasn't the one to kill them, but I sent hitmen to kill them. I am starting to overthink things, so then I think about the fact that I am nothing like them. All the things that I've done had reasoning behind them. I tried to reason with them, but they didn't want reason they only wanted control. I guess that is just what happens when you try to mess with a mother's world.
I get up from the rocking chair, and I walk over to the bed. I see Jill's note, and I decide put it on the night stand. I'm not really sure if I can handle anything more today. I lay Faithlyn down in my bed, and I try to fit my body comfortably beside her as my arms cradled her body. I close my eyes wanting to fall asleep and wanting this day to just be over already. I'm trying so hard to just not think about everything that is running through my mind like wildfire. I force myself to close my eyes. I know that I need rest, so I finally just let go and fall asleep.