Chapter 180 My Noor-e-Jaan

Chapter 180 My Noor-e-Jaan
After lunch, I took off my coat and gave it to Aalifa, I couldn’t remember when I was this ‘peacefully happy,’

Never once, even when I got married to her before, I was worried, when she got pregnant, I was vexed again. Yes, I was joyous but worry always lingered.

This tranquility was never a part of my existence and after a devilishly long time, it had joined my side.

“It’s time for prayer. We will be back, Jaan,”

“I need to donate to charity since I have found my peace. And we have to leave for our flight too, we have a twelve hour long flight,” I added, giving her a side hug before going. 

“So am I supposed to stay like this and wait for you?” She frowned, holding my sleeves. 

“Change if you want, I don’t mind watching you get ready again.” I smirked, pinching her cheek, reviving the glow on her face, causing her to grin.

“Cool,” 

Leaving to give out food after prayer. Since there was no mosque, we just prayed at home- Yes, I had started praying. It relieved my distress.

“Thank you,”

After giving the food, I ended up laughing, holding Asad and Erhan by their shoulders. 

“I can’t tell you how contented I am, my brothers,”

“Don’t mention, we can see it,” They chuckled, noticing how ecstatic their brother was, the endless glee was traveling to my core. 

My chest could burst from the liveliness in me, I swear.

After donating food and money, we went back. We were already late and had to leave hastily for our flight. We changed into something comfortable and went to the airport.

As much as I wanted to see my beautiful bride more, we had to leave.

“Take care, bless you, my love,” Her mother cried, kissing her hands at the airport.

She grinned and turned to her lastly who was unable to meet her gaze until she held his hand reassuringly.

She asked in broken tone, “Not going to look at me, Papa?” 

“Aalifa… I… I am sorry,” Her father looked down in shame, crying and ended up hugging her tightly.

“You have forgiven my worst mistakes, Papa. Don’t worry about anything. I love you,” She whispered, hugging him back, crying too. 

“Take care of yourself, my love. Always be happy, bless you,” 

“You too,” She chuckled, coming back to wrap her hands around my arm. 

After bidding her family goodbye, we went back and excitement reached my core. Erhan and Asad went to their respective places as I took her to my new home.

“Why did you sell the Ruby Palace?” She asked, taking a deep breath, to be back to her country once again.

“It was a cursed place anyways. I have prepared our new home. Let’s go and start our new lives,” I chuckled huskily, taking her to our new mansion.

It was adorned, using all the eye-catching decorations as my beloved was returning and things should reach the peak of charm.

“What do you think?” I smirked, scanning my woman. 

“It’s so… lavishing. I like it more,” She giggled. 

“Great. Now, go and get ready. I have called the stylist,”

“Already?”  

“Yeah. And don’t give me the tired excuse. You slept through the whole flight,” I smirked.

“Okay, okay,” 

It was night, I changed once again to my off white suit to indulge in the moment. 

Looking out of the window of our ravishing room, holding my hands at my back, I was waiting for my bride.

“I am ready,” Her melodious tone called.

She got dressed again, dripping inexplicable grace from her features that compelled me to stare at her entirely.

Seeing her like this, holding my hands, forming goosebumps all over my skin when we were in our embellished room decorated with candles.

“How do I look?” 

She asked shyly as we both faced each other, knowing no interruptions were going to occur today.

“How, you ask?” I chuckled, holding my sides, turning my head for a second.

“Did I ask something wrong?” 

Instantly worry came to her face when I let out a slightly mocking chuckle before hovering over her and pointing at my heart.

“After burning my soul, after intoxicating my mind, stealing my breaths away, sweeping my ground, cracking my sky, killing me with your grace…. You are asking- How are you looking?” I growled, my breaths reeking of my desires. 

I was dangerously closer to her face, earning a mesmerizing smile from her. Cupping my cheek with her henna filled hands, she whispered softly.

“So we are on the same page. You look the same.”  

Pausing at her comment, I blinked. 

Her words induced the realization that it was the moment I was deeply, madly, desperately wishing for.

Returning the same smile, I brought her hands down and kissed them. Closing my eyes, I could feel an abrupt lump around my throat. 

Tears began to collect as I let out a soft whimper, lifting my teary gaze, worrying Aalifa to no extent. 

“Zaviyaar, what happened?”

“If mother was here, she would be so happy,”

My voice broke, looking down in dejection. Her absence was stinging me too much.

“She wanted to see me like this. She died holding that wish…” 

The pain of not finding her here was aching me. 

“I am missing her wholeheartedly. She would have blessed us…”

“I am sorry for taking that away from you, I failed to realize how important you were to me,” She whispered, her lips starting to tremble when my posture stumbled.

“When I remained stubborn, got depressed, pushed you away from me… you didn’t get exhausted of me.” 

Closing her eyes, we both released a tear simultaneously when she pressed her head on my chest, clutching onto me. 

“I gave up on myself but you didn’t. Thank you, Zaviyaar, thank you so much for loving me,” 

“My love is not weak to give up on my life,” 

Wiping the tear, I made her stare into my soul. She licked her lips, blazing my desires to become one with her.

Making this point our destination, I leaned down, brushing my lips against hers. 

Smiling into the mystic sensation, she closed her eyes, shifting her hands upward to hold my collar when I pressed my lips more, taking her into a gradual, in-depth but passionate kiss.

Marking this moment the start of our new life, we held each other firmly, moving our lips in a perfect sync. Holding her waist with one hand, I held her neck to incline her accordingly.

After a heavenly kiss, we pulled away breathlessly, blending that sound to fill the absence of sound linked with a radiant smile.

“You are Noor-e-Jaan, light of life. My Noor-e-Jaan, light of my life,” 

Whispering, I kissed her cheeks before making her sit on the bed and sat on the ground myself. She frowned and was about to pull me up but I held her wrist.

“No,” 

“Zaviyaar?” 

She called compassionately, moving those slender fingers to my locks as I rested my head on her laps.

Remaining there, I could feel my chest constricting in pain, my body convulsed along with tears.

“It… was hard, Aalifa. Everything… in my life was…” 

Things I buried in my chest, words that I gobbled. Everything I suppressed in my chest started to overwhelm me and I scattered. 

I returned home and now wanted this ache to end.

“Letting you go, watching you break, going farther and farther from myself,”

Gripping onto her dress, I buried my face more.

Lips parting as I took rapid breaths but the anguish I kept inside me had decided to free itself today.

“All of it was unbearable, I swear, it was killing me from inside, Aalifa, but I bore with it,” 

Lifting my teary gaze, I ended up crying, breaking into a miserable, painful, gloomy sob.

“I just wanted someone to love me, I wanted to live a normal and happy life.” 

“I didn’t want to marry Saira, I didn’t want to become a womanizer, I didn’t want to cage you too, I didn’t want to let you go too,” 

Lowering my head more, the sound of my cries echoed in the room. Unable to bear my wailing, she let out a muffled cry too, holding onto me. 

“My life never went how ‘I’ wanted it,” 

Confessing, I was honestly lost in the midst of responsibilities, ob obligation, of my love, everything consumed me. 

I just wanted one chance to live for myself…

“It was so hard, I hated it, I wanted to express my feelings too, I wanted to live but I lost everything I loved or desired.” 

“I don’t want to lose anyone or anything anymore, I am done with heartbreaks, please don’t leave me again,” 

Soaking her dress with my tears, I placed my weak side. I couldn’t remain strenuous anymore, I was drained.

Knowing, when she scattered I held her and when now when I would, she would do the same.

Which she did, holding me how I did.

“I won’t, I promise I won’t, I am sorry, Zaviyaar,”

Gripping me so tightly, letting out silent tears as she kissed my forehead, then my shoulder, back to my head.

“I am here and will always be now, trust me. I won’t hurt you again, I will be yours,” 

She sobbed, embracing me, becoming the shore I had been seeking all this time.

Not releasing her, I was relaxed in her shadows as my shelter. My eyes were enervated, my body was sore. 

Refusing to lift my head from her laps. I held onto her dress, making an almost crying face.

“I am exhausted, Aalifa, I had been walking alone for too long,”

Wiping both mine and her tears, she caressed me as lovingly as possible.

“It's alright. All of if has passed, there is no pain anymore, nothing can come between you and me anymore.”

“Promise?” I asked innocently, making her shift to the ground as well. 

“I promise.” She murmured.

Kissing my cheeks as we remained like this, smiling with tears glistening in the corner. I wrapped my both hands around her arm before resting my head on her shoulder. 

“I am too tired. I want to rest,” 

“Rest, my love, this is over now, the light of your life is here, no one can steal it from you anymore.”

Smiling, I closed my eyes to reside in the arms of my beloved forever, to make it my sanctuary, to create my world of dreams there. 

To live and die there…