Chapter 256 - Nikolai's confession

Anastasia.

Why was he arguing with her because of me?

Her eyes widened in disbelief. “You…what did you say?” she gasped.

“I don’t need to repeat myself to you. Get out of this room. You are disturbing her.” He added, looking away.

“I’m disturbing? I’m?”

“Yes, please leave now! Because of your selfishness, she turned out like this. I don’t want you to cause any trouble anymore for her. Go back to your home.”

“You can’t send me away like this because of her!” Nina protested, grabbing onto his shoulders. “She can’t be more important to you than me! I’m your girlfriend. You love me!”

“No, I don’t. I don’t love you!”

“Yes, you do!” she fisted against his chest. “You love me, you love….why did you hug her then? Why did you eat the food she made so happily? Why can you talk about your worries with her? You used to do all of that with me right? Then how can you replace me so easily with her?”

He removed her hand away, looking into her face.

“Many years have passed since you left. There’s no way I’m going to be smitten with you only all the time. Whatever there was between us is over. I don’t want to have you in my life anymore.”

“Can’t we start over?” she pleaded, smiling a forced smile.

“No!” he responded coldly. “There’s nothing to start over from. We have both left our past behind. You can’t become my present. My present is already taken by someone. I can’t love you again.”

“No! You are lying! You can’t love someone else other than me!”

“I never said I won’t. Get out of your delusional world! She’s hurt because of you. How are you going to take that responsibility?” he yelled, pointing in my direction.

“Why do I have to take responsibility for the person who took you away from me?” she yelled. “She deserved it, that’s why it happened with her. What could I do about it? Don’t give the blame on me!”

“Nina,” Nikolai called softly. “Get out of this room! I don’t want to see you here at all!”

Her eyes widened and she walked out of the room without looking back behind her.

He closed the door looking as disheartened as ever. Then approached me.

“Why were you so harsh with her?” I asked.

Hearing my voice, he rushed to my side the very minute.

“Are you awake?” he whispered, sitting down next to the bed.

“Yeah, a while ago. Sorry for listening to your conversation.”

“Stupid!” grunted. “You don’t need to apologize for anything at all! I’m just happy to see you awake!”

“But, she didn’t seem happy. She was mad at me.”

“I don’t care about what she thinks of either of us,” he added. “And you don’t need to think as well.”

“So, how did I end up in your room? I was in the forest right?”

I don’t know why, I feel hesitant to see face-to-face. Must be because of the strange things she said.

“Do you remember what happened during the race?” he asked.

“Yeah.”

“Tell me about it. And no lies.”

I gulped. Remembering the scene.

“I was running with silver. After a few minutes in the middle of the forest…….”

“What happened in there?”

I clenched my fists tightly. “A horse came in front of me out of nowhere, making Silver stumble and lose his balance. And then, I fell together with him.”

“And who was on that horse?”

“I can’t tell you.”

“It was Nina, wasn’t she?” he remarks. “The only reason, she called out for the competition was just to play dirty on you.”

“I don’t know….maybe she didn’t do it intentionally–“

“Why are you covering up for her? She doesn’t deserve it,” he stated, his voice filled with guilt. “I shouldn’t have allowed her to compete with you. That’s why your forehead is injured. And you have cuts all over your arm and your left leg is sprained along with cuts.”

“I really don’t mind this. It’s my fault not to be able to protect myself. I’m not a good rider yet. I need to learn more–“

“Nina has been a professional horse rider since she was a child with lots of medals for it,” he interrupted, “Despite that, she dared to challenge herself to someone like you, who is an amateur. She must’ve planned to bring you down from the beginning.”

I had no words to defend her. Cause I knew better than anyone that she did this intentionally.

“She seems to hate you a lot to play this sick prank of hers on you.” he joked, but he wasn’t laughing at it.

“She hates me because you are too nice to me,” I replied, looking back at him. “Why are you so nice to me? Why don’t you treat her as you treat me?”

He didn’t break eye contact and stayed silent.

“Do you treat me nicely because you pity me for my bad reputation? Or because I work in your house? Or do you think I’m unfortunate to be kicked out of my pack? What’s your reason for being so generous towards me for no reason? I’m confused! J always want to know it, but I don’t dare to ask you about it,” I stated. “So, I want the answer today. Say it!”

“You really wanna know it?” he asked calmly.

“Yes, I want to know it. I feel like I have to know it because–“

“It’s because I love you!” his declaration caught me off guard.

I felt like my ears were ringing so I heard something wrong.

“Huh? What?”

“I’m nice to you because I love you. Not because I pity you or sympathize with your situation. I love you on equal ground as a person like me. And I couldn't care less about your bad reputation. You are no different in my eyes. I still like you.” he stated without any hesitation.

I finally realize now, the weird feeling I felt in my chest whenever he was near me.

Because I felt the same way towards him.

“I had been planning to say this for a while, but the opportunity never seemed to come,” he continued, lowering his gaze. “I’m a coward so I can never say what’s on my mind truly. But, I don’t think waiting any longer will do any good. I had been in love with you for long. For as long as you came here to live with us.”