Chapter 8- The Showcase

Adam has been working so hard practicing for the showcase. He's created a smash up of songs to dance to. We've been working on the hip hop portion together and he's even added a little country to it. I don't know all the songs he's chosen, I know the order of genres and the bits and pieces I've helped with, but I can't wait to see it all together. For the last couple weeks he's been rehearsing alone, just him and the music which is okay because I've needed that time to study for my own finals. Tonight's the showcase and I don't know who's more nervous, me or Adam. We decided yesterday I would give Adam some space to get mentally prepared or whatever. But I will be waiting backstage after his performance. I decide to dress up for the showcase, I put on this beautiful white lace dress with a high low design and a sweetheart neckline, my floral heels, I curl my hair, and pull it half up so it is out of my face. I have some time before the showcase starts and decide to stop on my way to the Theatre to get Adam a little something for all his hard work. The theater is packed full of proud parents, family members and faculty. I arrive at my seat next to a lovely couple, they look familiar but I can't seem to find the place where I would know them from. I watch as other students perform, they’re OK in my opinion. I am getting anxious for Adam to perform. I scan the program again to be sure I have the right slot, Adam is next. I stay in my seat to watch the beginning. He is going to be amazing. He walks out on stage with a cowboy hat on. Oh man, he looks good in it. The music starts and I can't believe it. It's boot scootin’ boogie, he is nailing the moves and working the hat. I know what order his routine is, so it makes me anxious again waiting for the next song. How he will work in contemporary next, the music blends into the next song. Seriously it's Bruno Mars just the way you are, at this point I feel like he is dancing for only me. Oh gosh, following this is hip hop, how is he going to change into hip hop? Finally I can hear the blend of songs. No freaking ‘Mo Money Mo Problems’. White boy can move. This is making me laugh, he is so into it but all I can think is back to the night at the bar. It feels like moons ago. The final piece; his modern dance, this is the toughest part and the longest part because it's from his program. The music starts to blend again. I sneak out so I can watch the end backstage. When I get to the side, I can hear Ed Sheeran Perfect. He is moving perfectly to the music. It is so emotional the song plus his performance it's touching my soul. Adam finishes strong and the audience goes nuts. He runs off stage right into my arms, kisses me quickly. He slides his hands under my butt, picks me up and carries me to his dressing room.

When we get inside, he shuts the door and kisses me again. I pull away to look at him. “Adam! That was amazing, so deep, so passionate.”

“Did you like the music?” He asks me, nodding my head. I reply, “It was like you were telling a story, our story.” Smiling back at me he says.

“I love you so much.” Adam leans in planting his lips on mine hungrily, when there is a knock on the door, Adam ignores it, holding me to him. They knock again.

“Adam, answer the door, don’t be rude.” He gives me this look like he is about to do something mischievous. Then he picks me up and carries me to go answer it. I should have known what's on the other side but I'm too excited and happy for Adam to focus on anything else. I am giggling as the door opens, it’s the couple from my seats. Adam puts me down and hugs them. They look familiar, they are his parents. How embarrassing, I sneak back into the room as Adam lets them come into the room. Has he even told them about me? I have never asked or pushed to meet them because Adam has never gone home and as far as I know they don't come to visit. As they are talking, I try to sneak out of the room from behind them. Adam turns, puts his arm around my waist, mid-conversation, pulling me to him. I whisper to him, “I'll just wait in the lobby'' Adam looks disapproving at me, then smiles and says quietly “Ready?” He interrupts his mom from talking.

“Mom Dad, this is my girlfriend Molly, also responsible for my routine and what inspired the music choices.” I extend my hand to shake theirs.

“It's a pleasure to meet you”

“Likewise, I've been dying to finally meet you.” His mother shoots Adam, a dirty look.

“We've been asking Adam to come home for a visit with you, but he never did.” Adam brushes her off saying, “Mom we've been busy. You're meeting her now, relax.”

“Yes, months later, well should we all go have dinner so dad and I can get to know your beautiful girlfriend in person?” His Mother recommends. Blushing I don't say anything, I wait for Adam to respond. I wonder why he's never asked me to go back home with him.

“Sure, let's go. Let me change and we will meet you in the lobby.” Adam answers. I go to leave with his parents, but Adam pulls me back. Adam's Mom turns around and looks at Adam with a total Mom look. As if to say, ‘what are you doing?’ Adam just smiles and closes the door.

“I don't want your parents thinking we're doing naughty things in here,” I tell him, laughing he replies, “Naughty things like what?” I push him away from me.

“Grow up, why can't I just wait with them? Are you afraid they won't like me? Is that why you've never taken me home to meet them?” Shaking his head, Adam answers.

“No, don't. It's not you, it's my Mom, she can be well, very motherly, I'm her baby boy and she still sometimes treats me like that.”

“Adam, every boy and his mom are like that, trust me. I'm used to it. I swear it won't be a competition. While she’s here she can be the caregiver and baby you and when she leaves life will be normal again besides you've told me so much about them, I feel like I already know them. Relax, get changed and I'll see you in the lobby.”

I leave the room before he can say anything or stop me. I head to the lobby to find Adam’s parents. It’s packed with parents and students; I make my way through the crowd. I finally locate them. I take a breath, walkover and say.

“Hi, Mr. and Mrs. White.”

“Hello dear, call us Jannah and Craig, please.” His Mother, I mean Jannah tells me.

“Sure. So what did you think of Adam's performance?” I ask them.

“It was certainly not what we expected, it was fun and edgy and felt so emotional,” Jannah answers first.

“It was good for sure way better than everyone else,” Craig adds, although he looks as if he has no clue.

“I know it was incredible he worked so hard on it, took dance lessons with me, and nailed the country part.” I giggle, “The musical selection, the way he flowed and blended each genre together was amazing. I'm so proud of him.” I can feel myself beaming with excitement and can’t help but boast about him. Janice cuts me off to ask.

“How come you didn't dance today?”

“I didn't audition. I'm only in my first year so I'll audition next year. They never pick first years anyways.” I reply.

“Adam tells us you're from Port Colborne, what’s it like moving from such a small town to such a big city?” She asks me, I answer politely but honestly.

“Different, it's a lot noisier and there always seems to be something going on. But I like it, so much more to do. In parts of the city, it can be beautiful. How do you enjoy coming here?” Craig answers me, “To be honest we hate the city, only came tonight for Adam.” Oh, great, it finally got awkward. What do I say now? Again Jannah has no trouble.

“We hardly see our boy now, he used to come home at least once a month but now he never does no offense dear.” Is she blaming me? Remember what my dad always says: kill them with kindness. I smile my sweetest smile.

“Oh Jannah, I'm so sorry if I've taken up all his time, now that I know I'll make sure we come visit. I would love to see where Adam grew up and we could make you and Craig dinner, what do you say?” Jannah looks at me trying to see if I'm being sincere or sarcastic, but I just keep smiling. Just as she goes to talk Adam arrives. He leans in to kiss me, but I give him this look of don't even try it, instead he slides his hand around my waist and smiles. I fill him in quickly.

“Hey Adam, we were just making plans for us to go visit your parents.” He seems surprised when he answers, “You were, were you, great, let's go eat, what does everyone feel like?” I turn to his Mother desperately wanting to please her now.

“Jannah, what kind of food do you like?”

“Something normal like a burger or whatever you want Adam. It’s your big night sweetie.” She answers.

“A burger is good. Wanna go to the Irish pub down the road? It should be calm there right now.” Adam makes the decision. We head out of the lobby to the street, Adam and I are hand in hand leading the way, his parents behind us. I feel like they’re watching our every move. Once outside Adam leans in, whispers, “Relax I can barely feel my fingers you're holding my hand so tight” I look at him and let go of his hand in an indirect way, I don’t want to do anything obvious or red flag like, as I can feel Jannah’s eye burning a hole in my back. Adam slides his arm around my waist resting his hand on my butt. I speak only loud enough for Adam to hear me and without making it obvious to his parents.

“Adam, your parents are behind me.”

“So what you're mine which means I can touch your butt if I want to.” He protests, “Not with your mom watching right now.” I protest right back. Adam rolls his eyes at me and moves his arm around my shoulder. We finally made it to the Pub. We head inside, grab a table, it is a little awkward. I sit next to Adam and across from his Dad. I scan over the menu while they catch up quickly. Our waiter comes over and we all order food and beverages. I remember my gift for Adam as there is a break in conversation, I take it out.

“Adam Congrats on your incredible performance. I got you a little something.” I say.

“Baby you don't have to get me anything.” He replies.

“I know but I wanted to, just open it.” I can’t take the anticipation anymore. Adam takes the envelope and opens it.

“Jays tickets really? Are these above the dugout? Cool thanks babe, you shouldn't have.” Adam gives me a little kiss on the cheek.

“Well you worked so hard and went out of your comfort zone and nailed it, plus they are playing the Detroit Tigers so I thought it would be fun,” I reply.

“That’s quite a gift, you got a good lady to get you ball tickets. Molly, are you a Tigers fan?” Craig seems excited about the tickets too.

“Kind of, I’m a Jay's fan for sure, it’s a long story with my family, but the short version my Grandpa Norm was a huge Tigers fan, so I always try to watch when they play each other. I prefer to play the game myself, but I don't mind watching it in person. I lose interest watching TV after a few innings if nothing exciting is happening.” I will explain. Adam and his mum start talking now in a quieter tone. I can only assume they are talking about me in some way. Craig seems to have a lot of questions for me though.

“You play baseball? What league do you play in?”

“Co Ed slow pitch, I've played my whole life, always softball. Growing up I played catcher as I got older, I played second base or left field, now I play third. I think third base is my favorite out of all of them.”

“Do you play any other sports?” he asks.

“As a kid I played everything but not anymore, now I dance and play ball. What’s your favorite sport?”

“Hockey, but I watch all of them, do you watch any other sports?” Craig says. I feel like I am one of the guys or something. This is a typical father boyfriend conversation, but I guess I do like a lot of things most men like.

“Yeah, football, same team as Adam, but I was a Steelers fan long before I met him, I fish, hike, and boat,” I say.

“You like guy activities? no wonder Adam likes you.”

“Well you know that saying anything a boy can do girls can do better” I laugh at myself, Craig chuckles too, he leans towards Adam to tell him.

“I like her Adam, she's just as you said she was.” I am blushing, I sip my drink, Adam grabs my thigh because he knows I'm trying to hide. Finally, our food shows up, I can eat and not have to speak anymore.

“So, Mom, did you know Molly makes the best desserts? You'll never believe what she learned how to make but she won't eat them because I insist on having raisins in them.” Adam boasts, “Butter tarts. Why don't you like raisins Molly?” Jannah asks me.

“No, I know I'm weird, but they just don't seem like they belong in something so sweet.” I will explain my reasoning.

“Not weird, I hate them too.” Craig winks at me.

“We will have to make some, one day. What else do you bake?” Jannah sincerely seems interested.

“Well my specialty is chocolate chip cookies. I have a secret family recipe that took me almost 3 years to get them right and cupcakes, but I actually enjoyed decorating cupcakes, cakes, cookies more than anything. Adam told me you're amazing in the kitchen which is surprising since his cooking skills are lacking a little.”

“I know I've always tried to teach him, but he just preferred to eat it, not cook it.” Jannah started talking about something from when he was a kid, I sat there eating my food, listening to Adam and his parents talk about what's going on back home, about his siblings, he talked about school and summer. He wants to see where life takes him, possibly rent somewhere, stay in Toronto but doesn't think he'll move back home. Crap we haven't even talked about this. Jannah seems shocked and upset and now I wish I wasn't here. I escape the table by saying I'm going to the restroom. I find our waiter paying for dinner, order a small dessert to the table when I return it feels even more awkward. I don't sit down, I grab my stuff; Adam looks at me like what the hell?

“Jannah, Craig it's truly been a lovely evening, unfortunately I can’t stay all evening, I’ll let you have your son all to yourself for the rest of it. Safe driving and so happy we finally got to meet. I promise we won't be strangers.” I give them both a hug goodbye, walk over to Adam who is standing up now with a less than impressed look on his face. I lean up on my tippy toes and give him a peck on the cheek. He remains unimpressed.

“How sweet, I'm glad we did this. Take care Molly see you again, Adam don't be rude walk her out.” Craig advises his son. Adam puts his hand on the swell of my back, walks me to the door of the pub. He stops just outside the door, turns to face me, he starts to talk but I kiss him first.

“Call me when you're done, I love you.” I try to sneak around him to start walking home, Adam puts up his arm and catches me.

“Not so fast, what's up with you?”

“Nothing, I just think you guys need to talk without me here and your mom will love having you all to herself. Which will give me brownie points with her for the future.” I tell him. Adam rolls his eyes at me, throwing his head back in defeat.

“I’ll call you as soon as they leave, I love you.”

“I love you too.” I throw my arms around his neck as he cups my butt, laughing as he leans down planting his lips on mine, we pull away after a moment, and I steal one more quick kiss before I turn and walk away.

It's almost 10 pm and I still haven't heard from Adam. I started to worry a little bit, so I texted him.

Me: Hey about to fall asleep just checking in on you.

Almost instantly I get a reply from Adam.

Adam: Sorry parents came back to my house. They just left. Wait up for me I'll be right over.

Me: I'm fading fast, use your key.

I open my eyes, look at the clock. It's 7 AM, but Adam's not here. I grab my phone. I have 5 new messages.

Lacey: Hey Babe how was the showcase? Toonie Tuesday you in this week?

I decided to reply before reading the other messages. I can’t wait to tell her I met Adam’s parents and the comments about staying in Toronto for the summer, did he say that because of me?

Me: Adam was incredible, I met his parents, that was interesting, breakfast this morning?

Okay, Mister Adam let’s see why you are not in my bed.

Adam: Sorry Babe guys want to have a drink, celebrate me being awesome I'll be a bit, don’t wait up. I’ll let myself in when I get there. So, 1 drink = shots, save me. . . Molly, you awake. Babe I want you . . . all of you all the time.

Well that explains where he is. Or where I think he is anyways. One new voicemail from 3 AM ah man this should be good. I call my voicemail.

“Baby my Molly why aren't you awake? I need to tell you something. You're the best like the real-time best. I was thinking you know sometimes when you think you get a great idea. (I can hear muffled noises in the background) My future wife, you wanna say hi? I know she's smoking hot. NO absolutely not. Molly the guys wanna do not cool things with you, well like I’d be cool if it was me doing those things but like not them you know. One second I need to go kick Tyler.”

Adam clearly is hammered; this is quite funny to listen to. I wonder if he knows he didn't hang up. All I can hear is what sounds like running, laughing and muffled voices.

“Hello? Are you there? Why is your face on my phone? Your face I love your face. Let's rent a place together this summer. Maybe like forever well one day we can buy a mansion but like summertime I told my mom I wanna live with you. She thinks you say no. What are you doing? Are you even listening to me? Hello? Shots, let's get them into my belly.”

CLICK.

Oh my freaking God he will not remember. I save the message so I can play it for sober Adam. Laughing, my phone beeps.

Lacey: Why are you awake so early? Breakfast @ 9 at sunset grill?

Me: See you there I roll out of bed and head in the shower. When I get back to my room, I throw on yoga pants and a hoodie, messy bun and sneakers. I decide to text Adam before I leave for breakfast.

Me: Good morning sunshine when you re enter the world of the living, let me know I love you.

I leave my dorm, head to the grill for breakfast with Lacey. We sit, order our breakfast. I tell her all about the showcase of how amazing Adam was, how I finally met his parents, how his dad loves me, how I'm unsure about his mom, but that I think she'll come around when she realizes I'm not here to steal her son. Then I let her listen to Adam’s message.

“Oh my God well that's hilarious he's not going to remember that at all,” Lacey confirms what I’ve been thinking.

“I know I'll play it for him so he can relive it, but I can watch his reaction. I wonder if he was serious?” I ask Lacey, hoping she will give me her opinion.

“Well you said he was talking to his parents about it at dinner that's why you left and you know what they say about booze it's the truth serum or liquid courage maybe both in Adam's case.” She voices her thoughts. But I have to ask, “Do you think it's too soon for us to move in together?”

“Seriously? You moved in with Jeremy after 3 months and you think 9 months is too soon?” She puts it into perspective for me. But still, I have a rebuttal, “Well I knew Jeremy for years before we actually dated so I feel like it is different. I have only known Adam for the school year.”

“Do you love him?” she asks.

“Yes” I answer plain and simple.

“Did you not tell me before you feel like he's the one you'll grow older with?”

“Yes but,” I try to make up some reason but she cuts me off.

“Nothing if it's meant to be, just let it be, don't worry when the time comes, you'll know the answer.”

“I do want to live with him or at least be close to him during summer. Maybe the same house, different rooms, just in case we need space.” I say. We finish our food, leave the restaurant.

“Don’t stress Molly, it’ll all work out, call me later,” Lacey reassures me. We hug good-bye. It's beautiful out, I head home to grab my rollerblades, I decide to go to the Lakeshore and roller blade. It helps me clear my head. I try not to stress, that was a drunken message Adam could possibly regret what he said.

Beep I look for my phone through the mess of books I have on my bed from studying for finals. It’s Adam, he must have finally woken up.

Adam: Hey, I’m alive, sorry for the texts and apparently the call. I just got out of bed; do you want to come over?

Me: No worries, it was entertaining this morning to listen to the message. How much do you remember from last night?

Adam: Enough to know we didn’t do anything too stupid. Sorry I bailed on you.

Me: I’m glad you had fun, I’m studying for finals so I’ll pass on coming over, but I’ll see ya at school tomorrow too I don't hear back from him but I figure he either fell back asleep or went to shower. I have finals this week in my lecture classes, so I really need to study. I looked up from my book and it's dinner time. I am starving, I open my door and nearly run right into Adam. He doesn't even say anything, he just starts kissing me while walking me back into my room, he slams the door behind him. I pull away from him to ask.

“What's wrong?”

“Nothing, can't I come here and kiss my girlfriend?” He answers me but his voice is different, and his kiss isn’t loving, it is desperate like he’s making up for something. I sternly say, “Not like that you can't. What are you doing here? I told you I have to study for finals.''

“Nothing, I missed you, I want to see you. So I came over.” It’s like he is pleading with me, but I’m not buying it.

“Nope, try again, what’s up? Just tell me. Now.” I move away from him and sit at my desk so Adam has to sit alone on my bed. I cross my arms, I’m sure Adam can tell by my facial expression that I am not impressed. Why is he here, he looks like shit.

“Did we talk on the phone last night?” He blurts out.

“Nope you left me a voicemail, it was mostly rubbish, although you did mention something about moving in together and your mom thinking I wouldn’t want to,” I tell him and he whips his head in my direction before starting to pace back and forth in my room.

“Adam this can’t all be because of some stupid voicemail, what happened last night, what aren’t you telling me?” Adam sits back down, and hangs his head in his hands while he speaks in a low voice.

“I was telling the truth, my mom doesn't think you'll move with me, she thinks it's too soon, and thinks we should wait until next summer. She's afraid if we break up it will be a nightmare, but then I told her you are mine forever and we got into a fight. She thinks I haven't lived enough, and says she hardly knows you because I won't let her.” Wow, that was unexpected, but now it makes sense why he's acting this way. I get up and go sit next to him, “ Do you want to get into this all right now?” I ask. Adam falls back on my bed with a heavy sigh.

“This is so fucked up” I lay down beside him with my head propped up on my hand so I can see him. I try to console him. Adam doesn’t look at me when I respond.

“What’s fucked up? Wanting to live with me?”

“Everything I said in the message, there was more than just talking about living together wasn’t there?” I know he needs to hear how I truly feel, all the things I have been too afraid to tell him, all the things I’ve talked to Lacey about. I take a quiet deep breath hoping he doesn’t notice then I just start talking.

“Adam, I will forever be your always and you will be mine, because although I'm not ready today to be your wife I want to believe that someday I will be. As for your mom we will have to make sure we go visit back home, we will invite them to come to our apartment, condo, loft or whatever we find. We’ll even find a two bedroom so they can stay the weekend and she can get to know me better, then she will quickly see you and me, we are perfect for each other. As for living, she probably just doesn't know enough about your life here in Toronto and from what you told me, you don't bring girls home like ever, you don’t talk like you 're a troublesome teen, so she is probably just trying to look out for you. That’s what Mothers do best. But I promise you she will come around. Adam, I love you, no one is going to take that away from us.” Adam all of a sudden props himself up on his arms, face to face, smiling at me. I know he heard every detail that was said, but I will ask anyway.

“What’s wrong?”

“Do you realize what you just said?” Adam answers with a question, I giggle as I reply, “Of course I do.” Smiling from ear to ear at Adam I know by spilling my true feelings about the whole thing, he is instantly feeling better. He must have really thought I wouldn’t move in with him.

“So we are really going to do this? You are sure about this Molly, you want to move in together?” Still surprised he asks just to be sure.

“Yes, a thousand times yes,” I answer instantly. Adam embraced me into a bear hug rolling me on top of him. I straddle his body and push myself up so I can see his face. He can’t control the excitement in his tone.

“So when do you want to go apartment shopping?” I smile down at him, “Well I have to move out of residence at the end of school, so like soon because I only have two and a half weeks, do you know when your lease is up?”

“We're doing this, do you want to call your parents or something?” Again Adam answers with a question. I shake my head as I say, “No, I'm 26, I don’t need their approval, and yes I am one hundred percent positive I want this. So if you are serious about it then we should start the process. Things like this take time, we need to get approved for financing, a background check, references, and come up with first and last rent.”

“How do you know so much?” He asks.

“Well I have lived on my own before, like not in residence so I know a little bit about what has to happen before we can get a place. But I have finals this week and next, and I don’t want to stress out about finding an apartment, packing and moving when I should be studying or practicing. But the first thing you need to figure out is when you have to be out of your room at the house.”

“I already know, I have to be out at the end of June, so if you want to move in after schools out, we will have a month to look for a place.” Smiling at each other Adam sits up, I wrap my arms around his neck, he nuzzles into my chest for a moment before I hop off of him. We have work to do. I move over to my desk, grab a pad of paper and a pen and ask Adam.

“Alright, let's get this started. What do you think is an absolute must for our future living space?”

“Well you said 2 bedrooms so my parents could come stay for the weekend. What about you?”

“A balcony, I don’t want to feel claustrophobic, and I prefer open concepts like the living room and kitchen for the same reason, especially if we are high up in a building. Any preference on location?” I replied. Adam sits for a minute thinking, the answers.

“Well, I feel like we should be close enough to the school that we can take transit without having it take hours.”

“Yeah I agree, I have the car but if we don’t have the same schedule we’ll need transit. Speaking of my car, I would like the building to have a parking garage so I know my car is relatively safe.” We are making such progress already it feels good.

“Okay, so the list is looking good so far, miss professional what haven’t we covered yet?” Adam asks me, “Size?” I say. Adam gives me this goofy grin, I shake my head.

“Of the living space, where did your head go eh?” Adam laughs.

“Well, I guess size will probably depend on our budget?” He asks.

“True, so what is our monthly budget for rent and expenses?” I ask him back.

“Well I pay about $500 for my room, plus about $250 for utilities, but we all had to pitch in to get internet and cable for the house on top of that, so say like $800 a month is what I pay now, I could see if I could push it up to a grand. But I would have to get a job for sure for the summer to save and pay more. What about you?” Adam explains.

“Well I think we will both have to get jobs for the summer to ensure we can keep paying that. I have money saved so I can pay about the same amount I’m sure.” I say. What Adam doesn't know is I am collecting Jeremy’s life insurance, plus the sale of our house from Orangeville, I definitely have a nice cushion for now, but since I haven’t told Adam about Jeremy yet I don’t think now is the time to say ‘Hey I actually get a monthly deposit because my husband died.’ So I’ll just call it my savings for now.

“Okay so I think we pretty much covered everything, we have about a $2,000 limit for rent, utility and expenses, we should make sure the lease goes in both names and we split everything down the middle.” Adam agrees and flops back on my bed with a big sigh of relief. I stand up to go jump on him when my stomach makes the loudest growl ever. I look over at the clock, it’s 8 PM. I'm starving, I realize I didn’t eat dinner because Adam showed up when I was going to leave.

“Adam, do you think we can go grab some dinner?” I ask.