Academy Of Love

As I stand here on the balcony of my resort suite, overlooking a beautiful blue ocean, a slight breeze is in the air enough to take the wretched heat away. I look down at myself in disbelief that I am once again wearing a wedding dress. With my wedding less than an hour from now, my life replaying the last 3 years in my head. I never thought I would find love again. Let alone get married. I didn’t expect it to find me when I wasn't looking for it. I was determined to have a new life and focused on returning to reality as a new person.

I lie down on the 2-person lounge chair in my beautiful white wedding gown. I watch as it blows in the breeze. At my first wedding, I had a long flow strapless chiffon dress, with a sweetheart neck, baby doll style, and some simple beadwork under the bust. This time I wanted something different, but now that I lay here, soaking up the sun, I realize this dress is not so different, it is long enough to hit the floor, and it still flows in the wind, but this time I went with eyelet lace, shoulder straps, a round low cut neckline, and the same sort of baby doll style. It reminds me of a free spirit, I got my hair done in what I would call a hippie style, it’s all up and braided and the braids are all twisted into a bun. I put hair chalk in one strand to represent something blue; I am wearing a subtle floral headpiece with Japanese cherry blossoms. As I relax, I can’t help but let my mind wander back to when it all began 3 years ago.

I could not tell if I was coming or going most days, I had moved back in with my parents and had completely given up on life. This wasn't the way my story was supposed to happen. I had a plan, goals, dreams, and a future, but life sometimes goes differently. Sometimes life throws you a giant curveball, just to see how much you and your heart can handle and in my case, it almost broke. I was 25 wild and free. Only at this specific time, I had no idea what to do with my life. I couldn't continue working at the resort or stay in Orangeville. I had lost my entire reason for existing. As I mentioned, I moved back in with my parents in good old Port Colborne, a small town where everyone knows everyone and knows each other's business. So, when I tried to go out or try something new, there was always someone who would give me a look of pity or a whisper about what happened. Then one day out of nowhere I woke up determined to start over, to find a new calling. So, I made a list of all the things that made me happy:

Creating- I'll become an artist and sell my work, but I just couldn't create from a positive place. Everything ended up having scribbles on it because I would get upset or frustrated.

Food or baking- I love to cook bake and design cakes. At first, this was going great. A few friends ordered some stuff but then I started being too hard on myself and realized I am only one person, and this is more of a hobby.

Then it was the same thing with photography, jewelry making, and home décor, so I decided I needed the social interaction of strangers, people who didn't know my story, and who I could start over with, so I joined a dance class outside town. At first, I enjoyed how easy it was to get lost in the music and routines. Then as time went on, I realized I was kind of good. I've found my new passion, my new adventure in life. The next thing I knew I was applying to dance Academies anywhere I could. I wanted to dance or to help athletes and/or professional dancers, finally after what felt like forever. I checked the mailbox and there was an acceptance letter from the Toronto School of Dance.