Chapter 54

“Ma’am Ficarro, may I have your permission to intervie—”

“Y-Yes, of course,” I quickly told the interviewers who smiled quickly.

I normally turned to the person behind me and then he smiled hard. “Please excuse me, Mr. Arcus,” I boldly said then he turned his back and faced many cameras.

I force myself to focus on those who ask me about what happened to me in Spain, I feel like someone is staring at me. I just smile and nod to make me look normal in front of them.

“Ma’am, if you don’t mind, ahm, here please,” a tissue interviewer handed me.

“O-Oh! T-Thank you,” I smiled then wiped my forehead down to my cheek slowly.

It’s just amazing because it’s so cold around me. As time went on, more and more interviewers came, fortunately Cyron accompanied me so the cameras went to him. I simply looked around, I could no longer see a trace of him. Again, I felt nervous again, I couldn’t help but be paranoid every time a male businessman passed by.

“Hey!”

“Huh!” I quickly turned to Cyron who was holding my waist.

“Are you okay? You were stupid before?” it asked me.

I noticed that the formerly gathering interviewer who had just been in front of us was gone. I looked at it coldly and then smirked.

“C-Can I go home now?” my poor question.

It frowned, strange because he didn’t even notice, or maybe I just made a mistake with what I saw before, maybe I didn’t really talk to him.

“I’m sorry but, we still have two hours before they open the gate. If you want to rest I’ll split—”

“N-No, it’s okay. Let’s go,” I said.

I clung to his arm and deliberately pressed my side to his because I felt like I was going to faint. I had to fake a smile everywhere so that not only would I be noticeable, I also took that opportunity to find out where Zaffiro was positioned. But I saw no trace of him, until we sat in our seats I did not see him.

I pinched my finger hard to regain my sanity. I could feel the heat hissing into my eyes. I was almost mad at the thought of whether what I had seen before was true, or maybe even myself was feeling guilty. I simply bent down and picked up my cell phone. I put it under so that others would not notice. Trembling I searched for Lana’s number, yes Right! Lana is the only one I can count on.

9:35 pm.

I don’t know if my kids are asleep, but I hope not, I hope he still plays. I took a deep breath and then executed a plan. This is the only way because my thoughts can’t stop. My gut feeling is too strong.

Lana:

Where are you? Are you with the kids?

I waited for its answer but a few minutes later I received no reply. The more nervous I was, the more I sweated.

“Shit!” I’m weak cheap.

I noticed Mama A’s look, but I ignored her. I looked back and forth at the speaker and waited for an answer from Lana.

Lana:

Wake up! Please! Lana help! Go to my kids’ room, take them to the condo, please Lana! Zaffiro was here, he already knew. Please Lana.

My feet are shaking, like I cried but I couldn’t because of the people around me.

Lana:

For the last time Lana, run away from the two children. Let’s meet on Emerald Street. Please Lana, I beg you, replay oh.

I carefully wiped away the tears I was about to shed. Look around anywhere and suddenly smile at someone just so I don’t notice. A few minutes passed but still nothing. I decided to stand up and say goodbye to someone just to call. I quickly passed what Cyron and I had passed earlier, there were a few people there walking.

“Lana! Shit! Answer my call!” I was weak as I walked.

“Where are our children, Veron?”

I closed my eyes tightly when I heard his voice again, I just wanted to knock on the cell phone I was holding just to stop the noise my brain was making. I quickly went to the parking lot and got in the car. I couldn’t stop shedding the tears that I always wanted to cry, then I wanted to release. This time, I feel like I have no ally. No one wants to take sides.

I quickly wiped the tears that had spread down my cheeks and pulled over the car. But that’s how depressed I was because the gate was closed. I became even more angry and annoyed. The guard with a flashlight greeted me because it was dark in that part. I turned off the light in my car and then opened the window for him.

“Ma’am, I’m sorry—”

“I have an emergency so please, open the gate,” I said calmly while digging at my feet.

“Eleve later—”

“Sir! I have an emergency! The children need me, if you can just open that gate so I can leave!” annoyed I said as the nails pressed hard on the steering wheel.

I just clasped one hand and before he could speak I quickly pulled his collar into the window to make it stick. Chasing asked him to look at me and pressed the gun to his cheek.

“I can fvcking kill you right now if you don’t want to open the damn gate!” I shouted loudly then pushed him away causing him to catch his breath.

“Now. Let me out of here if you don’t want to die,” I said firmly.

Simultaneously with my firing the gun was the opening of the gate. Annoyed, I turned it around and smiled.

“Thank you and fvck you!” I quickly pulled the car over, I didn’t care if I was charged for what I was doing. I had to escape the kids to the mansion.

I don’t know if I ever have a brain disease because of the various words I hear in my brain. The question of my children and the question of their father. My vision became increasingly blurred, tears welling up as I continued to figure out how to escape the children.

“You have no right to my kids. No Zaffiro. We will die first before you touch them.”

I felt a combination of fear, nervousness and anger when the gate opened, it was 10:10 in the evening, I was sure the children were asleep. I quickly stopped the car away from the mansion so they wouldn’t notice me. I quickly took off the sandals I was wearing and ran to the back of the mansion, I didn’t care what I looked like anymore, I just needed to get them out of here. I stopped a bit when I touched the doorknob, it was open so I could enter freely.

The motion was fast but I quietly climbed the second floor. The surroundings are quiet, I’m just covered ng mouth because of the sob I could not stop. I could see the room where my children were. I carefully opened the door and then saw two children asleep. The sob I wanted to let out more was suppressed.

“I-Inah, V-Van, let’s go,” I called softly.

I patted them and forced them to sit on the bed. Van woke up quickly and then stared at me carefully.

“Mama—”

“Sshhh! Quite V-Van, Come on, put on your slippers,” I hurried to him.

“Inah, I-Inah, wake up, Mama is here,” I said in tears and couldn’t stop sobbing.

Because of that, she woke up and rolled her eyes. “Mama? Sleep,” she said sleepily.

“Where are we going?” sleepily Van says already wearing slippers.

“Let’s go, promise Mama that you’ll be quiet,” I whispered firmly and they quickly nodded.

I held both of their hands and then slowly left the room, there was still no one and they looked like they were asleep. I told them to just shut up and cover their mouths. They just nodded while staring at me unable to adjust themselves. When we got down I was so nervous that I let them out the back door of the mansion.

“Faster!” I shouted so they quickly followed seemingly confused.

The world seemed to slow down, I could see the car but something was wrong. I forced the two children to run to the car. I was about to open the door but I was so annoyed because it was locked. I just kicked the car because I left the key in their room. I was completely hopeless, I faced my children who were drowsy and staring at me, I knelt down and then gently caressed their cheeks.

“F-Forgive me mama ah? I’m so guilty of you… F-Forgive me,” I sobbed.

I kissed them hard on the cheek, they just stared at me and Inah nodded slightly.

“Let’s play, do you like that? Mama’s playing?” I asked as they both smiled.

I quickly wiped away my tears and then forced myself to smile at them as well. “Yes, I like games,” she replied then I stood up.

I looked at the gate, it would take ten minutes if we were to run that from here, I had to convince them.

“O-Okay like this. H-Hold on to m-mama’s hand, okay? H-Hold on tight, don’t let go of mama’s hand. L-Let’s run there, can we?” I asked weakly and sobbed again.

“Are you crying, Mama?” Van asked as I asked.

“No. Let’s go, hold on to mam—”

“Papa!” Inah smiled.

I quickly cooled to where I was standing. I could clearly see the eyes of the two children behind me staring.

“Papa will get join us to ran away?” Van asked with a smile.

I could clearly see a familiar shadow from in front of me. Gone. I’m late.

Trembling prevailed in me as I faced it, nervous and forced to look into his eyes.

“Veron, where are you taking my children?” astonishment of it.

I quickly grabbed the two kids and hid right behind me. I circled it tearfully and then laughed out loud.

“Y-You don’t have children Z-Zaffiro, they’re not your children!” sobbing I promise.

I could feel their tight grip on my back. I had already heard Inah’s faint cries, so I supported them to back offslowly But a smirk I received here that made my hair stand on end even more. I couldn’t help but be afraid of him especially with the dark aura of his appearance.

“Veron? What’s going on here?” Nikasha asked loudly hugging herself.

I quickly backed away to the right where away from the two of them, Zaffiro was still standing staring at my two children.

“Stop Veron. I will never let you run away with my child,” he said calmly but firmly as he slowly approached us.

But what scared me more was the loss of the two children’s hands in my hand. I quickly looked at it but it was too late, my two children were already being held by Lucas and he was quickly greeted by Nikasha who was confusedly staring at us.

“L-Lucas, give me the an—”

“Not Lucas. Don’t give up my children,” he said loudly, causing my head to heat up.

Chasing the breath I went to the habit where they were Lucas holding the children. I could clearly see from afar another stare staring at us. But before I could hold Van’s hand Zaffiro quickly pulled me into him.

“Let go of me!” It quickly pulled me away from the children I could hear the cries. “L-Let go of me—”

“You stop!” its angry utterance.

I almost stared and backed away because of what I could see. The obvious veins that want to come out of its neck, at the same time as it catches its breath, are the formation of tears in its eyes.

“Look at yourself! Do you still know yourself Veron?” he said sharply as I shook.

No words came out of my mouth, I fainted every time I heard his voice.

“V-Veron, I-I want to be mad at you. I love you so much! Why? Why do you have to hide my children? Am I look stupid? Huh?! Am I that stupid for—”

“Just don’t know!” I pushed him. “You don’t know how I want to tell you the truth Zaffiro! Y-You don’t know how happy I am because one of my dreams that was impossible before has come true! Y-You don’t know … How much I s-sacrificed, Zaffiro. I gave up everything for you, I drove away those people who were ready to truly love me just for you! But what?! What?! I feel like you just used me… After you use me that to others!” full of anger and I don’t care if others hear me.

I could clearly see how it shook and stared at me. “N-No Veron, no. You didn’t listen to me, you didn’t ask me if everything you saw was correct, you never asked me what happened that time,” he said, shaking his head. “You never let me explain, you didn’t listen to me Veron, I missed that, because you said you wanted to rest, you wanted to be free,” its weak defense.

“I missed it all. But what I just don’t understand is that you didn’t tell me the truth. You didn’t tell me we had a child, Veron. I-I have the right to be hurt and angry, that’s my child. You don’t know how much it hurts me when I see you and Cyron, my two children. You don’t know the feeling that I’m looking at you from afar while Cyron is doing the things I’m supposed to be doing. I’m supposed to be Veron, but You deprived me of being a father… So tell me, don’t I have the right to be hurt?”

For the first time, I saw him cry again, his face was sore and his collar was soaking wet from the tears that had accumulated. I just sobbed as I stared at him, the father of my children. Crying and slowly kneeling in front of me. I close my eyes tightly when I feel his hand caress my hand and gently kiss you.

“I-I want to hear the truth from you Veron, please tell me the truth… Please,” he begged, still on his knees.

My children re-registered in my brain, their question when their father would come home, what his name was, what his job was and if they would ever see him again. I was very selfish, I felt the pain and it doubled when I heard Zaffiro’s voice, what he said and add what I read in his letter… Four years ago.

“I know you know the truth, you’re Zaffiro, if you can? Don’t ask me anymore if they’re your children or not!” I shout here.

I left immediately in front of him, I couldn’t bear to see him begging because I remember, I was the one doing that to him. I can’t even look back at the father of my children because I can’t yet, every time I see him I just want to disappear from the world because my sins are killing me even more. When I got to the living room I saw my two children Lucas hugging Inah and Van just quietly next to his grandmother, Zaffiro’s mother. I was almost overwhelmed because of the people watching me who I knew I had hurt and failed, especially Zaffiro’s family.

“Care to explain those things?” Nikasha’s voice pointing to the papers scattered on the table.

Lucas just looked at me, carrying my two children. They were sleepy to obey and I don’t know what they said to my children because they were able to obey like that. I did nothing, I just swallowed and then sat on the blank sofa. I noticed uncle Zack adjusting his seat and staring at me.

“We badly want your side, Veron. If I were in my son’s situation, I would be angry, so we have to know the story,” he calmly told me but I feel like he’s more scary now.

Though my hands were shaking I tried to adjust to the situation, remembering the times I loved Zaffiro so much until they were formed. Your happy life has become chaotic.

“S-Six years ago, we’re dating, I mean, we meet often but we don’t have a relationship, I don’t want to ask him because I know he’s busy with his work. He gave me a ring, but I don’t know what for. H-How many times did something happen to us, then the month of June, the doctor told me I was pregnant, how many times I called him but he didn’t answer. nEvery time I asked his secretary, he always said that Zaffiro was not there. The day I gave Aunt Summer’s order, I went to her office, I saw her with other woman, I didn’t know anything, but I remembered that I was pregnant then and he was your father.” I immediately wiped away my tears and smiled bitterly then resumed what I didn’t want to say.

“I left, but I was bleeding at that time, when I woke up Lana came up to me, she convinced me to tell you the truth, but I immediately processed my paperwork to go with Mama A. I didn’t. know what I do non, I-I’m afraid to admit to you because I don’t like mess, maybe mess, so I left, I-I didn’t listen to his explanation because I couldn’t,” I whispered in the last part before my tears finally flowed again.

I just wanted to work then, I chose Zaffiro because I was hoping I might still have a chance, but it did happen, that I don’t know if it was the right decision. I could clearly see the shock in everyone, even Lana wasn’t looking at me and it looked like even though she knew my whole secret she didn’t say anything. She waited for this opportunity.

Uncle Zack averted his eyes from me, while his wife just stared at me and forced a smile. I can no longer look at others especially as my embarrassment increases, especially in Lana’s family.

“Let’s all go to sleep. It’s a good night to talk about this and you two and Zaffiro should talk, I really trust you Veron, I know you’re having a hard time too, but Zaffiro needs your explanation, your side, both of you should talk about this, fix this, I don’t want to lost my son again, never. Goodnight.”

The smile it gave me caused my brain to mess up.

Lost his son.

In an instant, everyone in the living room disappeared, only me and Zaffiro were in front of me as if I was asking if we should talk. I noticed its erection and its slowly approaching me. He slowly knelt down in front of me and his tears were shedding again.