Ch164 A Mother’s Protection

Just as she started to feel the sun lull her to sleep, her father came into the bathroom in his wolf form. He knew Sasa still felt more comfortable around him like this, especially when she was so vulnerable. He pawed the shower off, then pressed his gigantic silver head into hers. Distantly she reached up and scratched an ear. She wasn’t crying anymore, but she still felt hollow and empty like there was a black whole inside her and she was about to implode from the force of it.

*You need to fight this Sasa,* Sköll’s words said in her mind.

*I can’t, there’s nothing left, he was everything. Even if I do find him, I can’t get him back. He may as well be dead.* Sasa said back.

Sköll nudged her again, *You came back, little one.*

Sasa showed him the images of Fenris trying to explain what she was, the sharing of her blood to awaken her memories, the pain of turning back, her death from getting her memories back. She had never told them she knew she had died, but she did. *Only this time, Fenris isn’t a freak of nature that can’t die, and I don’t have any of his blood. He’s trapped as a human until he grows old and dies.*

*I am truly sorry little one, I had not realized how difficult it had been on you to return.* Sköll said after he soaked in all Sasa showed him. *However, you cannot let that stop you. If you cannot use the need to protect Fenris and keep him from dying too young, then you need to think of the children. You chose to adopt Astrid and Ragnar, then you chose to bring the other one back here. The children need you. I should not have to point out Leo is being looked over by Marith. She thinks the lad is a hunter.*

Sköll had barely finished that sentence before Sasa leapt to her feet and grabbed a dress from her closet and pulled it on before she stormed out of the room and went to Leo’s side. As she approached, she felt the tension and felt fear from her son. Using the speed only she had, she growled venomously and shoved Marith away from her child.

“He is mine and you will not harm him,” Sasa growled dangerously.

“How do you know we can trust him and he isn’t just leading the hunters here?” Marith growled back.

Sasa stood in front of Leo as a shield as she stared Marith down, “Because he suffered just as I did. The man in white starved me, which is surprisingly hard to do, then shoved him at me. I nearly killed him myself and I had to leave him in the hands of another I had to trust because I couldn’t trust myself. And why, because he stood with Fenris and I. He could have chosen to turn on us and stay where he knew what to expect, but he didn’t. He chose us and the unknown and the possible death that came with it. I lost my mate; I will not lose my son!”

“You mean this thing is your son as well? How many strays are you going to bring home?” Marith demanded.

“As I said before, if you do not like how I run my household, you know where the doors are, Marith. And yes, he is my son, the one I lost,” Sasa said as she turned around and cut Leo’s hand again so the smell of his blood hit the air.

Leo flinched at the sudden movement, but didn’t move. He had been nervous about coming into a house full of vampires, but hadn’t expected Sasa would have to fight them. “Sasa,”

Sasa growled to silence him. She grabbed his hand and rubbed some of the blood on hers before she licked the wound closed again. Then she stuck the bloody hand in Marith’s face. “He is mine, you will not harm him,”

Marith looked Leo over again and gave a happy smirk. “I thought he just looked like Fenris because you’re a tad face blind and got confused,”

“I’m not that face blind!” Sasa protested as he checks flushed with embarrassment.

“If it acts anything close to its father, good luck keeping him alive,” Marith teased as she nodded her acceptance of the situation and started to walk off again.

The smell of Leo’s blood attracted the other vampires, Bernard, and Ryuji at the forefront. Sasa flashed her eyes dangerously as she continued to shield Leo. Bernard may have slapped her around earlier, but not now. The most unexpected was Astrid dashing into the room calling papa, until Leo turned to look at her and she stopped and froze in her tracks.

“Mama, who is that? Is that our big brother? He looks like papa,” Astrid asked as she walked up cautiously.

Sasa buried her protective anger and smiled at Astrid, “Yes, luv, this is Leo. He is your older brother. Leo this is your younger sister. Cranky pants who just left is Marith. She’s a friend of your father’s. The other cranky looking one is your elder brother, Ragnar. He means well, he just acts prickly because he thinks that means he’s tough. The frilly Englishman, Bernard, and the black-haired guy, Ryuji, are Fenris’s children. They’re also friends of your father,”

“Isn’t that wired? Don’t vampires make lovers,” Leo began to ask, but Sasa covered his mouth.

“And nothing more is being said on that topic, ever. I am Fenris’s only lover, ever, end of story,” Sasa teased gently.

Bernard glared disapprovingly, “You can’t keep talking about him like he’s alive and make it all better,”

“I never once said he was dead,” Sasa said calmly as she stroked Astrid’s hair. “All I said was what I did I had to do to protect him. Fenris is alive, and I will go to him as soon as the children are settled,” looking back at Leo, then at Idmu, Sasa continued, “And the raven-haired ladies are Elder Idmu and her great granddaughters Rose and Mary. Elder Idmu is also the twin’s sire,”

Rose came over and ruffled Leo’s hair, “You do look like Fenris, it’s kind of funny,”

“Hopefully you’re not as stoic as he is,” Marry teased.

“Rose and Mary are cool, mama. They play with us a lot when aunt Idmu watches us,” Astrid added as she looked up at Sasa.

“Aunt Idmu?” Sasa asked curiously.

“Yeah, when Astrid asked how Grandmother Idmu was related to you we explained she was Dagrim’s child and Little Astrid started calling her Aunt Idmu. So technically we’re cousins,” Mary added, grinning at Leo warmly.

“And we’re cousins too,” Astrid said playfully tugging on Rose.

“Yeah, we are. Hey, so you’re also my Aunt Sasa,” Rose said teasingly to Sasa.

Sasa was just smiling happily. She had never gotten around to figuring out how she fit in with the scary water witch of old. As Sasa thought that Idmu walked over and hugged Sasa deeply.

“Know this child, other than Narua, I’ve called no other woman my sister,” Idmu said softly to Sasa.

Sasa hugged her back, “Thank you Idmu. And thank you for watching my children for me,”

“Dagrim left me no choice in the matter, but they are good children. They made it pleasant. I know you’re nervous around me, but I really have a soft spot for children,” Idmu teased.

Another set of arms wrapped themselves around Sasa as Idmu held her, they belonged to Rose. Sasa let her.

“Oh Sasa, whenever you leave us like this you always come back more heart broken than before. It will be okay. I worried if you’d survive when we first heard about you, so timid and young. Now however I know you are strong and have overcome great things, you will overcome this as well. And we are all here for you or not, no matter if our fangs are shown or not,”

Sasa wanted to cry at Rose’s words. She tried not to, but Astrid and Mary joined the hug too.

“It’s okay mama. You’re sad because you don’t have papa. Rag said our other mama was sad when da died. She’d cry sometimes without knowing it, or just fall down crying and wouldn’t move until Rag or I needed her,”

“Shut up, Astrid,” Ragnar growled. He had walked closer just to be closer to Sasa like he did to comfort her in his own awkward way.

A few tears escaped Sasa as she hugged her daughter carefully. She wanted to hug her with all her strength, but knew she couldn’t. “It’s alright, luv. I think I know why grandpa Sköll told me why Marith was being mean to Leo. I just need to keep moving. I don’t even think Marith was really even being mean to Leo now that I think about it,”

“I was if he really is a vampire hunter,” Marith called from the other room.

Sasa shook her head, “He’s not... Are you?”

Leo looked taken aback by the question, “No, why would I be?”

“It’s a really difficult thing to discover the world you used to live in was a shallow lie. Some people can’t accept it and fall back on the lie they’re used to because it is familiar and safe. After being with me in that horrible place, I could see where deciding you don’t believe I’m your mother is easier. You could go back to Dr. White and apologize. The evil man would enjoy it too,” Sasa growled the last bit.