CHAPTER 34

Today is her 6th year death anniversary.

The hardest part of losing someone is not the footsteps of goodbye. It's the aftermath, it's learning how to live without them.

I bought her favorite white tulips.

Pag dating ko sa puntod si Ate hindi na ako nagulat dahil may pink na tulips naka patong. Galing na siguro si Sandro dito.

"Hi, ate"

Its been 6 yrs, 6 long years without you and until now, it pain me. I don't know if I'll be able to forgive myself.

"I miss you so much"

"Ate"

"Do I deserve to live?"

"After what happend to you, I don't think I deserve it, ate"

I am left here wishing to hear your voice one last time.

"They told me that it would be alright, but I feel this isn't true. The only thing that would make me feel better if I was there with you"

"Stop blaming yourself"

"Sandro"

I can feel my heart beating so fast. Its been 3 yrs since the last time I saw him.

"How have you been?"

"Bumalik kana pala" he added.

I didn't answer him, I just stared at him. He still the same, Sandro. Napaka cold pa din ng dating nya.

"When will stop blaming yourself?"

I walked out. Im afraid.

He grabbed my hand "Let's talk"

I push him, not that hard. "I have nothing to say, Sandro"

I don't know what's in his eyes. Because it makes me want to keep coming back to him.

"Please, let me go"

"Stop running away, Allison. Do you think she's happy? To see you acting this way? Hindi paba sapat ang tatlong talon?"

I cried. "You know nothing, Sandro. How can you look at me like that as if nothing happend? You lost her because of me, Sandro!"

"Yes! I hated you, seeing you pain my heart. I want to take revenge allison but for what? Hindi mabubuhay si Addison kahit ilang beses mo pang saktan ang sarili mo! Damn it"

He grabbed my wrist and stared at my cut. "Why do you keep torturing yourself? Walang may gusto ng nangyari, Allison"

"Stop hurting yourself please"

I saw pain in his eyes. I'm really sorry, Sandro. I want to stay with you that time but I can't.

"Stop doing this, Allison. Im begging you"

I remember when I cut my wrist I almost died. It just hit me when I saw my mom crying everyday and blaming herself about what happend.

"Allison" I want to hug him, but I can't. Wala akong karapatan.

"Let's not meet again, Sandro"

"Anong ginagawa mo dito?"

Pag dating ko sa resto ni Kalee, nakita ko si Steven na naglilinis ng mga table.

"Nag hirap kana ba?" Pang aasar ko sakanya.

He rolled his eyes. "Hindi mo ba alam? May share ako dito"

"Kanina pa nga sya dito. Sya pa ang nag bukas ng resto" sagot ni Kalee.

Napa iling na lamang ako at ibinaba ang hawak kong bag.

"What about you? What brings you here?"

Itinuro ko si Kalee na busy sa pag aayos ng mga baso. "She asked me to help her again."

Wala din naman akong ginagawa sa bahay kaya pumayag na ako. Hindi ko lang akalain na pati si Steven ay nandito.

I thought si Symon ang makikita ko dito ngayon. I can't still believe na they end up dating each other.

But, after all. I'm still so proud of her.

"Have you eaten?" Just like the old days, he always asked me this question.

"Let's eat!"

I glared at him. "Can't you see how busy I am? Bakit ba nandito ka naman steven?"

"I want to eat, dali na. Ang lungkot kumain mag isa, Reese"

I can clearly remember the time we spent together.

Sana, si steven nalang ang nagustuhan ko nung una palang. Hindi na sana nawala si Ate.

"No" I answered.

He pinch my cheeks gently. "Can you please eat a lot?"

I just shrugged my shoulder and started to arranged the tables. Today is Saturday, a lot of customers will probably eat today.

"Eat this" Inaabot saakin ni Steven ang isang Sandwich. Tinitigan ko lang ang kamay nya.

Why are you doing this to me? Stop it. I know you're hurting inside.

"I---" he cut me off, open the sandwich and he put it in my mouth.

"Steven!" Naiiritang sigaw ko.

"Para kayong aso't pusa"

"Nakakainis ka!" He stick his tongue out.

"Goodmorning po!" Naka ngiting bati ni Steven sa mga pumapasok. Bagay na bagay nya ang ganitong trabaho. Sa lahat ng pumapasok sobrang feeling close nya kaya kinikilig ang ibang babae na nakakakita sakanya.

"Table for 4 po please"

"Come this way po"

Kahit ilang taon na ang lumipas kailan man ay hindi nag bago si Steven kung paano ko sya nakilala.

"Reese, tissue please" sigaw nito.

"Ate, isang plate pa po ng soy garlic wings po"

I'm so tired. Sobrang sakit na ng mga paa ko. Ilang oras na ba kaming naglalakad pabalik balik ni Steven? Napaka daming tao

"Enjoy your food!" Napa iling na lamang ako, kahit ilang oras na syang naka tayo hindi nawawalan ng energy si Steven. Nagagawa pa din nitong ngumiti and that's what I love about him.

"Are you tired?" Tanong ni Kalee.

I nod my head. "You can come inside"

Umiling ako "No, its okay. I can manage. Mahal naman ang bayad" pagbibiro ko.

"Wel---"

"Hi?" Naka ngiting bati nito saakin.

Napa pikit ako ng mariin. Hindi ba nila ako titigilan?

"Table for 2 please" he's smiling while saying that.

"Ako na" Steven whispher in my ear.

"You can sit over there, Sandro"

Pinalo nya ang kamay ni Steven na naka hawak sa braso nya. "I want her to serve me"

Everyone is looking at us and that's what I hate. Attention seeker pa din si Sandro hanggang ngayon.

I grabbed Steven hand and smiled at him to assure him na I'm okay.

"I'll deal with him" I said

Hindi ko naman sya maiiwasan habang buhay and I know he'll never stop bugging me until he gets what he wants.

"Here's the menu for today"

"Sit down"

Nanatili akong naka tayo sa harapan nya without saying anything.

"Sit down" pag uulit pa nito.

Is he playing around again? He's already 26 yrs old for pete's sake!

"Can't you hear me?" Taas kilay nitong tanong.

I sigh "Stop it, Sandro"

"Uupo kaba? Or I'll make a scene here?"

"What do you want?"

He smirked "Sit down"

Uupo na sana ako para matapos na ang usapan ngunit biglang dumating si Steven at hinatak ako.

"Break time mo na"

"I'm talking to her, can't you see?"

"Grow up, Sandro. Stop bothering her."

He smirked. "Why are you suddenly acting like that, Steven? Because she regained her memories?"

I saw how Steven closed his fist.

"Stop acting like a kid, Sandro. Grow up"