Chapter 41 Windsor Knot

Chapter 41 Windsor Knot
Julian
My handsome face stared back at me, as I arranged my collar before the mirror. I was a hundred percent convinced it was what I wanted that morning. —All that was missing was my tie "Where's the tie? I need it now." I called Sarah. She had just finished ironing it on the board. I wondered why she refused the maid's help to prepare my clothes yesterday— She had prepared all my clothes herself, which was strange. Sarah looked like the type that hadn't worked a day in her life. It was impressive she handled the iron with ease and the rest of the stuff she had been doing around the castle. "Here it is! Hope I didn't keep you waiting! Here —turn to me, let me put that around your neck!" Sarah pushed a stool before me and climbed on it to be above me. "Now steady, big man. Today is your big day!" A small smile crept on my face and I held her hands. "Do you even know how to knot a tie?" I teased her. Sarah cocked her eyebrows, displeased at my joke. She ignored me and did a good job with the tie. She jumped down and turned away from me. I grinned at her. "What's that? Shutting your haters?" I looked at the tie. It was a perfect Windsor knot. She lifted my son up and patted his back while she applied light makeup on her face. "Here, let me help you with that," I volunteered. She handed him to me and I carried him to the window. "How are you doing son? How are you doing, my boy?" I wiggled him in the air and he cooed happily. "Hey careful now, I just fed him." Sarah warned me as she wore her contacts. "He might be of werewolf blood, but he's just like any other baby out there." I held him close to me. "Tell me that's a lie boy. It's a lie right? It's a lie?" I smiled and shook him a last time before I cradled him. As I moved him in my arms, my brows furrowed. The sun just had to be that high for me to see it— the striking resemblance of his face with someone else. I wasn't so sure at first, but when I moved into the light at the window I saw it again. He had my hair colour, maybe a bit of my features but I had always thought that he had his mother's face. But this time, for a moment I thought I saw Raphael, Laura's father. I shook my head. No, it was the eyes. He had grey eyes, eyes that none of his parents possessed. None of my relatives or Sarah's relatives had grey eyes that I could remember. The only person with these kinds of eyes was Laura's father. "What's wrong? You suddenly fell silent," Sarah asked. My mouth felt dry as my heart started racing. The baby belonged to Sarah and I, but how come— "Hey, are you somewhat related to Laura's family— like her mother?" The chair shifted. Sarah stared at me like I had said the foulest joke in the world, an abomination. "What are you saying?" Sarah's words were sharp. I looked at her. "Like— you and her mother. Was it not her mother that birthed you too? I mean Felicity..." "No, silly." She turned away and continued with the makeup. "Felicity, my step-mom married my father when I was still really small. I don't really remember when but she didn't give birth to me, why are you asking?" "Yeah, our boy barely looks like us, only for his hair, but some of his features, I don't recognize them from our bloodline—" "Our son is unique!" Sarah interrupted me, suddenly harsher than before. "Why are you asking the questions? What are you implying?" "Okay, I'm sorry Sarah. I'm not doubting you, I'm just saying it." I apologized quickly not wanting to anger her not my son. He was falling asleep. If we argued, he would put up a tantrum that we wouldn't be able to calm him from. I dropped Nathan in the nursery with the caretaker maids, just in time with Sarah finishing her make up. She rushed to my side and held my arm. "Come on, let's go!" She smiled like it was the happiest day in her life and we didn't just have an argument about the child. But once again, I pushed it all aside and smiled. "Let's go." This was the right thing to do. The rejection was all that mattered, for my son and his mother Laura— —Wait what? My steps stiffened. My chest felt like rusting gears. I suddenly bent over and Sarah threw a concerned glance at me. "What's wrong baby?" She held my back but I was far from her. Why would I think about Laura? Nathan's mother was Sarah, and I knew that! I had dropped Sarah at the hospital that day. What was I doing thinking about things like this? —Except she... "Julian?" Sarah snapped and I broke out of the thoughts I held Sarah's hands and smiled reassuringly to her. "I'm alright now. I think I took my beverage too early," I lied. Sarah looked at me a few more seconds before she turned away. "Don't worry, it will soon be over and we will be together again." My heart had started racing no matter how I tried calming myself. Even when I appeared before the council that handled the rejection in the main hall, in front of my numerous officers and people of influence I was still very nervous. Was this because this was my first time rejecting anyone? "Your hands are trembling, are you having cold feet?" Sarah whispered as we sat down in our seats. I looked at her and faked a smile. "I'm just a bit nervous. Nothing else." "Nervous my foot!" Sarah lowered her voice and looked around. "You have to do this Julian!" She hissed. "Do it for us, for our son." She soothed her voice. It was more like she was begging me to see it through but she was my future. "Don't worry Sarah, I'm fine. We will see this though, she will leave here today. I signed the document right?" Sarah nodded at me and she held my hands. A lot of questions raced through my thoughts. I kept asking myself if I really wanted to do it. What if my judgement was wrong? What if I was wrong? I never asked for the full story once, I was blinded by revenge. A lot of things could go wrong! What if this wasn't what my sister wanted? What if I was motivated by my own selfish interests? My sister would be so disappointed in me. A loud gasp echoed in the hall and I raised my head up. Suddenly, I felt fifteen again. I was relieving my teenage years at that moment. It felt like I had fallen in love again as Laura walked into the hall, basking us with her innocent and graceful presence. Dressed in a semi-formal black suit with skirts instead of trousers that showed off spotless, straight legs. Her hair was done into a neat pony tail, with red lipsticks that I hadn't seen her wear before. She looked like a strong fierce woman as she picked her seat in the front. Mackenzie totally caught me staring at Laura and smirked at me. She whispered something to Laura and a small smile crept on her face, revealing her dimples. Fuck, I was lost. The chairman of the council, an elderly and well respected person in the land cleared his throat after the spectacle and all attention was on him— All except mine. —My attention was on Laura. I was sweating profusely, my wolf wanted to jump to her and stand by her side. No, I wanted to stand by her side, because I realized I loved Laura more than anything. "Now that the Luna has graced our presence, we will officially start the rejection procedures!" He called out in a rich voice. "The Alpha and the Luna shall now stand before the council." Laura left her seat and stood in front of the chairman as procedure required. I felt weak in knees, I could barely stand and face them. "Hey! What's wrong? Go!" Sarah whispered harshly. I swallowed harder than I had ever done in my life. All eyes were on me and the guards looked uncomfortable. "The Alpha shall now stand before us," the chairman repeated slowly with a small frown on his face. I stood up and forced a smile at Sarah. I walked towards the space between the chairman's table and the front seats of the hall. I felt very sick, my heart felt like it would pop out of my chest. I stood beside Laura, I could smell all the sweet scents on her body. I was intoxicated by it, I wanted more. She glanced at me and I felt like I would explode. "We shall now begin in the name of the Goddess—" I raised my hands up. "Erh—you know what? Can we get time out, for like ten minutes?" Laura raised a brow at me. A low murmur circulated around the hall. Sarah stood up from her seat. Her face was the definition of shock. "What are you doing?!" "Your highness, is there a problem?" The chairman whispered to me. "No—yes! I mean Yes!" I leaned closer and talked to him. "Can I just talk to Laura alone for a minute, I won't take too much time." The chairman blinked and stared at his watch. "Okay, please don't take much time." "Wait what?!" Laura questioned. "Thank you!" I nodded and grabbed Laura's hand and pulled her aside before she could pretest. "What's going on?" Laura asked me. The way her eyes peered into mine. My cold heart melted. I looked around and wiped the sweat on my forehead. It wasn't going to be an easy thing to say. "I will be frank with you... I can't do this. I can't reject you... I still want you, Laura."