Chapter 22

Matthew looked at Professor Simon Bevan and wondered if he had ever seen the man this happy. He beamed, smiling from ear to ear. Miranda, much to his displeasure, beamed back at him. She sat to his left, on a chair that was dragged from who-knows-where to make room for her around the small table.

Despite his confusion at Simon's behavior and his annoyance at Miranda's, this particular therapy session was the best he had ever had. He felt free, relaxed, and tranquil. After telling Miranda about his life, this was the next step he'd wanted to take.

He wanted her to be part of his healing. The fact that she was here with him, that he loved her so intensely, gave him hope. Hope that one day he would be able to completely let go of his past and move on.

Typically, each of the therapy sessions lasts for one hour, at most two. Today, however, the trio were chatting and discussing for about five hours, making it the longest Matthew had spent with the Professor in one sitting.

Before long, the sun began its descent into the horizon, and it was time to part. Miranda waved heartily from the passenger seat as he drove the car out of the outskirts where Simon's residence was located and into the main city itself.

As he gazed at the world outside the window, he noticed that Miranda was being unusually silent. Not that she was ever talkative, but it seemed like she was deep in thought.

Matthew's anxiety took the wheel and began to think up all sort of reasons and scenarios for her quietness. Swallowing, he glanced at her and saw her forehead furrowed, her teeth clamping down on her lower lip. She looked like she had something difficult to say and was trying to find the right way to say it.

Blowing out a breath, he reached a conclusion based on no evidence except his treacherous heart. She was going to leave him. The padding of the steering wheel squeaked as he gripped it tightly. Thinking back on the just concluded therapy session, he recalled the warning Simon had given the two of them.

It might be a difficult thing to do but do not let insecurities drive a wedge between you. Always discuss your problems and limit assumptions.

It was pretty good advice. Matthew's insecurities about women had led to him sending Miranda away. Which of course led to her kidnapping and assault. The events that occurred that day were forever etched in his mind. He had sworn to never let such a thing repeat itself.

But it seemed like he was in danger of breaking his oath.

Inhaling deeply, Matthew slowly dispersed his fears and concentrated on taking her home. Not that he was happy about that either. After Karly's second and self-destructive kidnapping attempt, Matthew had taken her back to his home but after a discussion, Miranda had decided to return to the house he gave her on the other side of the city.

He had been very unhappy, almost heartbroken at her decision, but three weeks had passed since then and she still visited, called, and texted, reassuring him that she did not want to leave him.

Pulling up to the house, he turned to look at his passenger. She still looked deep in thought, fiddling with the lapels of her shirt. Tapping her lightly on her shoulder, he said, "Miranda, we are here."

She jolted, startled. Blinking rapidly, she looked around and realized the car had stopped moving and that they had arrived at her place.

"Oh," she said in her quiet voice. "I did not know. I've been…lost in thought."

Trying his best to sound casual and not interrogative, he said, "Yes, I've noticed. What have you been thinking about?"

Miranda averted her eyes, biting her lip. Red flushed her face causing Matthew's heart to clench. Her reaction to the question was making his theory of her wanting to leave look plausible.

"It's fine. You don't have to answer. It's getting late. Do you mind us eating dinner together?" Matthew said, looking out the window.

She nodded. "I would like that."

Starting the engine, he asked, "Where do you want to go?"

She answered his question and he stared at her. Miranda did not have to wonder why. She had just given him the name of the restaurant where she met Karly and was almost raped. His expression tickled her, and laughter burst out of her, the sound diffusing the tension in the car.

For the first time since they left the Professor's residence, Matthew smiled, the gesture softening his features.

"You really want to go there?"

"Yes, I do. If it is not too much trouble."

"Not at all," Matthew said, pulling slightly on the steering wheel and out of the parking spot. The drive to the restaurant was silent, Miranda reverting to her reticence. He had to tap her again to tell her that they had arrived at the restaurant.

Miranda looked up and saw the entrance to the restaurant. All at once, the memories of her first time here came flooding in. She had arrived in the back of a taxi, in a shabby red sweater and dull blue jeans. Downtrodden, she had walked into the building prepared to sell herself to a man more than twenty years older than her.

Then came the attempted rape. The force with which he tore at her clothes, disrobing her; the way he tossed her to the ground when she had resisted. She remembered it all. And of course, the moment she met Matthew Devin.

His cold exterior at odds with his compassionate help. She remembered it. That was why she was here. She wanted this place, this restaurant that held a terrible moment of her past to be the site of a new different narrative.

Tonight, she wanted to tell Matthew Devin how much she loved him and ask him to spend the rest of his life with her. In more ways than one, it was a marriage proposal, but she did not have a ring. Buying a ring would take more confidence than she currently had. And more money also.

They entered the restaurant and settled down in one of the private dining rooms. Down the hallway was the room Karly tried to rape her in. She had seen a couple enter the room, chatting and laughing. Good for them.

Miranda picked up the menu and quickly found the meal Matthew usually ordered for her whenever they went out. She ordered smoothly, smiling when he chuckled.

"I wanted to do it myself this time around."

"It's fine."

The food arrived and the only sounds in the room became the sound of silverware hitting ceramic. They polished off their food, enjoying each other's company as they did. Throughout the meal, Miranda tossed the words in her head, trying to pick the right words to express her emotions.

She loved him. That was undisputable. But he did not love her. So how could she convince him to give a relationship with her a chance? She had to be calm and collected.

Staring at the chocolate pudding in front of her, she rehearsed the words over and over. And then, she opened her mouth.

"I love you," she blurted.

A pregnant pause. Realizing what she had done, Miranda dropped the spoon with a clunk and clamped down on her mouth. Eyes wide, she began to sweat though the room was air-conditioned and cool. Slowly, she raised her eyes to look at him. He was frozen, unmoving in his seat. His own spoon hung limply between his fingers.

In his eyes, disbelief and shock gleamed. He blinked rapidly, refocusing on her. "W-what did… what did you just say?" he asked, stuttering.

"What did… did you hear?" she whispered.

"You said that… that you l-love me."

Miranda swallowed. "I do."

"You love me?"

Miranda nodded. The damage had been done. The look on his face...It seemed like any moment now, he would bolt out of the doors and never come back.

"You love me?" Matthew repeated, his body quivering. "You… do you really love me? Is that what you wanted to say?"

Miranda straightened, gathering up all the courage she had. "I'm in love with you. I don't exactly know when I fell in love with you, but I did. I think it was the day that I saw you with… the woman. My heart broke at the thought of you having a lover. I think it was then. I don't know how to say this in a more refined way but… can you make a space for me in your life? I want to stay with you, by your side. That is if you will allow me."

Matthew stared at her with an unreadable expression.

Miranda lowered her eyes. She had ruined it. He was going to leave her. Heart pounding, she clenched her fist around the tablecloth, pudding long forgotten.

It's fine, she lied to herself. It was going to be fine. They lived in different areas of the city. She would never see him at work. It would take some time, but she would survive. It would be like nothing else, but she would survive.

Miranda repeated the lie to herself, concentrating on her breathing because she felt like she would faint any moment now. She was so focused on her life after Matthew's rejection that she did not realize that he had risen from his seat and was walking around the table.

Only when he came to stand beside her, that she reacted her head shooting up. Matthew leaned forward and placed his lips softly on hers. Miranda was shocked for a second but quickly returned the kiss, pressing forward.

After a few seconds, they pulled apart and gazed into each other's eyes.

"I love you too," Matthew said, bringing their foreheads together. "I've loved you from the very day we met. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?"

Miranda gasped, her heart racing. With tears in her eyes, she kissed him and whispered, "Yes, I will marry you.”

Acknowledgements This book is dedicated to my little sister. Thank you for your advice and support. You are irreplaceable.