Chapter 101 At last, unveiled
Instantly, that drop of tears snapped Alex back to reality. “Hey baby, don't feel bad about this.” He raised a hand brushing off the tears.
Lucas stepped under the shower to hide more tears that might drop. Alex was still in a confused state trying to understand that word, “Not normal.”
He needed to do something to ease the tension between them. So he stretched his hand and turned off the shower. The sudden silence felt louder than the water had been.
Lucas stood there, trembling slightly, his earlier confession hanging heavy in the humid air. Alex watched him quietly, worried about softening his expression.
“Come here,” he murmured as he
grabbed a large towel and wrapped it carefully around Lucas’s shoulders, drying his hair first before moving down his arms. The movements were slow and deliberate, but grounded.
Lucas didn’t speak. He watched Alex’s hands, his mind clearly racing.
Alex picked up another towel, stripped himself, and hung his wet clothes on the hanger. Then wrapped the towel around his waist. Without saying anything, he slipped an arm around Lucas’s waist and guided him out of the bathroom.
“Let’s sit, I need you to go into details so I can understand,” he said softly.
They moved into the bedroom. The air there felt cooler and calmer. Alex pulled Lucas gently down beside him on the three-seater leather couch close to the foot of the bed.
For a moment, neither of them spoke. Lucas stared at his hands as if searching for some hidden treasure there.
Alex waited a bit before taking his hand in his. “Baby, tell me about what you just said.
Finally, Lucas drew a shaky breath. It's about the secret I've lived with all my life.
Alex nodded once, “Okay, go on.”
Lucas hesitated again, his other hand tightening around the towel. “I’ve never told anyone this. Even my Dad didn't know the whole truth. My grandma said he never saw my nude since he was always out on business concerns.” He paused, his breath coming faster.
“You don’t have to rush,” Alex said gently, rubbing his hand.
Lucas shook his head. “No. If I stop again, I might never say it.”
He inhaled deeply, forcing himself to continue.
“When I was born, the doctors said something was wrong.”
Alex’s brow furrowed slightly, but he stayed silent.
Lucas’s voice trembled. “They discovered that my body wasn’t typical.”
He swallowed. “I was born a hermaphrodite.”
The word lingered in the room but Lucas forced himself to keep going before fear could stop him.
“I was born with two genital structures,” he whispered. “But my body didn’t develop the way it should have. My female reproductive system was underdeveloped with imbalanced hormones.”
His eyes dropped again to the floor. “I didn’t have male hormones either. The doctors didn’t even know what I would grow up to look like.”
Alex listened carefully, his expression steady. Lucas’s voice cracked slightly.
“Eventually my body started developing more male features. My appearance, my voice, my build, exactly everything people see now.” He gave a weak, humorless laugh. “So everyone assumed I was just a normal man.”
Silence followed. Lucas’s breathing grew uneven. “But I always knew I wasn’t normal,” he whispered.
He finally looked up at Alex, fear shining in his eyes. “I never felt like I fit anywhere. Not fully male. Not female. And when people talked about sexuality, I didn’t even know where I belonged.”
His hands began to shake. “So you see why I said I’m not normal,” Lucas said quietly. “And why I said, I’m not gay.”
Alex didn’t interrupt.
Lucas’s voice dropped to a fragile whisper. “I was afraid that if you found out, you’d think I lied to you. Or that I tricked you into loving me.”
The words tumbled out faster now. “I’m scared you’d see me as something broken. Something unnatural.” His voice cracked again. “And then you’d leave.”
The last sentence barely made it out.
Lucas kept his head down, unable to look at him. The room fell silent.
Then Alex moved. He gently lifted Lucas’s chin with his fingers until their eyes met. There was no disgust in Alex’s expression.
Only surprise and something softer.
“Lucas,” Alex said quietly.
Lucas braced himself. But Alex shook his head slightly, almost in disbelief.
“This…” he exhaled slowly, his heart clenched. “This is what you’ve been carrying all alone?”
Lucas blinked in confusion. Alex brushed his thumb along Lucas’s cheek.
“Baby… none of this makes you abnormal to me.”
Lucas stared at him.
“You’re still the same Lucas I fell in love with,” Alex continued calmly. “Nothing you just said changes that.”
Lucas’s lips parted slightly in shock. “You’re not…angry?” he asked weakly.
Alex gave a quiet huff of disbelief. “Angry? At what?”
Lucas’s eyes filled with uncertainty. Alex leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead.
“What surprises me,” Alex said softly, “is that you thought this would make me leave.”
Lucas’s chest tightened. For the first time since he began talking, some of the fear eased from his shoulders.
But as he continued explaining the medical details, how the doctors once struggled to understand his body, how he avoided further examinations as he grew older, Alex’s expression slowly shifted to more concern.
“Sweetheart,” Alex said carefully after a moment. “Have you seen a specialist recently?”
Lucas shook his head slowly.
“I stopped going about three years ago since nothing was changing. But as I met you, I felt a serious change and I've been feeling it any time I'm around you and mostly when you touch me.”
Alex’s thoughts spiraled back to the locker room, the day Lucas was staring at his arousal.
“Baby,” he said gently. “That day in the locker room, was it your first erection?”
His head snapped up, “How did…” He paused, and responded, “No, but it was my first strongest.”
Alex’s jaw tightened slightly. “Oh dear, you shouldn’t have had to deal with this alone,” he said quietly. “But you won’t have to anymore.”
Lucas glanced up.
Alex squeezed his hand firmly.
“We’re going to talk to a doctor,” he said gently but with quiet determination. “A real specialist. Someone who understands this.”
Lucas searched his face again, still half afraid. “And if they say something is wrong with me?” Lucas asked softly.
Alex pulled him closer until Lucas’s head rested against his chest.
“Then we deal with it, and don't ever say that you're not normal. It’s just your reproductive systems are not balanced yet.”
Alex murmured into his hair. His hand moved slowly up and down Lucas’s back, soothing.
“We will go through this together.”
Lucas closed his eyes. For the first time in years, the secret that had weighed on his heart no longer felt like a burden he had to carry alone.
Alex suddenly pulled his head and smiled winking at him, mischievously.
Lucas stared with surprise and then asked curiously, “What is funny?”
“I'm sort of happy somehow, you know. You got two genits.”
“And?”
“It means double enjoyment for me. Show me, I've felt your cocky before. I want to feel…”
“Alex…”