Chapter Twenty: Ezra

Sandy was probably saying something to me, something funny, but all I could focus on was the fact that Lacey was nowhere to be seen … not anymore. At some point, she had slipped away from the beach party, and I couldn’t even begin to imagine where she’d gone. I wanted to excuse myself from Sandy and seek Lacey out, but I didn’t. I didn’t want to be rude to Sandy, and I also didn’t want to piss off Lacey if she needed some space, and I couldn’t leave her be. Was she angry with me? Had I done something wrong? Had something happened to her?

“You’re such a good listener,” Sandy said, pulling my attention back to her. “I swear, most guys only want to talk about themselves or don’t actually listen when women speak. It makes me crazy.”

I forced a smile for her, fighting to keep my attention where it needed to be.

“Hey,” she added, coming closer to me. She did smell really fucking good, and I was swept away by her beauty for a brief moment. “Want to get out of here?”

Typically, it would have been me asking, but Sandy was on top of it, and briefly, I was caught off guard. Every physical part of my being screamed yes, yes, please, but my brain was having difficulty catching up to the idea. What would Lacey think? How would she feel? Did it matter? We’d established that friends with benefits was all this was, so I was allowed to hook up with someone else, right? That’s who I was. She knew that, and I knew that. That’s all there was to it.

I swallowed and turned back to look at Sandy with a forced smile and slight nod. “I’d love to. I’ll follow you.”

My legs felt stiff as I walked with Sandy away from the party, ignoring the pointed stare of my brother, who snickered and leaned over to whisper something to Ava. Both of them watched us go, but neither of them said anything. Sandy didn’t seem to notice.

“I’m so excited for the wedding tomorrow,” she said as we headed back towards the hotel, moseying along. “I’ve been friends with Ava forever. She deserves the happiness.”

“They both do,” I agreed, trying to keep up on the small talk but feeling like I was already failing. Where was the charming Ezra? The smooth-talking Ezra? The womanizer Ezra? I silently pleaded that he would make an appearance any time now as Sandy led me to the elevator and stepped inside. I went in after her, feeling insecure somehow, hoping she didn’t notice. What in the fuck was wrong with me?

“Floor ten,” she said, and I pushed the button with shaky fingers. I felt odd, off somehow, and it was shaking me up.

Where was Lacey? Was she off somewhere hurt? Angry? Upset? I briefly considered telling Sandy that I suddenly wasn’t feeling well and bail, but the other part of me knew that a random fuck with a total stranger might be what I needed to let Lacey go. I had no choice. I could get back into the swing of things. I had to.

“This is me,” Sandy said as we stepped onto the tenth floor and walked to her hotel room door a few paces. She pulled the key card out of her pocket and unlocked it, stepping in and holding the door, so I could come in after her. She let the door swing shut behind us, then reached up and locked the bolt. Then she turned to me, looking endearingly shy suddenly. “I hope this isn’t too forward for you,” she said softly, stepping near me until we were mere inches apart. “This isn’t like me, but I figured I should try to loosen up on this vacation. I’m not looking for anything but a hot night. Is that—is that something you can provide?”

I smiled despite myself and nodded, catching another whiff of her subtle perfume. “You found the right guy,” I told her. “This is what I do best.”

“I don’t know whether to be offended or impressed,” she said with a giggle. “I think it’s the latter.” She reached up and touched the side of my face. Her skin was soft, but there was no tingle like there was with Lacey. In fact, my body hardly wanted to react at all. I closed my eyes, forcing myself to think of something else—anything else—besides Lacey.

It just wasn’t working.

Sandy leaned into me then, moist lips touching mine, briefly setting me on fire, but the flames were short-lived and weak. I kissed her back, gently at first, but then with more force, more passion. Sandy moaned as I wrapped one arm around her back and lowered her onto the bed. Her slender legs wrapped around my midsection, pulling me close, and her scent lured me in, seducing me slowly.

“Oh, God,” Sandy moaned as I reached my hand to gently massage one of her breasts. Her hips rose to meet mine, begging for me, and I touched the side of her face with my fingers.

“You’re mine,” I whispered, pushing my body against hers. “You’re mine, Lacey.”

The words were out of my mouth before I realized my mistake, and Sandy’s body tensed up beneath me. She pulled her head back, frowning, pressing the palms of her hands against my chest.

“Lacey?” she repeated. “It’s Sandy.”

“Sandy,” I repeated. “That’s what I said.”

Smooth, asshole.

Shaking her head, Sandy pushed me off her, sitting up on the bed as she scooted away from me. “Lacey,” she repeated. “The girl you were with at the party tonight, right?”

I opened my mouth to deny this, but what was the point? She had me. “Yes,” I admitted. “She’s my best friend.”

“I heard Elijah and Ava talking about her this week,” said Sandy softly. “An old family friend. I—I should have known.”

“Known what?”

“That you had the hots for her.”

I shook my head, standing there at the edge of Sandy’s bed like some awkward asshole. “I don’t,” I said. “I don’t have the hots for Lacey. She’s just a friend.”

Sandy laughed humorlessly at this. “If that was truly the case, Ezra, we would have hooked up days ago, no? But there’s a reason I only met you tonight.”

I swallowed the painful lump in my throat, thinking of Lacey and how exceedingly correct Sandy was in calling me out. I didn’t even feel like the same person. I was a shell of the man I used to be—lost in a flurry of confusion and conflict. This stranger was right; Lacey was why I couldn’t do it. For the first time in my life, I couldn’t do it.

“I’m sorry,” I told Sandy, hoping she would believe the desperate truth in my voice. “You’re right, Sandy. It—it is Lacey. And I’m sorry I led you on. I thought maybe this would be what I needed to get over her.”

For a moment, I thought she’d be angry. Throw something heavy at me, maybe. But she did neither of these things. She simply glanced down at her hands and nodded, so I started to turn away towards the door to leave.

“Hey,” she said as I reached for the door's handle. I turned around to look at her, surprised to see a slight smile on the woman’s face.

“Yeah?”

“You did good,” she said. “I hope after tonight you have realized what Lacey means to you and what you should do from here on out to keep her. She—she’s a lucky woman. Try not to screw it up.”