Chapter 121 cravings
Heading towards the east section of the pack, l walked quickly but I only made a few corners before my rage, fear and nausea caught up to me. My limbs shook uncontrollably and my gut tightened up just before l stumbled over and spilled the entire contents of my stomach in the trash can that was in the corner.
Quickly without thinking, l hurried up to the infirmary. There was no one in the infirmary , all the people were preparing for the winter solstice. Weak and tired, l stumbled over to the cupboard. I wanted ginger and chamomile right now, it was the tea l wanted to take. The kitchen was around but I didn’t want to go there and also there was a cooking stove in the infirmary.
However before I could make myself tea, soon enough I heard noise in the darkness of the doorway. After what happened with Alex, fear raced down my spine and I quickly swirled around then looked in the darkness. It was shockingly no one but Idris. I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw him walk forward.
“Why are you in the infirmary Raelynn?”, His serious question caught me off guard and I trembled as I turned to him. I turned but I failed to open up my mouth and tell him that my mood swings were happening because I was pregnant. “Nothi….”
“There is something wrong Raelynn, Zara told me that you didn’t seem alright when you left her, so she came and fetched me from my office”, He seriously stopped me short in mid sentence.
“Dinner unsettled my stomach, am gonna be fine”, l turned my attention from him quickly. “How is your stomach feeling now?, What do you want to eat, l will order servants to prepare it right now”, His abrupt questions made me to lose all the appetite l had for the tea. His questions needed answers but I wasn’t ready to answer any. I didn’t want to explain myself and when his questions resounded in my head, l found myself getting angry.
After a deep breath, l let my shoulders sag , tried to release the growing tension in my body then turned to look at him. “ Don’t worry about me, I will be fine after resting”, l spoke boldly then turned on my heels ready to leave. However just as l was passing via him, his hand quickly snaked and wrapped up around my wrist then pulled me back in the room.
“Is there anything wrong Raelynn?”, He asked in a concerned voice but his words fueled up the anger that was already burning in my body. Something was burning in my blood and it felt like it was taking control of my body. “Don’t worry about me Idris, l will be fine”, l spoke with a reassuring smile on my face but as l tried to remove my hand from his grip.
Idris noticed it and tightened up his grip on me. When I realized it too, l felt anger flow more down in my blood. “I have told you am gonna be fine, leave me alone”, l snatched my hand angrily away from his grip. “There is no where you going without telling me what is wrong”, He tried to hold my hand again but I shook my head then raised up my palm, stopping him from coming nearer to me. His face was like a stone as he watched me but that still didn’t stop me.
“Please Idris say no more words you pissing me off, stay away from me, l want to be alone, stay away from me am kindly requesting you”, l was panting trying my level best to control myself.
“I don’t know what has happened to you Raelynn but “,
“SAY NO MORE WORDS”, l loudly cut him off in mid sentence and that wasn’t the only thing that was happening to me. Idris stood shocked, my eyes were glowing red, staring angrily at him. “Stay away from me for now”, After trying to calm myself down, l spoke then ran out of the room. Whatever I was becoming in this strange world was undescribable.
I went back to his chambers but straight to my room not his. I wanted to be cold and alone. “I want ginger”, Just as l had plopped down on the bed, my pregnancy hormones kicked in. Without wasting any second, l quickly walked out of the room then made it straight to the kitchen. There was no one inside and this gave me a chance to prepare it quickly.
As soon l took it, It did it’s job of healing my stomach. With that done, l made it back in my room then rested on my cold bed. After spending many nights with Idris’s warmth around me , it felt wrong to sleep alone but it’s all l wanted right now. As sleep claimed me, l could easily hear that freezing rain began to pelt windows and wind howled outside. It was so cold but I was still fine with it.
I was fine with everything except Idris’s presence.
The last few days leading to the Holiday were dreadful. I somehow got swept up in whatever decorating and planning, Zara was involved in, leaving me few precious hours in the afternoon to go and visit the garden. I ate all my meals this time all because of Zara. She always went in the kitchen and told the servants the type of the food they should prepare separately for me.
Most of the time, we always ate with Valerie. Sometimes Leslee was always with us but still things weren’t good between us. She was like poison infecting the mood of every room she entered in. Her foul mood cast darkness throughout the room. She always had anger and jealousy in her eyes.
Valerie on the other hand was the complete opposite. I’m not sure how they became best friends. Ignoring people was one of my characters but Leslee was worse than me. Every time we met in the room , one of us made sure to leave first. It was always her most of the times who left.
I had no interest in her just like l did currently in Idris. I began to avoid him throughout the days. Having my own room made it easier to be alone. My words perhaps annoyed him. There was no lingering eyes when we happened to be in the same. Of course Idris always looked in my way with concern and worry in his eyes.
Naturally his eyes fall on me but he didn’t say anything to me. He watched me as I decorated the room with the werewolves and spoke nothing. He found us finishing everything in the grand hall but still didn’t mind about me.
“Alpha Idris is here”, l held up my breath when l noticed the way he hesitated while looking in my direction.
Eventually he swallowed hard then walked in our direction with his eyes focused on Zara and Valerie. “Raelynn taught us the best way of weaving winter Flowers, what do you think?”, I shrank into myself as Zara swept her arms up to the heights of the ceiling and the stark white flowers and green vines that we spent a day and a half weaving.
According to Zara she was excited because they have been a few flowers that grew ever since Brian chose the darkness. “It’s really amazing, my father used to love winter flowers”, Valerie smiled ear to ear as she looked at Idris. Idris didn’t respond to them. I wished he would show me some sign of what he was thinking. My nerves began to bristle as I felt like a mouse being watched by a hawk.
“They are lovely”, He lastly spoke but he quickly turned his eyes from me when Leslee sashayed in the room. Her cobalt eyes lit up at the sight of Idris and she moved with purpose in his direction. However when she noticed me among the group of people , her delighted face turned sour.