45

I lift my arm to cover my cough, despite already having a mask on. Clearing my throat I nod in reply to what the doctor is saying. He's simply reading off of a medical monitor, talking through the different functions and basic stuff I already know but am too polite to say I do. Exams finished just when I started getting sick. Sure enough, I woke up with a sore throat one day, despite the air quality being good outside. Then a stuffy nose soon followed. Now I have this constant itch in my throat that makes me want to reach my hand down my larynx and scratch it. It's that bad. It's especially annoying when I'm trying not to cough every second like a whooping cough patient while at the hospital. I was lucky enough to snag a volunteer position at the hospital my university partners with. Or not lucky, I just studied hard enough. But unfortunately, I had to meet my mentor with a face mask on and red nose. Jaewook, the cause of this misfortune, is perfectly healthy now—taking extra shifts at work and going for runs almost every morning. It's like his time spent alone sleeping in bed or playing videos has refilled his personal charge battery to the max, and then some. Now he's on a high, quickly growing antsy when he runs out of things to do. It also happens to make him eager to go on dates with me. He wanted to go to Namsan tower one night, then all the way to the beach another, and today he wanted to go shopping in Gangnam "just 'cause." Every time I just gave him a look that emphasized the death in my eyes and snot in my nose. "You did this to me Jae. You did. Face the consequences." On the bright side, it's forced him to find new companions to do things with. Typically, it would be Hansoo, and it still is—kinda. After they reconciled over the whole almost-a-love-triangle-but-I'm-not-interested-sorry fiasco, they almost forcefully spent a day at a batting cage. It seemed working a sweat and playing baseball helped rekindle their friendship. That and Hansoo backing off from me for the past week It helps that he got a new distraction, a cute little munchkin kitten that he constantly posts photos of on social media to show off. I constantly comment "I told you so," but he refuses to admit I was right about him needing something to care for. Jaewook's other friend just ends up being himself. That boy sure loves exploring the city on his own now. He keeps sending me photos of restaurants he goes to or scenic views at the latest park he found. As sweet as it is it just makes me itchy. I hate being sick, it leaves me alone with my thoughts. And now that school's done, I don't have anything to study to distract myself. I've tried focusing on Japanese when I'm really desperate, but there's only so much one can learn when they're grabbing for tissues every second. I can feel myself go insane. It's funny how different Jaewook and I are in that regard. It's almost like he enjoys doing these things without me. But now I'm finally free to go home again after my apprenticeship slash volunteering shift. Being around sick people all day just makes me feel even sicker. The first thing I do when I'm home is fall on my bed and instantly fall asleep, which is a rare occurrence for me. Another rare occurrence is me sleeping heavily—so heavily that I don't wake up until the sound of something dropping comes from the kitchen. I sit up suddenly, drool leaving my open mouth and eyes dropping. "Wh-where, what—" after a moment of complete silence, I begin to believe that I'm hallucinating things now. But then I hear soft noises. I get up and shuffle my way out of my room. I have to blink a few times to understand what my eyes are seeing. Jaewook turns to look at me with an uneasy grin as he stirs something in a pot. "Did I wake you? I'm sorry, I dropped this by accident," he trails off as he points to a pot lid. "What the hell are you doing?" "Making you dinner, like you did for me when I was sick, I want to do the same. I know I've been kinda leaving you on your own lately. I'm sorry. I'm a terrible boyfriend." "No, you're not." I walk over and lean against his body. "You're amazing." "I forget that you don't like being alone sometimes. Did you sleep well? I went to your room and you were snoring up a storm." He chuckles and I swat at his head. "Again, you—" I begin. "—did this to me, I know I know. Go sit down." I take a seat and watch him as he cooks. I mean, it's just ramen in soup stock, but it's the thought that counts. He sits beside me and watches as I eat the meal. He talks about what he did today, which includes joining a group of old ladies in the park to do tai chi. I almost snort out soup when he tells me that. "What? Why are you laughing?" But he's laughing as well. "Imagining you, this young, tall, built man doing tai chi with a group of short old ladies is too much for me. They must have worshipped you like a god." "They invited me to join tomorrow morning too, and one said she'll bring me homemade kimbap." I roll my eyes. "Everywhere you go you have older women fussing over you." "What can I say, I attract the Noonas." "Those aren't Noonas baby, those are grandmas." He giggles and I can't help but grin in response. "Thank you for this, I feel better already." He takes a piece of my hair between his fingers and moves closer to me. "I can kiss you, right? Since I already fought through this sickness." "But I'd rather you—" my words are cut off by his mouth. He smiles as he kisses me before pulling away quickly. The cute little smile on his face makes me feel tingly inside. It's so pure, so full of endearment that it makes me feel like turning into jelly. I've been through the predictable timeline of relationships before, but this is different. There's a honeymoon phase that is supposed to end after three months or so. After that, when all the giddiness and the passion to get down and dirty every second disperses, people often grow bored of one another. Fights occur once the flaws that were once cute are now just a nuisance. People lose focus and start looking elsewhere without even realizing it, searching for the honeymoon high once again. That happened last time. But this time, everything's different. The rules don't apply to us it seems as we head into the eighth month of being together. It makes my brain spin when I realize that. Eight months? Really? And we haven't torn each other apart yet? He still loves me? I'm still equally as interested in him? It's all quite baffling to me, someone who used to be notorious for expecting all relationships to fail after the honeymoon phase. But now, as I lean my head against his shoulder and tell him about my day, I realize something. I don't just love him, I like him. I like him as a person. Stripping all the attraction, chemistry, love away, I genuinely like who he is as a human being. And maybe that's what was wrong with my other relationships. Blinded by the initial passion of a relationship, so-called love was all we could see until it ran out. And when it ran out, there was nothing I liked about the guy. And that would be the end. "Jaewook?" "Yes Noona?" His hands continue to run through my hair because he knows I've grown to love it. "I like you." He laughs. "I like you too?" "You're my favourite person." His laughing stops and it's like I can almost hear his thoughts. He's thinking the same thing. "You're my favourite person, too." And that's when I realize that I can't live my life without him. In this moment of solace, my naive little mind had no idea what would face me a day later. Something I never imagined I'd ever have to go through. ...