Chapter 53

JAX

I looked at her lying in the hospital bed and there was nothing that I could do or say that would make this situation harder on her. She lost her mate, her pack, and now a baby. She had so much stress going on that she had a stress seizure probably from overhearing us. I stayed while everyone went home. She woke up and just stared with this blank expression. She had lost all hope in everything around and there wasn’t anything that would change that. She broke.

I knew I would be crossing so many lines, but we still carried a mate bond and hers had been cut with his death. I walked over and climbed into the bed and pulled her to my chest. She let me without fighting but she barely moved. She was limp in my arms and the only thing she was doing was breathing. I wrapped my arms around her tight hoping it would comfort her. We fell asleep like that.

The nurse woke us up in the morning, but she just stared at the wall and went mute. She didn’t talk for days. It got to the point where they had to insert a feeding tube and they were giving her baths. Her family was taking care of her kids, but I was afraid that she would never come back from this. I don’t think that I ever would either if I lost as much as she has.

“Doc, tell me there is something we can do to get her out of this state. Her kids need her.” We were at the door watching her stare at nothing.

“She needs time. Her wolf has fallen silent. Her mate dying was the cherry on top,” she told me, but it wasn’t enough.

“What if she had another mate. Her first mate?” I asked. Her eyes looked at me.

“It could work because she would have the urge to love him or her.”

She would hate me, but she needed to snap out of it. It was what was best for her.

I walked over to her and propped her up.

“I’m sorry. I know I am doing this against your wish again, but I have to.” But she didn’t say anything or do anything that tells me not to. I brought my teeth down to her neck and quickly sunk my canines into her. I did it for as long as I could until I felt movement and suddenly a pain in my shoulder. She marked me on instinct. I didn’t know how I felt about it to be honest because I had given up the idea of her and me. But now it’s like we both didn’t have a choice now that we were bound together. I think she finally noticed and retracted.

“What did I do?” She stared at me completely horrified.

“I didn’t expect you to do it back. I did it to wake you. It was going to fade but you just made me your mate Ry.” She covered her mouth in shock.

“Are you mad?” I asked her. She hesitated for a minute but just shook her head.

“No. I can’t be mad at you for being selfless. I mean it was this damn wolf of mine trying to feel better and she won. Listen, I know what this means but I lost my mate a few days ago and I am not ready so please don’t think you have to be loyal to me because I come with a lot of baggage now.”

She slowly got off the bed and walked over to the bathroom. But I was so attached to her now more than ever that it didn’t matter to me. My wolf was finally complete.

“I want all your baggage. I want your problems, your tears, your love, your kids. Everything.” She stopped to look at me and even I was surprised as to what came out of my mouth. My wolf was some hopeless romantic. She gave me a half-smile before she closed the door, and I heard the shower water turn on.

Was this what it felt like to be mated? Because it was strange. It was like my whole world revolved around that other person and the thought of anything happening to her just pains me to the core. But she was right that she came with baggage and there were going to be a lot of holes in the road before we got to where we were. But she had kids who just were told that their father is dead. Dylan didn’t take it very easy which made me feel bad. How could I ever feel that void and how could I be a parent to kids that weren’t mine? I was connected to her but her kids? Maybe I just needed time. But it has to work out and seeing her now and how mature she’s gotten over the years makes me love her more.

A loud crash came from the bathroom, and I was up on my feet and to the door that I opened. She was lying on the shower floor.

“I got dizzy, I’m sorry.” I climbed into the shower and helped set her on the seat here.

“You’re getting yourself soaked. Jax, I am okay.” I brushed the hair out of her face.

“I don’t care. Let me help you, okay?”

She looked completely humiliated but just nodded. I reached over to grab the shampoo and started massaging in her hair before washing it out and helped get her clean. I know she felt embarrassed, but this wasn’t something I did to get off. I just wanted to help. I turned the shower off and reached for a towel to wrap around her body. I took it upon myself to take my clothes off and wrap a towel around me. I lifted her in my arms, and she just relaxed.