Chapter 35 Her presence in his mind

Chapter 35 Her presence in his mind
Cassius,

I needed to take a shower once again after returning home. Standing under the shower, all I could see was the mark, the scratches left by sharp nails. The moment the cold water hit my skin, they burned like fire.

I couldn't stop thinking about last night. She had no scent, but it felt oddly soothing. Her voice against my eardrums was like a melody of soft whispers that wouldn’t fade. She was physically weak, but her demands were heavy, impossible to ignore.

She had to take inhalers twice in between, yet her stubbornness and desperate need didn’t stop until we both collapsed.

“Damn.” I rested my arm against the wall, water sliding down my shoulders as I tried to steady my breath. My reflection on the fogged glass looked unfamiliar, raw, and violent. I couldn’t shake off the scene no matter how hard I tried.

This woman. Since day one, she had been haunting me like a ghost. Her boldness, her straightforwardness, and now the undeniable perfection of physical compatibility… everything about her dug deep into my mind. I could feel the heat crawling beneath my skin at just the memory of her breath against my neck.

But deep inside, guilt clawed at me. It was sharp and suffocating. I still couldn’t allow myself to get involved with another woman in my life again. The guilt was constant, gnawing at my soul as if I never deserved to exist.

Yet here I was, standing in a luxurious room surrounded by everything a man could want. The endless gardens, the clear lakes, the maids bowing in silence—everything was mine, except her.

The one who had dreamed of planting flowers in the garden. The one who wanted to buy a boat so we could ride it together across the lake. The girl who once wanted to kiss me desperately, but I pushed her away.

The girl who would have been twenty-five years old now, sitting beside me, whining for attention, choosing my ties and shirts, wondering whether I had dinner or not.

In the midst of power, respect, and luxury, all I could think about was her. Even if it meant giving up everything, I would have traded it all just to see her again.

I wish I never said those words. I wish I had told her what I truly felt. I wish I hadn’t been too proud to admit what my heart screamed for.

I am sorry, Rosalinda.

“Your Majesty! Your fiancée is waiting for you. She said it’s urgent!”

Julian’s voice cut through the silence, echoing in my head through the mind-link. My jaw tightened at the word fiancée. It reminded me of Faustina’s warning—it was scandalous to be with another woman after being engaged.

But I never acknowledged her as my fiancée. There was no way that woman was mine.

“Got it. Investigate her real background. I don’t think she’s a Foxbrown,” I said coldly, running my fingers through my wet hair, my tone clipped and commanding.

“Okay, Your Majesty.” His connection faded.

I stayed under the cold water for another five minutes, forcing myself to calm down, even though the ache in my chest refused to ease. When I finally stepped out, a towel hanging around my waist, I stopped dead in my tracks.

My eyes darkened instantly.

Armilia Foxbrown was sitting on the edge of my bed, her fingers tracing the sheet as if she owned the place. The instant she heard the click of the door, she flinched and stood up quickly, her nervousness evident in the way her shoulders stiffened.

She threw her hair back and tried to smile. “Hi, good morning!” Her voice trembled slightly.

“Who allowed you to enter my bedroom?” My voice dropped low and icy, vibrating through the air.

Her body froze. Her face turned pale as her lips parted, fumbling for words. “I... I thought it’s okay since we are engaged.”

“Engaged?” My gaze hardened, and she instinctively stepped back. “Since when did I allow you to call yourself my fiancée? How dare you enter my private chamber without permission?”

She visibly swallowed, her knees trembling as she tried to stand straight. “Your Majesty, everyone knows about our engagement. You even told my family you were fine with it. You can’t be angry with your own fiancée, can you? Isn’t it time to think about our future together instead of denying me?”

Her audacity was almost laughable. Thinking about a future with me?

“Miss Foxbrown.” My tone sharpened, deep and dangerous. “Get out of my room before I make you regret staying. Whoever you are, you are not allowed to enter my space.”

The air around me darkened as my Aura pressed down on her like a suffocating weight. She gasped, clutching her chest as if the very air was being stolen from her lungs.

Her eyes glistened with tears as she stammered out a weak bow and ran out of the room, the door slamming behind her.

“Damn it,” I muttered under my breath, rubbing my temples. “I need to deal with my mother. How dare she ruin my mood by bringing that pathetic woman here?”

My thoughts froze midair as Miss Thorne’s words returned to me. She said she might get pregnant.

A heavy silence filled the room. The realization hit like a blade. It wasn’t impossible. Last night, neither of us had control. No protection. No restraint. Just raw instinct.

“Damn. Damn!” My hand slammed against the marble counter, veins rising on my forearm. “What the hell did I do?”

I ran both hands through my hair, pacing back and forth, chest heaving. The images of her from last night flashed again, her trembling voice, her flushed face, the way she clung to me as if her soul knew mine.

“What if she gets pregnant?” My voice lowered, rough and strained. “I can’t let her get rid of it.” My jaw tightened, my breath sharp and heavy. “I remember knotting more than twice. Fuck.”

My reflection stared back at me from the mirror, eyes darker than night, expression carved with fury and confusion. The man staring back wasn’t calm anymore. He was dangerous.

And the worst part was, for the first time in years, I didn’t know who I was angry at—her, fate, or myself.