Chapter 98 Heart’s Confession
Amara’s POV
Even though the night was calm, a storm was raging inside of me. For what seemed like hours, I sat by myself and looked at the moon. My throat was dry, and my chest hurt. The words burned before I could say them, but I knew what I had to do.
I couldn’t hide anymore. Not Rowan's. Not from Kian. Not from me.
They were both waiting when I eventually entered the pack hall. Leaning against the wall with his arms folded, Rowan had a tired, pale face but keen eyes. Kian's jaw was set like stone as he stood beside the window, his shoulders stiff.
Like lightning before thunder, there was a heavy air between them.
Rowan’s words pierced the silence. “Amara. You requested that we wait. We have waited. Now talk.
Kian's eyes shifted to mine, hurting and softer. "Just be honest in whatever you say."
My mouth quivered. Despite my desire to run, my legs were immobile. My eyes hurt with tears. "I... I can no longer keep this to myself."
Each of them stepped forward.
I gripped my chest and shook my head. "I cherish you." My voice broke. "I cherish you both."
Like stones dropped into deep water, the words vanished into the silence.
Rowan's eyes narrowed, and his face contorted. "Both?" His voice sounded like shards of glass.
Kian winced, gasping for air. "Amara."
As the tears rolled down my cheeks, they were hot. I tried to resist it. I tried to deny it. However, that is the reality. You two have both got my heart.
Rowan balled his fists. His voice was sharp as he looked aside and then back at me. “Do you realize what you’re saying? You’re tearing us apart.”
"I understand!" I sobbed and dropped to my knees. "I hate myself for it, but I know." I can't lie to you, though. No more.
Kian was the first to move, kneeling next to me and stroking my hand. "Amara... It is not a crime to love." "We both gave you our hearts, and you gave us both yours." "That isn't a sign of weakness. That’s the truth.”
Rowan's jaw clenched as if he were battling a thousand emotions within himself. He knelt as well, slowly and awkwardly, and spoke quietly. "So, what are we meant to do? Amara, tell me. Because I cannot continue to live under another man's shadow.
I put my hands over my face and cried. "Neither of you should be harmed by me. Neither of you should be lost. But I'll break us all if I say nothing."
Rowan's heavy, hesitating hand stroked my shoulder. Kian's hand remained solid and warm in mine.
And I remained there, heart ripped open, between them both.
The stillness was long and agonizing. The only sound in the thick air was the crackle of the fire in the hearth. Neither man withdrew, but my weeping continued.
Rowan sounded hushed, as if he was terrified of the response. "Whatever, Amara? Will you keep us both restrained during this suffering?"
Kian looked into my eyes, both hopeful and filled with anguish. "Or will you ultimately make a decision?"
With trembling hands, I swallowed forcefully. I slowly extended my hand and took Kian's in one and Rowan's in the other. Kian had a steady but shaky grip, while Rowan's was powerful and nearly frantic.
I spoke in a whisper. "I'll make a decision."
The two men froze. Rowan's fiery eyes were fixed on me. Kian's hand tightened around mine as his breath caught.
I whispered, my chest rising and falling with heavy breaths, "I can't drag this out any longer." My heart is still at war, even though the conflict is done. It isn’t fair to any of you.”
Rowan's rough, trembling thumb brushed over my skin. Then, Amara, stop it. Set us free. Set yourself free.
Kian's eyes gleamed as he bent closer. “Whatever you decide… I’ll accept it. Even if I die for it.
I nodded, but their words broke my heart. "I must tell the truth to you both. I owe the truth to myself.
We sat in quiet for a long time, the three of us connected by love and suffering. Rowan's heartbeat was loud and rapid for me to hear. Kian's breath was shaky against my skin, and I could feel it.
The words burned on my tongue as I opened my mouth. My mouth quivered.
The silence was broken by Rowan's piercing, demanding voice. "Amara, who?"
With my chest constricted and my eyes streaming down my cheeks, I peered between them.
Rowan's eyes were raw and beseeching as they penetrated me. "Who do you pick?"
Kian had a pallid face and silently beseeching eyes.
I opened my mouth. My heart let out a cry. The response tugged at the corner of my mouth.
However, before I could say anything—
The world appeared to pause.