Chapter 18 — Marco

I take a deep breath as I emerge from my den, the sun just beginning to peek over the horizon. Katina has left only moments ago, but her scent still lingers in the air, on my body and every nook and cranny of my den.

Her words weigh heavily on my heart like thick boulders, crushing me beneath a wave of hurt and disappointment.

She deems last night’s events as a mistake, nothing more than a result of the bond we now share because of the mating dance we performed, but I know that isn’t true. My feelings for her are genuine, only now intensified by the bond.

My mind races as I try to come to terms with what she said. Have I misread the signals somehow? Have I mistaken her kindness and warmth for something more? I can still feel the bond between us, throbbing with a sense of loss within the very heart of me, as I think about how different things would be if I hadn’t asked her to be my pretend mate in the first place.

I wonder if she would have been susceptible to a relationship between us, if I hadn’t come to her with the pretend proposal. But it doesn’t matter now. The damage has been done, the words have been spoken, and the hurt has been inflicted. The only thing that’s left is to find a way to go around it.

As the newly mated Alpha and Luna of this pack, we were supposed to have the day off from our responsibilities, but I can’t allow myself to sit and wallow in self pity, while Katina is out there doing whatever it is she doing, so I send a message through the link I share with the council members to meet me at the chambers immediately.

I feel their surprise at my request through the link, but no one questions me. After all, we have a lot to discuss regarding the safety of our pack. Our pack might be one of the strongest, but we are not without enemies, and my status as a newly mated Alpha might have been the first step in ensuring the pack’s stronghold, but it won’t deter others from trying to undermine us.

I need to make sure the pack is prepared for any eventuality.

As I make my way towards the council chambers, my mind races with the weight of my deception, and the irrevocable bond Katina and I now share because of my actions. I take my place at the head of the council as I enter the chambers, my mind now racing with plans and contingencies. I can feel the weight of responsibility settling onto my shoulders, but I refuse to let it crush me. I am the Alpha of this pack, and I will do whatever it takes to protect my people.

The increasing population of rogue wolves beyond our pack territory is becoming a serious issue, and everyone is looking to me as the Alpha for guidance.

"We must deal with the rogue wolves that are becoming increasingly aggressive in their attacks on our borders," I say in lieu of greetings. "If we do nothing, they will continue to encroach on our territory until we are forced to defend ourselves. We cannot wait for them to act first."

I can feel the tension in the room increasing as I speak, but I don’t waver. I know that the council members are all questioning what our course of action should be. This is not an easy decision, and the stakes are high.

One of the council members speaks up, interrupting the silence that has settled upon the room. "What is it that you suggest, Marco?" she asks.

"I propose that we send another team to patrol the borders and send a message to the rogue wolves that we will not tolerate their attacks," Adrik responds, even though the question wasn’t meant for him. "This team will be composed of some of our most skilled and experienced warriors."

The room breaks out into multiple conversations, with council members debating the merits and drawbacks of Adrik's proposal.

“What do you think, Jacob?” I turn and ask him, deferring to him for council because he is the oldest wolf among us.

"I believe that Adrik’s proposal has merit," he says, his tone contemplative. "But I also think that we should explore other options that are not simply based on defending our territory. We have been sending teams to the borders for months, yet it keeps yielding the same results. We may win against the rogue wolves, but we also lose valuable members of our pack in the process too.

"The rogue wolves pose a threat to us, but they are also a threat to other packs in the area. If we could ally ourselves with other packs, we could work together to find a solution that benefits everyone and lessens the overall threat. This could also give us an edge if we do have to defend ourselves."

I watch the other council members as they mull over his words. Some nod in agreement, while others remain skeptical. Nonetheless, I feel like an alliance is exactly what we need in other to move forward.

"Jacob makes a great point. We should reach out to nearby packs and see if we could form an alliance. As for the rogue wolves, send a diplomatic emissary first to have a peaceful talk and come into terms."

The council members nod in agreement, and the meeting continues, with everyone suggesting more ideas to the table.

The meeting wraps up soon, and everyone disperses to their various tasks for the day.

As I leave the council chambers, Adrik falls in step beside me. I can sense his probing gaze on me, and I know what’s coming. “Hey, Marco,” he says, his voice low and serious. “Are you okay? You seemed a little distracted during the meeting.”

I take a deep breath, trying to clear my head. Adrik is right. As the alpha of our pack, it’s my responsibility to be fully present during these meetings, to weigh the opinions of all those present, and make the best decisions possible for the good of our pack.

“I’m fine,” I say, keeping my tone light, even as an ache begins to build in my chest. “Just a little tired, that’s all.”

Adrik’s expression remains unconvinced. “Is there something else going on?” he asks. “I mean, you seemed really off. I would have thought you would take the day off to luxuriate in your newly mated status.”

I pause, not quite sure how to answer his question. I can’t tell him the truth about my relationship with Katina, or how I messed it up by acting on my feelings for her. I can’t risk damaging my relationship with Adrik or causing any discord within the pack, not when we have other stuffs to deal with.

“I’m just dealing with some personal stuff,” I say evasively. “It’s nothing to worry about.”

Adrik looks at me intently, his gaze searching. “You know you can always talk to me, right?” he says, his tone softening. “Whatever it is, I’m here for you.”

I nod, appreciating his support. Adrik might be my closest friend in the pack, and my confidante, but this is something I can’t share with him. “Thanks, Adrik,” I say, trying to sound as sincere as possible. “I appreciate that. But this is something that I have to deal with on my own.”

Adrik nods, his expression one of understanding. “Okay, man,” he says. “Just know that I’m here for you if you need me.”

As Adrik heads off in another direction towards the barracks, I can’t help but feel a sense of unease. Keeping the truth about Katina and I hidden from even my closest friend is starting to weigh on me. But I know that it’s for the good of the pack.

I take a deep breath, reminding myself of my responsibilities as an alpha. I need to focus on what’s best for the pack, protect our territory and our people, and ensure our continued prosperity.

But how do I do that, when my heart yearns for someone I can never have? When my focus is split in two different directions?