19. The Support of Women.

19. The Support of Women.
I try to comprehend what Miss De La Nuit means, however I am failing miserably. Edward is gone? But, he stated he was merely escorting Doctor Hawkins out. I am sure he holds me in too high a regard to abandon me in such a manner, this make no sense.


"Do not fret yourself, Miss Innes." Miss De La Nuit says as she approaches me with the bowl. "The young lord is unwed and will do as he pleases. Be thankful after your experience, this not you in his sights tonight."


"Wait, what?" I am immediately offended on Edward's behalf. "Edward is not like that, he would never!" I object.


"Your naivety will be your downfall. Granted he is not like other young men of his generation. No, Edward Sorrell is much worse." She answers so condescending, as though she has some kind of compassion for me.


But, I am forced to frown, her account of My friend is so far from the man I have become acquainted with. I am left wondering how to accuse and correct her accusations without endangering myself by exposing my own knowledge of her actions.


"Now," she interrupts my thoughts, "let's get you fed. By which point Mrs. Macrae should be here with the water, then you may bathe."


Her kind thoughtfulness startled me, and try as I might I am unable to think of an ulterior motive that may be an explanation for her actions. Marie De La Nuit has nothing to possibly gain by showing me kindness.


"Thank you, Miss De La Nuit," I offer genuinely.


"Enough of that, you must call me Kaleisha. We are both of us trapped here, and must be friends to one another. Kaleisha is my true name," she sighs, lifting a spoonful of broth to my lips. "It was the Duke who changed it, at the time he claimed it was to make others more accepting of me, yet why I should then be named like some French whore, I will never understand. Hateful man."


As I take the first mouthful, I am relieved at not needing to find the appropriate words to respond. For how does one respond to such statement.


"I apologise, Miss Innes. You have been through quite enough and do not need to bare my sorry history on your shoulders as well." She adds as I swallow.


"Kitty," I correct her gently, deciding that the anguish in her eyes is at least enough for me to offer her some sort of friendship, after all she is reaching out to help me. "My friends at home would call me, Kitty."


Kaleisha's smile lit up her entire face, and in that moment I realised how lonely this woman must be, how she has suffered with her losses, and how her entrapment here must weigh her down. I am determined to find a way to be her friend, I believe she and Edward have too much history for a repair in their relationship, so I will just have to be her friend in secret.


"Kitty, it shall be then. Now, eat up. You will need your strength." She affirmed, and with those words I was fed more and more broth until the bowl was completely empty.


"Better?" She asked.


"Much, thank you," I answer as I reach across for the small pill bottle.


I wince slightly at the reaching movement, before opening the bottle. I am instantly hit with various fragrant scents, from saffron to nutmeg. But, before I can identify anything else specific, never mind remove a tablet as the doctor instructed, Kaleisha has removed the bottle from my hands.


"I was instructed by Doctor Hawkins, to take one after I had eaten," I explain, expecting her to hand the bottle back.


"Are you in very terrible pain, Kitty?" Kaleisha asks me, frowning at the bottle in her hand.


"I am quite uncomfortable, but... what is this about? Why won't you give me them?" I ask her, my confused frustration leaking through into my voice.


"Do you know what these pills do?" She asks me, without answering.


My frustration is tampered by the embarrassment that swells when I realise I only have a vague response to offer her.


"Aid in my healing?" I did not mean for that to sound so much like a question.


"No." Is her stern response, just as the door knocks.

I watch as Kaleisha moves to open my bedroom door, allowing Mrs. Macrae to enter. She helps her carry the hot water over to the bathing tub in the corner. Mrs. Macrae paused, glancing over me with kindness before she followed and poured her large bucket into the tub. She then comes straight over to me, petting Chastity's sleeping form.when she approaches before taking my head in her hands. There is so much emotion on her face as she watches me for a full minute, before she departs to the closet to hunt out fresh clothes.


"Now, where were we?" Kaleisha's voice interrupts my thoughts as I watch the elder of the two. "Right, Laudanum. It will numb your body and your mind, putting you into a highly soporific state. Which in turn, will make you vulnerable." She explains further, and I fail to understand exactly how I could be more vulnerable than i was out on that hill.


"Vulnerable?" The question slips from my lips before I can stop it.


It is only when both women appear at my side, stilling my shivering body do I fully become aware of how the panic was rising in me. Mrs. Macrae is holding my hand and Chastity allows herself to be moved by Kaleisha, before the confounding woman takes her place by my side.


"You are safe for now, but please Kitty, trust our experience in this. As this house is not one to be without your wits." She explains, "I know you have suffered a terrible hardship, but any weakness of temper will only make you a target for more." Kaleisha added with a saddened sigh.


She sits stroking my hair as the tears build up in my eyes, despite her warning. How I long to go home; back to my over bearing parents, my chores on the farm, even my destroyed boat, because I am sure I could find a way to repair it and be out at sea again.


The thought of my boat only leaves me on more pain, because to be out at sea again, feeling the water swell beneath me as the gulls cry out overhead is all I want in this world. My chest is suddenly burdened with an aching emptiness, the accompanying chill is vast and unyielding. I am burdened with a sharp hiccup of breath as I try to find some relief.

But ther is none.


No relief can be found, when I am so unjustly trapped once again. Trapped within these walls, maybe even my own mind, because as much as I miss the comfort of home, the thought of journeying there terrifies me, and I am left with an unanswerable question.


How am I to remain strong, when I have become so weak?


Author's Note: I haven't proofread this fully, so I'm sorry for any wee typos etc. I just finished editing and you have all waited long enough. Hope you like it. B x.