Yzabelle.
I felt the searing pain slowly slicing my heart. I could not believe we had such a cruel destiny. I could not imagine myself killing the man I loved.
“I would never do that…” I whispered. I was certain about my words.
But I didn’t think Killian would believe that. He seemed to believe what the seer told him.
“The readings could not be wrong. But, if we do something to alter destiny, then maybe, the reading will not happen anymore.”
Now that he mentioned that, I guess I can understand his plans.
“Is that why you wanted to turn me into a lycan? You want me to back away from my destiny of being the Remus Pack’s luna?”
“I will not do that if you don’t want to.” Killian gazed at me, seeking to be understood. “That’s why I am telling you everything, all the possibilities. I will genuinely accept your decision and I will be happy with whatever your heart desires, Yzabelle.”
I could feel the sincerity in his words. I could tell he was telling the truth. He was letting me choose my fate. And I couldn’t believe this life. Were werewolves and lycans born just to play what roles the goddess has given us? Were we forbidden to choose our own fate? Wasn’t the goddess being too cruel to do that to us?
I thought she loved her children. Why did she have to make things hard for us if she really did love us?
And she was saying she favored me? If she favored me, why did I have to go through a lot of this?
No…
I was not going to follow the destiny she planned for me.
“You must be right,” I turned to Killian. “I wasn’t being punished, but my destiny was being controlled. And I don’t like it. I am supposed to choose and make my own fate.”
Killian gave me an intense look. It seemed to me he was holding his breath while waiting for my next words.
“I agree with your plan, Killian,” I announced, with full determination. I have made my choice and this is it. “Turn me into a lycan and let’s see what will lie ahead of me, ahead of us. I wanted to be with you, too. I am willing to turn my back from the destiny of being the Remus Pack’s favored luna.”
Killian’s lips broke into a nervous smile. I had never seen a confident big guy being nervous. But I understand how he felt. Of course, the plan was just experimental. We weren’t one hundred percent sure it would work.
But I wanted to gamble. Maybe, with this plan, I could escape the playful fate that the moon goddess had given me.
***
Yzabelle.
“We must go somewhere far away from human eyes,” Killian turned to me as he was positioned on the balcony. “Ride on my back, we need to get away from here.”
I nodded and followed what I was told. I rode on his back and the moment he jumped off the balcony, he transformed into his lycan form.
He was huge and bulky with shining black fur. I had never seen a magnificent transformation just how he did. It must be because he was the lycan prince. And there, I suddenly felt the burning need to be one like him.
‘Hold on tight,’ I heard him inside my head.
And I quickly hugged his enormous body. I was like a little kitten on his back, lying comfortably as he started to run to the wild.
Yeah. Even though I was in the city, there was still a place for wilderness. I had never been there before and didn’t feel the need to come here. Until now.
Killian slowly changed his pace and made slow strides. He stopped at the heart of the forest where the moon was still able to shine on us. He lowered down, so I could descend from his back. It was such a cold night and the breeze caused me nervousness.
But whatever happened tonight, I would never regret going with his plans. I didn’t want to be controlled anymore.
All my life, all I did was follow what I was told. Dad sealed his lips with Mom. I had always tried to understand him.
But it was a different thing now. I didn’t 'want to' understand him asking me to stay away from my mate. My life had always been a curse and I wanted to change the fate laid for me.
Killian transformed back to his human form. He was naked, wearing nothing but a boxer. He has always been handsome and I think his charisma doubled tonight.
“Are you ready, my luna?” He gently asked. I had never seen him this gentle. But tonight, he was.
I smiled at him, following with a courageous nod. Killian stepped towards me, positioned me on the spot where the moonlight could shine directly at me.
The moon was full and very bright. But I could sense danger. I didn’t know why I felt something wasn’t right. Yet, I didn’t want my emotions to win me over my goal.
‘This is it. I’m going to be his luna, and not the Remus Pack’s luna,’
Killian gently parted my hair on my back, showing my neck to him. I breathed out, composing myself.
“This will hurt, but you have to endure it. Fight the pain of the transformation and once you do, it will be over. You are going to be a lycan,” he whispered in my ear.
I could sense the nervousness in his voice. And I was dead nervous as hell. But as he said, I must get over the pain and it will be over.
“I trust you, Killian. Let’s get this done and over with,” I persuaded him.
He gently caressed my face, down my neck and traced my nape as he lowered down his face to the side of my neck. I suddenly felt a stinging pain the moment his fangs pierced my flesh. The pain started to intensify as the seconds passed by. I could feel his blood quickly entering my veins, blending with mine. It seemed to crossbreed something inside me.
I started to growl in pain as I felt my body slowly changing… transforming into something. I knelt down on the ground. I could not keep my feet standing steadily. I saw how my fingers were changing to claws…my body was starting to stretch. It was so painful!
“Hold it! Hold it, Yzabelle… endure it!”
I could hear Killian keeping me sane, but the pain was unbearable. My sight started to blur, my body started to weaken. It seemed like two genes were fighting inside my body, they both trying to dominate my body.
I felt my teeth start to grow into fangs. Fangs that were different from Killian’s and Corbin’s. Fangs that were similar to my grandparents… the King of the Darkness.
Oh my God! The blood of my father’s ancestors didn’t want to submit to the newcomers. It was fighting the transfusion and fighting against the transformation.
‘What should I do?’
“No! Fight it! Endure it, Yzabelle. You have to endure it!”
I saw how Killian started to panic.
“No, Yzabelle. Please, fight the pain. Endure it!”
He constantly reminded me to fight and endure suffering. But I could not. It’s too much to bear.
I looked him straight in the eyes while my vision kept on blurring. The transformation stopped.
“I… I am s-sorry,”
And everything was black.