Chapter 85 85
Her words kept echoing in his head. They also stabbed him in the heart like a sharp sword. He was lost of words at the moment.
'Stop saying you love me.'
'I don't want to love you.'
'I can't love you ever again.’
Brooke must have noticed that he was affected by her words because she maintained silence as well. She gave him time to digest the words she had just spoken to him.
After a few minutes of silence, Nathan finally let out a breath, which he didn't realize he was holding. "Why did you say all that, Bee? Is that how you really feel or does it have something to do with Ryan?" He said the last part through gritted teeth.
"No. Ryan has nothing to do with this. The reason he didn't tell you about Liam and my whereabouts was because I asked him not to." Brooke began to explain.
"I made him promise not to tell you and also not to update me about you at all. He also promised my father the same thing. That was the reason my father agreed to sign a contract with him." She sucked in a breath.
"Nathan, because of all these, that is why I decided to forgive you. I believe if you did wrong, I also played my part. You are not entirely to blame. But like I said, Ryan has nothing to do with what I said. Don't go back to Silverbrook and find another reason to turn him into a punching bag again." She warned.
"I admit, it was wrong of me to keep information about your son from you. But now that that is all cleared, are we good?" She asked.
Nathan was quiet again for a few more seconds, thinking. He eventually spoke again. "Bee, all those feelings you had for me for many years, you mean...... You don't have any now? You don't have any feelings for me? You mean.... You don't love me anymore?" He ignored all the Ryan aspect explanations she was given him. He was still stuck in that face that she said they cannot be together. That was the one that got to him most. He looked into her eyes with a sad expression. He waited for her response.
Brooke ultimately took a deep breath. She closed her eyes and shook her head. "No, Nathan. Not anymore. I don't love you. Not anymore." She revealed. Her voice was flat. There was no sign of anger or hesitation in her words. When she opened her eyes, Nathan couldn't find anything like regret or hesitation.
At that very moment, Nathan felt his whole world crumble. He swallowed a huge lump he felt in his throat. He was finding it hard to breathe as well. His mouth tasted bitter all of a sudden.
He recalled when Brooke would confess her love to him and he would tell her the same thing. Now that the table has turned, he wondered if that was how she felt each time he reminded her that he didn't love her.
At that moment, he felt bad again for hurting her so much in the past. He was selfish and only thought of himself. He didn't think of the pain he had caused a beautiful woman, such as herself. The same woman he loves and didn't even know he did. And now, the mother of his only child. He is the one being rejected by her now.
"Now, let's discuss Liam. That is why we are here after all." Brooke broke the silence. Changing the topic entirely. "Let's talk about how your visitation is going to be."
The awkwardness of their personal feelings and confession lingered for a while. But it gradually faded as they focused on the discussion of their son. The two parents tried to decide what was best for their son.
Nathan was to visit Liam every weekend while they are still on Emberwood. When he leaves for Silverbrook, he can visit Liam on weekdays when he decides to come to Emberwood. Then, Liam would spend the time with him while he is there. And he would also take him to school.
"The terms are fine by me, Bee. But we have to discuss the times Liam would be on holiday. Then, he has to come to Silverbrook and spend some time with my own side of the family." Nathan tried to reason with her.
Brooke was hesitant. She rubbed her temples, closing her eyes all together. She was holding back to give Nathan an answer to his last request.
"Bee, Liam is also my son." Nathan reminded her. "I have missed eight years of his life. Since I can't bring them back, I want to do all I can to make up for those missed years I wasn't there for him. Besides, you said we are going to make this arrangement in an easy way. Nothing has to be difficult."
"I know. I know." Brooke defended, waving both her hands off in the air. She puffed her cheeks before she continued. "It's just-" she was hesitant again. "It's just that Liam has never been away from me. Not even for a week and also not so far away from me."
Nathan listened but she just has to be considerate in his situation. He wished he could turn back time and start from the beginning of his son's existence. But that was not possible. So he has to take advantage of every second he can get with his son from now on.
"I - I will prepare myself for it when the time comes." She added.
"Thank you for understanding." Nathan said. "There is more." He added, getting Brooke's attention to look at him once more.
"What is that?" Brooke asked.
"I want Liam to have his last name changed to mine." Nathan said with confidence. "He is my son and a child of the Leo family . The heir to the family business someday." He reasoned.
Brooke couldn't find words to say. She opened and closed her mouth continuously.
"Bee, it was bound to happen and you know that." Nathan added with confidence. "We cannot change what it is."
Brooke sucked in a breath.