Olivia - Choking on I love you

Olivia - Choking on I love you
I couldn't meet his eye. Shame coursed through me. Billy knew about the one night stands. We pretended he didn't, but the doting brother that he was, of course he knew. Just the same, I hated him seeing me like this. It broke something in me every time I fell in his esteem. I knew what this must look like to him.

It's different this time, Billy. He's different for me.

"Come on man. She's had a long night. She was scared shitless. Of course I wasn't leaving her alone in a suite," Harmon said, moving to come towards me, tossing me a reassuring smile.

I beamed back at him, comforted by him not outing us the way I was on the verge of doing. He seemed to know now wasn't the time. Or maybe he decided —

"Right. Is that why my sister's naked under that robe? In a hotel suite with your half naked ass?" Billy raged, as he stared daggers at Harmon. "Stop fucking encouraging this shit, man."

When he was one foot away from me, Harmon hesitated. A frown marred his face, storms clouding over his stone cold eyes.

Say something. Say anything. Seconds felt like hours as he looked me up and down. The breath hitched in my throat as I wiped my nose with the sleeve of the robe.

His shoulders relaxed as he closed the gap between us.

I stared up at him through tear brimmed eyes and his arms wrapped around me.

"It's okay, Olive. Everything's okay," he said, one hand on my wet hair, the other rubbing circles on my back.

"Don't act like you don't know she's fucking obsessed with you," Billy snapped, watching our intimate moment play out.

I knew I should pull away. I was being too obvious. Apparently I always had been because somehow Billy already knew how I felt about Harmon. If Billy hadn't guessed what was happening between us, he wasn't far behind. What was the point in trying to hide anymore?

"So what? I'm obsessed with her too," Harmon deadpanned, kissing my temple and giving me a little squeeze.

Yes, I should have pulled away. Instead, I buried my face in Harmon's chest and sobbed like a child.

"Not the way she is with you. How many times have you woken up to her half naked in your bed in the last four years? She's a billionaire's sister and yet she's been working since she was eighteen just to be near you. It's all a game to her, Harmon. Even manipulating her way into this suite tonight. She's a Hunter through and through. She just wants a lay," Billy lashed out, making my heart constrict painfully.

Was this really his opinion of me? It seemed I didn't have to try so hard to save face after all. I was already a disappointment to him.

"Don't you fucking slut shame her, you manwhore. Where do you think she learned it from? We fucked everything in sight for years too. So what if she wants a lay? Maybe I want to give her one," Harmon thundered through gritted teeth, his hold on me tightening. "Or two. Several. An infinite number of fucks."

Conflicting emotions coursed through me, the heartbreak of Billy's words knocking me on my ass moments before Harmon's defensive ones made my heart soar.

Drowning in affection. I couldn't hide it if I tried. If my love for Harmon wasn't apparent before, it sure as shit was then. II clung to him desperately, raising my head cautiously to look up at him.

"Harmon," I said with a pout, choking on my sobs.

"Get away from my sister, Harmon," Billy's voice said threateningly as he took a step forward. "We're leaving, Olivia."

"Fucking think before you speak, you dick," Harmon seethed. "She thinks you walk on water. All she wants is to make you proud. She's spent years working for your company to fucking impress you, not me. She never needed to impress me. She knows that. You want to be pissed at me? That's fine. I fucked up. I own that. But don't you fucking talk about her like that," he said, cupping my face with his hands and wiping away the tears with the pads of his thumbs.

"We talked about this four years ago, Harmon. The first time I found her naked in your bed. You gave me your word. You're never fucking my sister. Get the fuck away from her," Will raged, his words blowing up my perception of the last four years as he came towards us.

God help me. No saving me from you, daddy. Just like you said.

"He told you not to fuck me," I mumbled, the words tumbling from my lips.

The sobbing came to a grinding halt. My eyes searched Harmon's. His brown orbs reflected the love bombs going off inside me. Smoldering, unabashed love washed over me.

"It wouldn't have mattered if he said it or not, Olive. I wouldn't have…" Harmon declared gently, trailing off moments before Billy was upon us.

You can't say it, can you, daddy? You fucking know it's not true.

Doubt. Guilt. Conflicted eyes. Struggling with himself. Had he been looking at me that way for four years? Did I miss it? I was so sure he would say no if I asked him out for real. If I told him how I felt.

You really have been obsessed with me for years, haven't you daddy? Just as obsessed as I am with you.

"Why would you tell him not to fuck me? I'm not a fucking child, Billy. I can make my own decisions," I snapped, once again sounding like a spoiled, ungrateful brat, but I didn't care.

The irony was had Billy not gotten involved, I probably wouldn't have turned into a whore.

There would have been only you, daddy.

How many sleepless, lonely nights did Billy's meddling cause me? Cause us?

"You gave me your word you weren't trying to fuck him. I guess we were both liars. He's a womanizer, Olivia. He just threw Macy away for some chick he barely knows. Now he's half naked in a hotel suite with my sister. That's not even all. He's a killer. A criminal. Even if you didn't just want a fuck, even if you had real feelings for him, he's not safe for you, Olive," Billy mouthed off once more, laying the cold, harsh truth out for me in no uncertain terms.

It didn't matter. Left her for me. He let his past go to be a better man. My foolish, yearning heart convinced me that was for me too. So he could stay in my life.

"Ouch," I complained with a grimace as Billy grasped my injured arm.

Harmon deserved to be defended too. To have me in his corner too. Something stopped me.

So all about you, daddy. Say you love me, damn it. Say it after all. Why won't you say the words like your actions do?

"You're hurt? You let him close enough to hurt her?" Billy asked in horror, yanking the sleeve of my robe down to unveil my injured arm. "For fuck's sake, Harmon. This time her arm. Next time—"

The dread on Billy's face made Harmon falter. The pit in my stomach engulfed me. Now or never. Say something.

You're everything to me too. That's the problem. The words won't stop if I speak about us, daddy.

I'm choking on I love you.

"There won't be a next time," said Mr. Inconsequential.

Harmon took the sleeve out of Billy's hand and pulled it back up slowly. He stared at my injured arm, a faraway look in his eye.

A chill went down my spine as I watched him readjust the robe. The hand cupping my face dropped. The mood in the atmosphere shifted. Harmon refused to meet my eye as he took a step back.

"I'll make the arrangements. You're right. She's not safe with me. Take her home," said Harmon's no nonsense, this was final, chilly, voice.