56 - The Ruins
56 - The Ruins
~Frederick’s Point of View~
I sigh, looking down at the gas meter, it’s nearly at the end. When I see a service station up ahead with a diner, I decide to finally stop. My lycan can run for hours and refuel from eating, but driving is so different. It’s barely been five hours and I’m exhausted.
Yeah well, I like food, my wolf, Xavier says, with a yawn. I can only smile, still having to get used to the other voice in my head though he’s been with me awhile now.
Once I’m seated in the diner and looking at the menu, I nearly ask myself what the hell I’m doing. Is this really just a fool’s errand I’m on? An excuse to get away for a bit? Maybe both.
I don’t fully get it, but I haven’t seen anywhere outside of the pack so I say a little trip is a good thing, my wolf replies.
“What can I get you hun,” I hear, as I turn to look at the waitress. Even seated I’m still nearly as tall as she is standing.
“Coffee, black and the special please. Very rare on the burger,” I say, putting the menu back.
Just as she leaves, the door opens and since I’m facing it, I look up. My jaw falls when I see Hannah’s brothers stumbling in, yawning and stretching. I could have sworn I kept picking up on something but my lycan didn’t stir or act threatened in any way.
I immediately shake my head but honestly wonder if I’m surprised. We’d spent a good bit of time together as of late. They both are too eager to learn all they can and the pack supports that. Rafe and Parker spend time with them at the training fields and I take them and other pups in the woods for survival skills.
“Got room for two more in there,” Oscar asks, as they both throw themselves into my booth. I lean back and spread my arms against the back of it.
“Just couldn’t help yourselves huh,” I say, keeping a straight face. My wolf beams, since he greatly likes the boys.
“Come on uncle Freddy! You love us and you know it,” Oliver says, grinning for all he’s worth. They’re some cute kids, I have to admit. If my children had lived, I like to think they’d be like them. Strong sense of adventure but also cautious and compassionate.
“Won’t your girlfriend miss you,” I tease. Xavier practically snorts.
They both immediately blush and then look a bit guilty.
“Jane helped us leave a note,” Oscar shrugs, like it isn’t a big deal. But I know Hannah and Scarlett must be quite pissed off. Jane. Should have known she was in on it. She absolutely didn’t want me to go alone.
I sigh and wave for the waitress so they can get some food too. Before I know it, they’ve got me in a fit of laughter and my sour mood is lightened. They’re both just so optimistic, so excited about literally everything. It’s very hard not to get pulled into their little orbit. Even if I feel like it’s akin to a fantasy, it is a welcomed escape from reality. Living through the eyes of a child.
It’s been unbelievable to have Xavier to talk to, but he’s so young and so sheltered. He can’t possibly comprehend what life has been for Jane and I. I’m glad he won’t have to know it though, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
It’s nearly four days before we make it to the site. With the boys, it’s easy to get waylaid, distracted. But somehow, I didn’t mind it so much. I’ve spent so damn much time alone, and certainly away from children. They’re hard to say no to and really, I can’t remember laughing so much. It’s a rare thing for me certainly.
Sure enough all that’s left of the brothel are piles of burnt wood, other scattered things. There’s still two pole lights working, though it’s not dark yet.
“Be careful, you could step on something and fall in, get a cut or worse. I’d tell you not to go explore it but I know you won’t listen,” I say, as we begin to move around. It’s an hour from sunset, and while I’d certainly be fine out here in the dark, I won’t let them be subject to a desert at night.
Ohhh I’ve always wanted to fight a rattlesnake, Xavier says, wagging his tail.
No… You certainly do not, I scold, knowing how naive he still is.
Though I’ve always felt a large responsibility to watch over and care for any pack that took Jane and I in, with these boys it’s just somehow so different. Maybe it’s the fact that they’ll never know their father. Maybe that’s a role I could see myself filling for them. I also feel a fatherly instinct over my wolf, though he fights me on it.
Two hours later, we’d found a whole lot of nothing. It was obvious that after the Barclay pack left, others had picked over the area. It wasn’t as if we were searching for money or jewels. Seeing the rubble, I realized I’m just searching for something that doesn’t exist. Maybe I just needed a true visual confirmation that the Rhodes clan is in fact just a memory now.
“Let’s hit the hay uncle Freddie. It’ll all still be here tomorrow,” Oliver says, patting my arm.
I nod, and drive the truck about ten minutes back into the desert, so it isn’t glaringly obvious that’s why we’re there.
Once we all get settled into the bed, I find I don’t even mind sharing it with them though it’s a very tight squeeze. I can’t even remember the last time I shared a bed with anyone outside of Jane. Hearing their giggles, even the way they banter with each other. It’s so basic and simple yet so far removed from what my life has become. I find that I want to be a fly on the wall around them, and I think they must think that about me as I drift off.
My eyes pop open, fully alert. My lycan stirs and tells me there’s a threat. The boys are out cold, their breathing even and steady. I relax my mind and within seconds hone in on another heartbeat. It’s a wolf. At that, Xavier perks right up.
While everything should be telling me to stay put, stay in the safety of the truck… that isn’t how lycans think. Rush toward the danger, extinguish it. That’s how our brains are wired and it could be absolutely deadly for a relatively new wolf. When Xavier takes over, my lycan is subdued and I can’t tap fully into his abilities.
I hadn’t even taken off my boots, so within seconds I find myself slowly pacing outside the vehicle. I open all my senses, and inhale a sharp tart apple which is completely out of place in a desert.
Then a light goes off in my head.
It’s a she-wolf.