Chapter 161 161
"L-Luca..." I cleared my throat. "How are you?" I asked calmly and gave him a faint smile.
Luca remained staring at me; I couldn't read what was on his mind. I couldn't tell what he was feeling now... His eyes, they're still lifeless.
"What the hell are you saying?" he asked and smiled bitterly. He remained staring at me as if I were just an illusion in his sight.
"H-Huh?" I asked, I honestly don't know what to say.
"Why the hell are you smiling at me as if you've forgiven me already?" he rasped. His voice alone says something about the life he's been living for the past years... What happened to him?
"I-I've forgiven you," I just managed to say while looking at him... His eyes are dim as if his body is about to collapse at any moment... It's like he's so sleepy.
Luca chuckled humorlessly. "H-How did you even do that? How did you forgive the man who killed our child?" he asked and held on to the table when he was about to fall.
I swallowed and gripped my bag tightly... Oh, right. He still thinks our child is gone.
All this time, he's still suffering from it? I thought he's now living a happy life. I thought he had already forgotten about it, about me, about our child... but here he is. He's not even himself right now... He must be suffering like hell for the past 6 years.
"L-Luca..." I feel like my tongue is getting caught... I also don't know what I should say to him. I just swallowed and sighed. "I-It's not your fault," I mumbled in a soft voice.
Luca didn't answer anymore. He just shook his head and turned his back on me, then walked unsteadily out of the eatery. I just bit my lower lip and held my arm... I want to know... Did my words back then haunt him until now? The harsh words I said to him before, the way I blamed him for what happened, those words that left him six years ago... are they still stabbing his heart until now?
I looked at Luca. I immediately ran closer to him when I saw him completely lose his balance and sit on the floor. I was about to help him, but a car stopped in front of us. A man got out of it who I remember was Luca's friend... It was Cadmus.
"Tsk tsk tsk... You're still doing this, huh, Falcone," he said, shaking his head, then he bent down and helped Luca stand up.
Cad looked at me when he put Luca's arm around his shoulder. He gave me a weird smile and waved his hand at me.
"Hi, Crescent... I didn't expect to see you here. What a surprise," Cad said.
He doesn't look surprised at all.
"I-I also didn't expect to see you here," I just said and looked away from him.
Cad opened the car door in the back seat and just pushed Luca in there. I was startled by what he did, especially when I heard Luca hit his head. He didn't complain and just remained asleep... It looks like he's really, really drunk.
"Crescent, do you want to come with me to take Luca to his unit?" Cad asked and wiggled his eyebrows playfully.
I shook my head and forced a smile. "I'm sorry, but I have to go now."
"Ah, is that so? Too bad," he just said and tapped his fingers on the roof of his car.
"Um... can I ask why you're here in Batangas?" I asked; I don't know why my hands are getting cold while facing Cadmus.
Cad chuckled. "You already asked," he just said. "Just kidding. It's just... I think Luca needs the air from Batangas to get better. I didn't do anything for six years for him because he didn't want me to, but I can't take it anymore... And then, just last week, I found out that Luca just needed the air from Batangas. So I dragged him here." Cad said with a grin, then put his hands in his pockets.
I don't understand what he's trying to say, but I don't know why I'm getting nervous from what he's saying. It's as if those words have a meaning that I can't figure out.
Cad chuckled and scratched his eyebrow. "So, we'll go ahead now. See you when I see you," he said and waved his hand before he went inside his car.
I just watched their car drive away. I held on to my bag and bit my lower lip... I really want to ask Cad what's happening to Luca, but I didn't have the courage.
A part of me is scared... scared that it's my fault why Luca became like that.
I couldn't get what I saw out of my mind until I got home. I just sighed and took a shower, then changed my clothes before checking on Vanna in her room. After that, I just hung out on the veranda... I just smiled when I saw Aiden arrive. He really can't stand not seeing us even for just one day.
"Hi, love..." He sat beside me and kissed my cheek.
He held my hand and pulled me up. He had me sit on his lap and wrapped his arms around my waist. I just hugged him back and buried my face on his neck... His smell is comforting. It's not that strong, but when I smell it, it's like I'm being pulled to sleep.
"Aiden... I saw him," I mumbled and distanced my face. I stared at his handsome face.
"Who?" he asked; he gently caressed my waist.
"Luca."
He was obviously stunned by what I said, but he didn't look angry or annoyed. He sighed, then held my hand and gently squeezed it... "What did you feel? Did you feel anything?" he asked.
I just smiled and gave him a soft kiss on his lips. "Are you asking if I felt something romantically?" I asked in a teasing tone.
Aiden avoided my gaze and bit his lower lip. "Well... you loved him so much before."
I chuckled and hugged his nape. "I didn't feel anything, Aiden. My heart didn't beat faster, and I didn't feel butterflies in my stomach like you were expecting." I pinched his cheek. "If I felt anything... it was pity," I sighed.
Aiden looked at me. "Why do you pity him?"
"He's different now, Aiden. It seems like he wasn't happy for the past six years. He really looks miserable... and suffering. I-I'm thinking that maybe, it's my fault for saying harsh words to him before. If I think about it carefully, Luca didn't do anything wrong back then. I don't want him to suffer like that anymore," I said in a low voice and stared at Aiden's chest.
Aiden caressed my cheek and kissed the back of my hand. "If you don't want him to suffer anymore, then you have to tell him the truth about Vanna... can you do that though?" he asked while staring at me.
I bit my lower lip. "I-I have no courage to do that... To be honest, I'm scared," I whispered.
"If that's the case, then you can't do anything about it. Just let him stand and heal on his own. He probably won't be like that forever," he just said.
"But I can't help but feel guilty, Aiden," I sighed. "If ever, is it okay if I talk to him? I'll just tell him that I already forgive him and that what happened wasn't his fault... so he can also move on with his life properly," I whispered and played with the collar of Aiden's shirt.
Aiden sighed and smiled at me. "Of course, you can do that. If that will make you feel better, I won't stop you... Well, just--just don't make me jealous," he whispered, then buried his face in my neck.
I just laughed and stroked his hair. "I already told you, there's nothing there anymore. I've moved on from Luca for a long time. When I saw him, I really didn't feel anything but pity," I explained.
It's really true. I've had no feelings of love for Luca for a long time, and that didn't change even after I saw him again. I would be lying if I said I didn't try to check if I still had feelings for him earlier... I felt myself, and I really didn't feel anything but pity and regret. I was angry at him before, but I don't want him to drown in regret forever.
"You don't have to ask permission from me regarding that... um, maybe just don't get too close to him," Aiden said, laughing.
I just laughed too and playfully hit his chest. "Jealous."
Aiden just pulled me into a tight hug and caressed my hair. "You can do anything you want, whatever you're comfortable with... Just don't forget that you love me," he whispered.
I just smiled and hugged him back tightly. "Of course... I love you, Aiden."
"I love you so much too, Cres.”