Chapter 144 The same person, right?

Chapter 144 The same person, right?

Carlino's POV

Morning came too quickly. I hadn't slept a wink, and work was the furthest thing from my mind. I just stayed holed up in my room, drinking and smoking the hours away. By now, I knew Lina had to be awake.

I sniffled, setting the glass down on the table and stubbing out the cigarette in the overflowing ashtray.

What the hell had I become? A man the entire underworld feared to cross was now terrified of facing the woman he loved. I let out a harsh, bitter laugh. The great Carlino Silvio Lacentra was reduced to nothing. The very throne that gave me absolute power had destroyed me. And the worst part? That throne was the only life I had ever known.

God damn it.

The rage built up inside me, surging through my veins until my chest burned with it. If only… I grabbed the glass beside me and hurled it against the wall, watching it shatter.

"No!" The scream ripped from my throat.

"Father, you’re the root of all of this. You’re the cancer rotting me from the inside out. You took everything from me, even while you were rotting in that fucking wheelchair." I yelled at the ceiling, my hands shaking. "Your sins followed me until they became my own!"

I laughed loudly, running my fingers through my hair. "Who am I even talking to? You? All my life, you were nothing but a controlling motherfucker. I just didn't see it soon enough. If I had the chance now..."

I stumbled toward the bar to pour another drink, but the movement ground to a halt. The pain was suffocating. Years of bottling it up, years of carrying the weight of his legacy, and it was finally exploding.

"...I would rip your head off your neck and watch you bleed to death."

With a blind sweep of my arm, I cleared the table. Bottles and glasses flew to the ground, shattering into a million pieces. The room instantly filled with the sharp stench of alcohol, sharp shards scattering across the floor.

My knees buckled. I sank to the floor, crouching among the wreckage, and realized my face was wet. I was crying.

It wasn't just the pain of losing my mother, my brother, and my own damn soul. It was knowing I had two daughters out there whom I couldn't even look in the eye. I had a woman—the mother of my children—who I had to hide from, who couldn't know the monster who ruined her life was the one before her eyes. Being alive but forced to live like a ghost? It was no different than being dead.

"God..." I sobbed.

It felt foreign. I was never taught how to cry. According to my ideal father, a real man didn't feel. “Emotions are for the weak,” he’d say.

I let out a breath, wiping my face. I couldn't stay in this room anymore. Trying to maintain the cold, untouchable mask everyone expected of me was getting too difficult to uphold.

I wiped my tears away and forced the emotionless mask back onto my face.

As I struggled to my feet, a knock echoed at the door. I walked over heavily. Every bone in my body screamed for rest, but I couldn't stop. Not when I was this close to closing the deal.

I opened the door to find Aiden standing there, hands crossed in front of him, holding a couple of files. The moment he looked at me, his face dropped, his eyes widening.

"Carlino, what happen—" he started, but I brushed him off, leaving him at the threshold as I walked back into the room. He followed me inside, looking around in horror. "What in the fucking world happened here, Carlino?"

"What does it look like?" I asked coldly, reaching for another cigarette and lighting it.

"Carl—"

I scoffed, exhaling a thick cloud of smoke. "Should we get going to the site?"

"But—"

"There is no 'but,' Aiden. When we move out, call room service to get this shit cleaned up. Oh, and any news on Lina?"

He let out a defeated sigh. "Yes. She’s... she went to meet the same colleague from work. My guy said she looked... disheveled."

Another bitter laugh escaped me. "I don't want to cross paths with her at her workplace. Tell her boss to meet us at the site so we can sign the paperwork and get out of here. I'll be out in a few minutes. Let me change."

"Roger that, Boss," he said, turning on his heel and walking out.

\~~~

The deal was closed. The site was inspected, and the documents were signed. By the time we finished it was already evening. I couldn't bring myself to leave San Diego without seeing my girls one last time. This might be the end of the road for me here, I had no intention of ever coming back.

"Aiden, we're leaving tomorrow morning. 10 o'clock sharp. I have one last thing to take care of first," I said, blowing a ring of smoke into the evening air.

"Okay. I'll handle the flight arrangements."

"Thanks, Aiden." I stared out the window as the sky began to turn to twilight.

"No problem, bro," he replied, sliding his eyes back to his phone. I caught the subtle smirk on his face. He knew damn well I hated being called 'bro,' and he was waiting for the reaction.

Fine, you're getting nothing out of me today, I thought, a small smile tugging at my lips. He knew me too well—sometimes better than I knew myself.

A sharp pang of regret hit me. I still hated myself for the day I cut him off. He had only been trying to talk me out of manufacturing that drug. The same drug that ended up destroying…

Fuck.

"Carlino," Aiden called out, breaking my spiral. "Stop overthinking. Want to grab dinner out tonight?"

"No, just grab me a takeout on your way back." I gave him a faint smile.

When we finally returned to the hotel, I went straight to my room to freshen up. Room service had done their job; the broken glass and spilled liquor were gone, replaced by fresh bottles on the table. The room was immaculate, showing no trace of the breakdown from this morning.

I changed quickly and headed toward Lina's place on foot. But as I approached, I saw her and the kids stepping out of the house. I kept my distance, trailing them quietly through the streets just to keep them in my sight a little longer.

They led me to an outdoor park not far from her neighborhood, a lively place filled with families. When my Tesoro and the kids walked through the gates, I stayed back, lingering near the entrance. I lit a cigarette, watching from the shadows as my baby girls ran around, their laughter carrying over to where I stood.

Lina sat on a bench nearby. Even from this distance, I could see the exhaustion weighing her down. Her eyes followed Rotha and Erla, but her mind was clearly miles away. She was thinking about last night; I could tell. My heart ached—a sharp, physical pain—seeing her trapped in that emotional turmoil.

I had gotten what I came for. I needed to leave before she noticed me.

I turned to walk away, but a tiny, soft hand clamped around my fingers. I froze and looked down. It was Rotha. She was staring up at me, wide-eyed. I immediately dropped my cigarette and crushed it under my shoe, cursing myself for smoking around them.

"You're the same person, right?" Rotha asked softly.

I stood there, completely paralyzed. This was the second time I had been this close to my own daughters.

"Huh?" I muttered, my mind blanking out.

"The man from school," Rotha explained, her voice innocent. "The one who fought the bad uncle."

"No..." I tried to lie.

"Yes, it's him, Rotha," Erla chimed in. "He has the same eyes and face as me. I didn't tell Mama like I promised," she added with a little giggle.

Hearing that laugh pierced through me, she had my features, but that laugh belonged entirely to her mother.

"Mama!" Rotha yelled out, turning back toward the bench.

Panic flared in my chest. I tried to gently pull my hand back to escape, but both of them held tight. Before I could break free, a shadow fell over us.
Lina was standing right behind me.