Chapter 10 Zemirah.

Chapter 10 Zemirah.
Zemirah.

The SUV was smooth and expensive, it looked like it could cost more than some people's houses. I sat still with Detlef, his jacket still dropped over my shoulders, his hand rested on the seat between us.

I looked out the window at the pitch darkness running past, there were trees, more trees, I didn't recognize the road, I'd never been there before.

My hands wouldn't stop shaking.

"You're going into shock." Fernandez's voice was low, he was being really careful with me.

"I'm fine." I said

"You're not fine. You've been under the influence of this unknown drug for a whole day, you can't possibly be fine.

I could have argued, but I didn't have the strength to, my lips stayed shut. Besides, he was right.

The car hit a bump, I flinched.

Nandez noticed. "Do you want me to tell you where we are going?"

"Does it matter?"

"Well it might to you." He said with conviction.

I turned from the window to look at him, he'd changed in three years. The young boy from the bar was gone, this one had sharper angles, his blue hair was still present and beautiful but Shorter. The stud in his ear caught the dim light from the dashboard.

His eyes were still the same, warm and honey brown.

"I'm taking you to my pack," he said. "The Phoenix pack, it's in the mountains, about four hours from here, you'll be given your own room, you'll have your own space, nobody will touch you with your permission."

"Your pack."

"Does your pack know about me?"

"Some of them, the ones whom I felt worthy of knowing."

"Your fiancée?"

The question struck a nerve, I saw Nandez's expression change.

"She knows I've been on a look out for someone, she just doesn't know who."

"What will you tell her?"

"I have no idea yet," he ran his hand through his hair, depicting cluelessness.

I turned back to the window. " You should have thought about it before showing up with your men."

"Zemirah-"

"You can't just take me with you because you feel guilty in your heart that you left me that morning and you've been searching for me ever since, now you found me, so everything should be fixed suddenly.

"I don't think everything is fixed, we need to do something, anything."

"Then what do you think? What exactly is this? I gestured between us.

Fernandez was silent for a short moment.

"I spent three whole years wondering what happened to you, wondering if you were safe, if I'd ever see you again.

So when I saw you at that restaurant and saw you sprawled on that couch" he paused, catching his breath.

My chest ached, his words were creating a soft soft in my heart, even after all these years.

"You left," I whispered.

"I know how that feels I'm sorry"

"You didn't leave a note or a number."

"I waited for hours thinking you'd come back, I was so stupid." I said, fighting back tears.

"You weren't stupid. You were-"

"What? Young? Naive? Easy?"

"No, you were beautiful." He said as he held out his hands to me, I should have pulled away, but I didn't.

"You... When I looked at you, I saw Bravery, and beauty and I was too much of a coward so I left and it hurts now, I want to make it up to you if you let me.

I shook my head. "You can't make up for it now, it's too late."

"I'm not oblivious of that."

He didn't let go of my hand, after a moment I stopped trying to pull away.

\------

The drive took hours, I think I slept off at some point, because when I opened my eyes, the darkness had softened to gray- early morning. The lane had changed too, it became a bit wider, clearer and smoother, with beautiful street lights that cast orange pools across the asphalt.

"We are almost there." Fernandez's voice sounded exhausted. He didn't sleep throughout the long ride, I could tell from the dark circles under his eyes.

I sat up, I winced as I got up, I could still feel the pain from everything that had happened, the burning had stopped, but my bone ached.

"Where exactly is it?" I asked.

"My territory. It's borderline is about five minutes out, after we cross it, it'll take another twenty minutes to get to the main House."

Fernandez smiled. He looked really tired. "You'll see."

There were no markings or any sign of identification at the border, just trees and a sign that had an Italian write up. The atmosphere changed as we drove it, it was as hot as a heater.

The mountains rose on both sides as we drove through, and nestled in the valley below was a whole city, it didn't look like a pack, lights dotted the hillsides in clusters, they were connected by roads. In the middle, complex buildings.

"Where's this place?" I asked.

"This is my home." Fernandez sounded proud. "The Phoenix pack has been here for over three hundred years. Before that our ancestors lived in the upper caves. But our Coast's have enlarged.

I pressed my face against the window to see a clearer view, the city sprawled beneath us, it was quiet, well it was the early hours of the morning. I saw the view of the houses, shops, a building that looked like a school, a big square with a fountain at its center, and a ten thousand seater stadium.

"It's beautiful."

"You have nothing to worry about, it's safe." He was trying to reassure me. "Everything that happens within these borders, I control it."

I looked at him, he looked alert, ready and aware, this was the type of man that builds and protects.

"What do you want from me, Nandez?"

He turned towards me. "There's nothing I desire now, more than your healing, eat you, sleep well and most importantly, not be in fear, and when you're ready you can tell me what you want."

"What if I don't know what I want?"

"Then we'll both wait until you do."

This was the kindest thing anyone had said to me in a long time.

The SUV slowly went down the lane, into the valley, the city view was closer and clearer and even more detailed, I could see people now, moving through the streets, a woman opening a shop, a man taking a walk with his dog, children running toward a school, just the usual hustle and bustle.

Nothing looked abnormal.

We passed through a gate, my attention was divided So I didn't notice when we went through it , we drove down to a complex at the center. The buildings were older, the stone looked smoothly worn out showing the passing of time.

Gardens bloomed on each side of the road, the flowers looked beautiful, I didn't know their names.

The SUV stopped, Nandez got out first, then came around to my door, as he opened it, he offered his hand.

I took it.

My legs almost gave out when I got up. The hours sitting in the car made my feet swollen, the cold morning air made me shiver, despite the fact I had on a thick jacket, Nandez steadied me, one hand around my waist, the other hand holding mine.

"Take it easy, I got you."

I allowed him to hold me, he guided me up the stairs and through the door, the door was secured, it opened without Nandez touching it.

By the look of this place, I could tell how much wealth, power and affluence he had.

The inside was warm, soft lights, I perceived a sweet smelling aroma, someone was cooking somewhere around. A woman appeared at the end of the hallway, dressed in a casual uniform, her silky gray hair packed in a high bun.

"Alpha." She bowed her head. "We didn't know you'd show up today."

"The plans changed, this is Zemirah, she'll be with us for a while."

She looked at me with kind eyes. "Welcome miss, can I get you anything?" She asked. "A food, a bath?"

I meant to say I was fine but I said, "a bath please" instead.

She smiled. "I'll have one prepared, your room is ready."

She disappeared down the hallway, I watched her leave.

"Your room." I repeated after her.

"You'd need your privacy." Fernandez led me down the hallway, past doors and paintings and a staircase that kind of curved upwards. "It's at the end of this wing, my room is located at the other end, you don't have to see me, unless you choose to.

We stopped in front of a door, dark wood, simple handle, he stepped back, letting me go in first.

The room had warm, cream-colored walls, a bed with a pile of blankets, a small fireplace cracked in the wall, and fresh flowers by the window.

It looked nothing like my room at home, and nothing like the omega quarters, cozier than the dungeon and red room.

This was perfection

I walked to the window, the glass was cold.

"Thank you." "I'm indebted to you, I'm glad you came for me."

Fernandez was standing in the doorway, he hadn't entered yet, I realized he was waiting for my permission.

"I should have come sooner, he wouldn't have had the opportunity to harm you. I should have-”

"We can't change what has happened, it's already part of my story, let's just move forward."

He just stood staring at me. Then he nodded.

"If there's anything you need, tell Elara. That's the name of the woman that just left here, she'll make you have whatever you need.." he walked back into the hallway. " Make sure you rest okay, you're safe now."

He closed the door, I heard his footsteps fade down the hallway.

I like how he kept reassuring me of my safety.

I stood in the middle of the room, I was enamored by the warmth, and the flowers, the soft blankets. This was a type of feeling I hadn't experienced in a long time.

My mind went back to Detlef, the way he'd looked at me when I chose Fernandez, he looked broken and hollow.

I sank onto my bed, pulling my knees to my chest, I pulled the jacket and slid under the blanket.

I was in this stranger's house whom I gave my body to three years ago, putting his clothes on, I was supposed to appreciate and feel safe.

Instead I felt like I'd just been traded from one cage to another.

A sudden knock on the door made me flinch. Elara's voice came through. "Your bath is ready, miss, in the room to your left."

I didn't respond.

After a moment, her footsteps retreated.

I sat there and watched the sun rise over the mountains, painting the room with shades of gold and yellow. The fire crackled, the blankets smelt like lavender.

I don't know what happened but I got emotional and teared up.

Neither for Detlef nor Fernandez, not for the miscarriage I had before I even got to know I was pregnant, or th
e father who'd sold me, or the life I'd never get back.

I wept for myself, I missed the girl I used to be, I was sunshine, I loved to laugh, snuck out to parties, I once believed in love, fate and happy endings.

Now that girl is gone, it hurts that I might never find her again.