Chapter 15

" Helena your sister and father stand at the end of the stairwell waiting for you, we are all waiting on you ! "

I hear my mom on the other side of my room door once more but stand frozen as I cant stop staring at the woman In front of me for I have never seen her before...

Reaching out I run a finger down the glass infront of me that held my reflection within it in disbeleif before taking that same hand and raising it up to grace it upon my hair that was pinned and twisted to perfection so I could feel it, touch it, just to make sure I wasnt dreaming the woman that stood before me

I slide either one of my hands down the front of my waist to feel the fabric beneath my own palms that began to become slightly damp with my own sweat and do a small sway to my left than my right to look at either side of my dress.

The delicate silver necklace that decorated my neck glistened under the light as I swayed, I admired the jewelry for the night as it was all muted in a way but still called for your attention. Nothing taking away from my dress but more so complimenting it.

The door opened quietly behind Helena her mother prepared to hasten her daughter but quickly changed her mind when her eyes landed on Helena. With a wave of her hand Helenas mother ushered her lady in waiting to send her oldest and her husband off, for they could meet them at the ball. Although confused her husband did not question it and without another word Emilia and her father were in their carriage and on their way to the Churchill ball. Meanwhile Helenas mother stood in awe of her daughter and the glow that spread through the room, Braelia took notice of Helenas mother and gave a small nod followed by a courtsey they were quickly in an understanding that niether of them wanted to interupt the moment happening in front of them. Helena stood in admiration of herself as if she was the only one in the room, she felt as if she was. Nothing else mattered to her and nothing else was running through her mind for the first time in what felt like ever, she felt so breathtakingly beautiful. Helenas mother held back her tears and began to walk slowly in Helenas direction, with a hand on her chest she took a deep breath before speaking up.

" Oh... Helena... "

Was all she could muster out, she never whitnessed her youngest truly embrace her own beauty and for a mother it is one of the most rewarding feelings. Almost in slow motion Helena looked to her mother briefly and her face brightened almost immediately, looking back at the mirror that stood in front of her Helena finally responded to her mother.

" I dont recognize this girl that stands in front of me mother... "

My hands rest upon the front of my dress as I return to staring at myself in disbelief, my mother makes her way to me to rest her hands upon my shoulders and she appears in the mirror behind my own reflection.

" Helena darling, you look absolutely stunning and that dress flatters you in the best ways "

I lay my right hand upon the hand she rested on top of my shoulder and give her a light squeeze in response, to which she sighs.

" I mean it Helena, I do not speak a single Lie "

I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Every negative emotion and every insecurity I ball up together then with one gulp I swallow it all down, straighten out my posture and raise my chin.

" Im ready mother "

Choosing not to await her response I turn on my feet and make my way out of the room, keeping my mind focused on fueling the confident mindset I put myself in by force. I still take my time but dont move too slowly, I hear footsteps following close behind me and just assume Braelia and my mother chose to follow me out. Collectively we make our way down the stairs and to the front door, before stepping out of the hosue I take a quick pause and close my eyes once more shoving all the thoughts to the back of my head I choose to just ignore myself entirely. With one deep breath I move my feet once more to make my way to the carriage that awaits for us. Im the first to step into the carriage and situate myself with my mother following shortly. We sit in silence and I could tell my mother wanted to speak but she was hesitant so she distracted herself with whatever caught her eyes outside the carriage. Looking down at my fingers that lay fiddling in my lap all things around me begin to move in slow motion, my mind locks focus on my hands as I fight to keep all my thoughts at bay good or bad. Withought realizing it my foot began to tap against the carriage causing my whole leg to bounce up and down, no matter how hard i fought against the thoughts they still found a way to affect me and flood my mind. My mind comes to a hault almost as quickly as it began as I feel my mother rest her hand upon my leg, in attemot to stop it from bouncing up and down. I shoot my eyes up at her and we share a weak smile between eachother but before I could even speak

" We have arrived to the Churchill ball my lady "

I hadnt even realized that the carriage came to a stop and now the door is open. My mother rubs her thumb upon my knee before she pulled back slowly and rose to make her way out of the carriage. Closing my eyes once more I just wanted to pause everything and freeze in the moment. Not wanting to raise any concern I force myself up and slowly leave the carriage...As if it was on instinct I looked to my mother in fear, her eyes held nothing but love and admiration as if she hugged me with her eyes. The warmmth that her look brought me I faced forward, fixed my posture once more, raised my chin, and took one last deep breath before making my way up the stone staircase to the entrance.