Chapter 46 She wouldn't leave
Celine’s POV
I stood in place, but she still held my hand, gently pulling me across with her.
“I didn't plan for this…” I said, my feet dragging against the floor.
“I know, but this is the ideal moment for us to leave. No guards watching us like hawks… come on, let’s go.”
“No… I didn't plan for this. So this… this was your plan all along? Asking me to come out so we escape?”
“I had to do something.”
I loosened her grip on me, taking a step back. “You planned this without telling me…”
“I didn't have a choice…”
“But I told you I'd made my choice.”
“That was no choice.”
My eyes were on her, and I wanted to believe she hadn't said that. What happened to her claiming she would accept whatever I chose?
She’d acted it out. I had doubted she was sincere, but I let that doubt go.
“What's all this for?”
She touched my hands, and I yanked her off.
“Because I care for you,” she said.
“This isn't about caring for me anymore.”
Her eyes were wet. It didn't make sense. Her life wasn’t tied to mine—at least I didn’t know if it was—but it was frightening to see someone go this far to pull me into their own path.
“Celine… please come with me.”
“No… I made my choice.”
“The choice you made was influenced by fear.”
I didn't know whether to believe that. But I should have known my fear didn't go that far. The fear I thought I had of Tristan could only be superficial—a feeling I assumed I was supposed to have—but if I checked myself, it didn't exist.
I couldn't be drawn to someone I feared.
I couldn't ask someone I feared to leave a room he owned when he could act however he wanted.
It didn't make sense that I’d get intimate with someone I feared.
“None of my actions were influenced by fear,” I told her. “Tristan never forced himself on me.”
“You wouldn't understand that.”
“What is there to understand?”
“Tristan always has his ways of manipulation. I know him more than you do.”
She grabbed my wrist again. We weren’t moving, just standing there, but my eyes were starting to go to our hands.
“Tell me what you know about him,” I said, looking around.
Hopefully she would stop this. Or maybe the arrival of the guards or gammas would make her stop.
It didn't seem like she would, even if they showed up. She could always create another lie perfect for the moment.
“Not now… I’ll explain in detail to you.”
“I have nowhere else to go.”
“You do,” she said, a small smile appearing despite her wet eyes. “You have other relatives… You will meet them… You will be with fellow humans.”
“I don't know them.”
“You will when you meet them, and everything will be perfect.” Now she was holding both my hands with a gentle but tight grip.
“I’m tired of moving around. I can't step into uncertainty.”
“Of course not… they’ve been looking for you.” Her eyes were showing both a smile and a cry. “I can vouch for them.”
“You can?”
“Yes!”
Wasn't that enough reason to go with her?
I’d be free from crazy werewolves. I wouldn’t have to be scared—not as much. Everything would be perfect, wouldn’t it?
Lila wouldn’t lie about that, would she?
I believed her, but I didn’t want to accept that everything she’d said could be true. And even if she tried harder to convince me, there were bells ringing in my head telling me not to leave this pack.
Lila wouldn’t be happy if I stayed.
The subtle connection I felt with Tristan would be cut off.
“Celine… we should leave before the guards come.”
I shook my head. “I need time.”
“Time—”
At that moment, guards came from behind us, and everyone nearby made way. Lila still held me tightly.
“Everyone should go indoors!” one of the guards shouted.
The guard approached us.
“We should leave,” Lila said.
“I don't want to.”
The guard stopped in front of us. “Lila?”
“We came out for a stroll,” she said.
We walked back to the palace in silence.
\---
She’d let me be, going into her room instead of staying longer to continue her usual gestures as a caring figure—an aunt willing to risk everything for me.
I didn't mind that.
But why did I feel like I should have gone with her? Or apologized?
For what exactly?
For choosing my own path?
Hell no. I wouldn't do that.
But making my own decisions was scary and freeing at the same time. Freeing because it made me feel like a person with choices and not a slave. Scary because things could go wrong.
It was always a huge responsibility to make decisions.
I opened the door but still waited. Maybe she would come.
She might, but not now.
It was unusual that no gamma had come to guard the door since the hour Tristan left.
“Tristan?” I muttered.
He was far off, walking past with some gammas behind him. Then he turned. Our eyes met, but he didn’t stop. He didn’t wave. Well, he never had, but since things were starting to progress between us… maybe he should.
I shut the door and leaned against it.
He ignored me.
He didn’t use that word in our last moment together. The thought of that, along with this moment, started to make a difference.
What if him calling me his mate was all a joke?
I had to suppress the bad warmth building in my chest.
Knock… knock.
Lila?
She came this soon?
I didn't open it. It would only be another back-and-forth that led nowhere. But the knock didn’t stop.
“Celine, open up.”
Wait… another voice in my head.
A mindlink only Tristan could do?
I thought he’d gone without stopping.