Chapter 13 — Fated to be Happy?
Mathias:
Cassia’s words pierce my brain. I know I’ve been unfair to her with my indecisiveness. She’s right. I don’t have the right to get angry after I’ve made a choice not to be her mate. It’s just that my body refuses to listen. Moving forward, I grasp her elbow. “I don’t know what to say, Cassia. You’re a sweet, beautiful woman. and I just… You have to understand that I only loved one woman. Then after years of mourning. I meet the one I’m fated to be with.”
Cassia frowns warily. “Then why don’t you let me go, Mathias. This is not working for us. I can’t keep doing this. It might be okay for you, but for me, it…” Her eyes glaze with tears that she refuses to let falls as she takes a step back. “…it’s not what I want.” Her voice quivers as she looks down at her hands. Jaw ticking, I reach for her hand again. This time she doesn’t pull back. “I know, Cassia. I’m not doing this to make things harder. This is not easy for me. I do care about you. I just can’t give you what you need.”
She hesitates for a moment, then nods her head. “It is easy for you, Mathias. No matter what you say, you gave up on me before you met me. I dreamt of you for five years. I saved myself for you. You are my first kiss. So don’t say that it’s not easy for you.” I move back, startled, feeling deep emotion run through my body at the sound of her words. Jaw tight, I look into her eyes, feeling myself getting lost, and it scares me because I want to take back what I said. I want to be her next kiss and be the first man to make love to her. I just can’t. Not when I still love Marael.
Sighing with weariness, I lick my lips and softly whisper. “Listen, Cassia, it’s late. How about we get some sleep.”
Cassia shakes her head but doesn’t argue. Instead, she turns around and takes a seat on the couch. “Good night.” She mumbles distractedly.
My fists tighten with regret as I take a reluctant step back to my room. It takes everything I have in me not to turn around and finish what I started with Cassia. As I lie in my bed, struggling with my arousal, I can’t help but think I made a mistake.