Chapter 7 Confused Emotions
We follow the hostess, weaving in and out of tables until we make it to the back and she seats us at a little table with a fake flower in the middle. It's cute... kinda. There are fairy lights hung up along the window to give some ambiance. I really don't care right now.
I slide into my seat and James takes the one across from me, and gives me a sweet smile. I take a deep breath and remember I love James and he is going to help me make things all better. I just need to get through this... fog of doubt. It will all be worth it. All the pain I've been through, the humiliation and abuse will all be a memory.
She hands us both our menus. "Your waiter will be out shortly," she chirps before returning to her spot. Neither of us respond as she retreats.
I look down at the menu I've pretty much memorized. I really don't have anything against Italian, but we have it every single time, and I'm bored of it... And it was my birthday. Why couldn't he just take me out to the Teriyaki place? I could've had my dinner for less than $10!
I'm not really in the mood for Italian, but I might as well get something. Maybe I'll just order a vegetarian pizza? I don't feel like having any of these meats tonight. Maybe I can take the rest back for Charlie? I have a feeling Beth is gonna take her temper out on my sister. I hate that so much!
"So, what happened?" James finally asks after we make our orders. He sits back and looks at my face and the bump that I really haven't had the time to clean up.
"I blew up at Beth. I was so sick of her stealing my money, then she orders me to make dinner for her whole damn family. I only do it so my sisters will eat! And Liv thinks the world owes her something and has no intention of trying to help us out. I was just so pissed off, I told Beth she could make dinner!" I growled, replaying the whole scene in my mind. And no, I still don't regret it.
Even if I hadn't let my anger get the best of me, she would've found some reason or other to hit me. It's her way of saying I'm beneath her and I owe her my loyalty. How the hell does she always get away with everything?
James nods in sympathy. "She could at least make dinner today. It is your birthday after all," he smiles. "Or maybe she could've ordered take out? Just to give you a day off?" he suggests.
"Its not just the day, James! All she does every damn day is sit around watching soap operas, waiting for me to come home so she can swipe my money!" I grit out in frustration. "She never does a damn lick of work, and expects me to clean up after her messes! I just am so damn tired of being used! And she knows she can get away with anything because if I say anything she will take it out on my sisters!"
James doesn't get it! He doesn't have anyone to take care of but himself! His parents only live 30 minutes away, and he can go see them all the time. If he ever runs out of money, he just goes and talks to his dad! But me? My parents died, and the money that was supposed to go to me is in the hands of my Evil Aunt!
"I know baby," he reaches across the table. "I really do. And as soon as I get the money, we'll get married. Just like I promised," he assures me.
This is our plan. I've been saving money for years. James has too. He promised me as soon as he has enough, we can move in with him and we'll get married.
He won't give me a ring to make it official. He says he doesn't want to deal with Aunt Beth. I guess that makes sense. But if I had a ring it would feel... real, at least. Right now, all I have is a promise that someday we will have the funds we need to get married. But is that really enough?