Chapter 24 — The Monsters

The monsters lurking in the dark have finally shown themselves in all their glory, rearing their horns and baring their fangs at whoever tried to taunt them. The memories that have awakened within me have brought forth these ugly horns out, intending to rear themselves at Cedric, who has arrived at the most perfect time. Taking one photo taped to the wooden panel of his closet, I waved it at him. His face visibly paled at the sight of it.

“Care to explain what this is, Cedric?” I purred, sporting a smirk as I walked up to him. “I never thought you cared for me in such a degree—to the point of stalking and printing photos you took. And here I thought you never loved me… You’re such a liar to this day.”

“W-what are you talking about, Reese?” He chuckled awkwardly, closing the distance between us to pull me with him in the direction of the door. I remained rooted on the ground as much as I can, refusing to budge as he gestured to the door with a sheepish grin. “You’re probably confused or having hallucinations. The doctor did say you were bound to have some since you knocked your head—”

Removing his grip on my wrist by flicking him off, I glared at him. If my injured hand weren’t broke, I would have slapped him on the face. “Spare me the theatrics, Cedric. My memories have returned. There’s no use pretending to be innocent after what you have done.” Hand on my hip, I stood on my ground and tapped my foot in impatience. “So, could you please get on with your reasons? I don’t have all day.”

For once I am finished with you, I will ruin your name and your company until my final breath.

Cedric finally dropped the act of feigning innocence, the grin he sported faltered slowly as he took in a deep breath. “Very well. Seems like you finally did recall.” Crossing his arms, he huffed in dismay, as if he was expecting this day to come. But not this early. “And here I thought we could’ve lived a new life free of ill emotions that conjured up in the past. Did you happen to recall all the malicious deeds you’ve committed in the past as well?”

“Free?” I laughed aloud at how preposterous it sounded. “How could we be free when we remember all of it? No one is truly free, Cedric—neither are you. Your attempts have been all for naught. And malicious?” Licking my lips, I grinned victoriously at his displeased expression. Any amount of discomfort or anger from Cedric, I gladly welcome with open arms. Anything just to spite him. “When did I ever do anything that can be considered a crime, my dear?”

He gritted his teeth, holding back his frustration. “You burned Francesca’s face with acid. That alone is already a crime!”

Tapping my chin, I raised an eyebrow at his words then snapped my fingers. “Ah! Now that makes sense as to why my father tried to compensate her with money. Explains the check I found inside the vault.” Giggling, I then patted my head. “Glad I remember now. Replaying the horrified screams and her crying is bound to invigorate me whenever I feel sad. Thank you for the reminder, my dear—”

“That’s not all, Reese.” He interjected, narrowing his eyes harshly as he pointed an accusing finger at me. “You threatened my parents, making them move out of town in fear. I shall never forget how you sent them death threats and a box full of snakes. My mother kept having nightmares due to your antics. Threatening the Richardsons and helping your parents with their evil schemes—I thought you were different from them. You made me believe you were different, making me fall in love with you when I knew I shouldn’t have. Yet, you threw away all your dignity to have everything you wanted to the brink of doing things that are deem insane.”

“I did that because I loved you, Cedric. Maybe if you loved me much more than I did and actually cared about me instead of bluntly admitting how you used me to your benefit, perhaps we wouldn’t be having this conversation right now!” Running out of breath, I inhaled sharply as I composed myself. “You broke my heart when I offered it up to you with no hesitation, hoping you’d take care of it since I trusted you… And yet, you were the first one who did. My heart, who has never loved any other man, got broken to pieces by the same man I loved first!” Chuckling at how ironic it was, I then stopped to snarl at him. “And when I lost my memories, you should have left me all alone. You could’ve walked away and let me live a life in peace, never having to see your stupid face ever again—instead, you stayed by my side and even posed as my boyfriend. You toyed with my heart again!”

Sighing deeply, Cedric palmed his face in exhaustion. “It was never my intention to hurt you… I did love you, Reese. I really did. But when I heard your parents have been involved in illegal activities, specifically selling information, I had to be careful. And my dream to take back the Grand Mari Hotel was my priority at that time.” Clenching his fists, he hissed. “Sick and dying, my grandparents had nothing to do but to sell it to those who wanted it. Of course, I wanted it back once I had the money because it belongs to my family…”

I rolled my eyes at the dramatic story he must have concocted up to appear as if he has no faults. And even if it were the truth, I didn’t care.

“And what? You had to kill me and my family because we bought it? Another obstacle in your goals?” Shaking my head, I narrowed my eyes at his pathetic excuses. “And you have the nerve to say I’m evil. Face it, Cedric. You’re just like me, maybe even worst! Just admit it to yourself. You’ve turned into the very thing you swore not to be—a monster.”

“No!” He shouted out in protest at my statement, denial in that handsome face I used to love. “I never wanted to kill you or your parents. It was an accident! I never… I never thought it would even work. By the time I found out they got into an accident because the breaks I tried to sabotage, I was filled with guilt and regret. I still love you back then even with all the things you’ve committed. Yet, I was pushed to the brink! I was going insane, Reese! It felt like I was going to drown in my thoughts if I didn’t do something. The thought of failing… so close to my goal… I was going back to square one.”

“And you had Hattie killed.” His horrified expression merely fueled my joy. “Don’t think I’m stupid, Cedric. You know her and when she approached me that day, you had your men shoot her. The gig is up, my dear. You murdered not only my family, but even Hattie who tried to help me escape your controlling clutches!”

Kneeling to the ground, he grabbed my uninjured hand, yanking me in the process. “She was in the way of our paradise, Reese! She was trying to shatter the perfect world I have built just for you! I did everything for you to live comfortably. If things went smoothly, I might have asked you to marry me this New Year’s Eve!” Cursing at his own misfortune, he sighed. “If only… We might’ve been happy, Reese. You and I… Maybe if you remained that way, oblivious and all innocent, we might have been a happy couple.”

Seeing him reach out again to take my hand, I flinched and moved away. Whenever he wanted to hold me or even my hand, it seemed as if millions of insects crawling up my spine and through my arms. Hairs raised and body wanting to make sure he kept a great distance. Through this, it will keep the quelling desire to embrace and kiss Cedric Dixon.

I am truly messed up.

“Marry you? Who’d marry a sinner like you?” A roar of laughter was what he received from me, holding my stomach at the absurd notion. “Perhaps I should jog your memory, too? November 10, Thursday night. At the gardens of the Grand Mari Hotel. If you think I’ve forgotten how you stood me up, humiliated me in front of high profiled people… How you merely stood there as I begged on my knees for you to stay, I’d be an idiot. I have pride, Cedric. Didn’t you once told me not to throw away my dignity?”

I will never forget again what happened that night.

“I had to, Reese.” Standing up, he brushed off his pants as he raised his chin as if he did a noble thing. The sight alone was comedic enough. “You’d have done the same thing if you were in my situation. Anyone would if they were proposed by you. If they knew everything you had done back then, perhaps you’d be in prison right now.”

Smirking, I shrugged at him nonchalantly. “True. I’d kill off your family along with your pitiful self after embarrassing you in front of hundreds. Don’t exclude yourself, too! Both of us will wind up in jail if word ever got out.”

Cedric shook his head, chuckling to himself humorlessly. Anyone will say or deemed he has lost his mind. “Francesca has killed herself, Reese. Anyone whom you’ve done wrongly are either powerless or has given up.”

The news of Francesca’s death didn’t impact me in any way. More likely due to how I have lost the emotional attachment I had with her all those years ago when she drifted away. Our friendship had been doomed from the start. With such elite parents, she was destined to hang around other kids and individuals who were like her. Even as my family rose to the ranks, she grew vain and snobbish. She even pretended not to know me multiple times.

Which reminds me…

“The Richardsons… you deliberately sought them out that day, didn’t you? To humiliate me at the restaurant.” Glancing at him, the never-ending mistakes he has committed continued to amaze me. “You know something, Cedric? You’re a hypocrite. I didn’t know why I was too crazy about you back then… What did I ever see in you to do all those immoral actions? I regret not listening to my father when it came to you. They would still be alive if I did.” Walking past him, I bitterly laughed. “You indeed have a pretty face, enough to seduce anyone to do your bidding. But not anymore, Cedric. I’m done with you—done with being your puppet.”

“No, you’re not.” At his claim, I faced him with an equally concerned look. What was going on through his mind? Cedric appeared to be serious, gazing into my eyes as he placed a hand over his heart. “I know deep down you still have feelings for me. Even without your memories, you continued to seek me out.”

Disgusted at his words, I made a face. “Have you lost your marbles? There is no way I’d still love you. You murdered my parents, Hattie—made my life a living hell that I have become one of the demons children are told not to listen! You made me this way, Cedric. And I’m going to end this, once and for all.” Back turned to him, I was close to escaping when he yanked me back to his side, pushing me to the mattress of his bed as I struggled to get loose from his grip.

Cedric was indeed strong, overpowering my every kick and punch I aimed at him. With a literal handicap, there was no choice but to surrender as his hand took my injured hand and pressed hard. Tears glistened my sight as I screamed which was instantly muffled by his kiss.

“L-let me go! You monster—”

“Yes! Just like you.” He hissed, diving down to kiss me again. Biting his tongue, he pulled back in pain We were made for each other, Reese. And I’d run through hell to be with you over and over again.” Pinning me to the bed with his full strength, he dared to kiss me silly even with his bleeding tongue.

It should have disgusted me. The man who killed Hattie, my parents—took everything I loved and cherish for his selfish grains. Yet, even as he tainted my lips with his messed-up love, I took it in. I couldn’t push him away and the tiniest voice in my head not to. Despite it all, I probably do still love him. No matter how hard I tried, memories or not, Cedric Dixon was all my heart sang for. My traitorous heart, failing me to choose the right option and run away.

Even without that voice, I still chose the decision it could have made… Or perhaps, that voice was the real me all along. Hiding and waiting for the exact moment to come out.

“You’re a monster.” I whispered; cheeks stained with tears as he removed my clothes. His tie flying and meeting the rest of his clothes and mine on the floor. The photos of me fluttered into the wind as I sang a melodic tune once he touched me down there. My undoing planned and final as he took everything from me—heart and soul. All I could do was take and take, always on the receiving end as Cedric thrusted into me with the intent of proving his undying love. My words drowned out with his fervent kisses and moans as his body grinded into mine.

Maybe if he and I were normal humans, this love story of ours would have ended up the same way as the others. First meeting like a scene out of a fairytale, first dates and kisses. Swearing to love one another until we die. Then, marrying and starting a family. Things normal couples do with the lifetime given to them. All these maybes had a chance to come true, but he and I wasted it. May not even be destined to take on that path.

Every heated gaze, fueled by passion or rage, Cedric and I moved like animals on heat. Sex filled with hate and love at the same time. Any nasty word might come up to describe such a scene and experience, yet it was still magical in its own fucked up way. Years of pent up frustration, anger, lust and wildness all pouring out in this one moment. At this vulnerable position, I was close to saying I was lucky—both of us were lucky. Lucky enough to cross the stars and meeting with one another, souls fated to share and meet in one lifetime. But at the wrong time and space.

And in this miserable world, we were both monsters under our beds—ready to kill and feed on whatever nightmares we made or endured.

“I hate you, Cedric. I wish you will die.”

Biting back a moan, Cedric lifted his head that has been tucked in the corner of my neck. Painting red and blue on the skin there to stake his claim on what has always been his and never was.

“I hate you, too, Reese. So much.”