Chapter 18 18
Venessa’s POV
“I lie in bed every night wishing it was you beside me,” he said quietly. “When I’m with her, it’s you I think about. I’m trying truly to restrain myself, to ignore what I want and what I need, but it’s getting harder. It’s like you have some kind of power over me, Venessa. When you’re near, time stops. Nothing else matters. Sometimes it feels like I’ve known you before like we’ve crossed paths in another life. You understand me. You see me. You always know exactly what to say, what to do. No one has ever understood me the way you do. I thought it was just the bond, but it’s more than that. It’s you. You’re meant for me.”
His words struck straight through my chest. He knew me truly knew me better than anyone ever had. I’d never been able to hide anything from him. He saw through my plans, my careful maneuvering, my quiet schemes, yet he never exposed me or humiliated me for them. What we felt for each other went far beyond the mate bond. I knew that. But my mission didn’t allow space for love. I was living on borrowed time, racing against a year that was already slipping away. Falling in love wasn’t part of the plan.
I didn’t even know what would happen to me if I succeeded. What if the life I’d been given was taken back? The thought of leaving him shattered because of me was unbearable.
“But we can’t be together, Alpha,” I said softly. “That’s why I want to leave after a year of serving you.”
He tightened his grip on my hands.
“Give me time, Venessa. Jalisa doesn’t love me. She’s with me because her father wants her to be. Please just give me time to fix this.”
“Why?” I asked.
He exhaled and bowed his head before lifting it again. Denzel was devastatingly handsome his profile just as striking as his face. Dark hair, sharp jaw, a pronounced chin, and those grey eyes that sometimes deepened into something darker, something wilder. I’d always thought that darkness belonged to his wolf. He looked like a god one who was supposed to be mine. Fate, however, had ruined that.
“Because Rayon plans to ask you to marry him tomorrow,” he said quietly. “That’s why I came looking for you.”
Shock rooted me to the spot. Rayon? Marriage? The same carefree, flirtatious Rayon?
Before I could even process it, Nyla’s voice cut in sharply.
“This is what happens when you change the course of events, Venessa. Rayon wasn’t meant to live, but you saved him. Now we pay the price with a love triangle. Happy?”
I was speechless.
“I know you want to move on,” Denzel continued. “I know you want to be free of our bond. But please, Venessa, hold on for us. We rejected each other, yet the bond remains. That’s the goddess telling us something. We’re meant to be together. Please… I need you to break his heart. Say no.”
I stared at him, stunned.
“He bought a ring,” he added. “He’s taking you out tomorrow to propose. I know this is too much to ask, but I need this from you. For our hearts. For our wolves.” His eyes misted. “Please, Venessa.”
I needed to say something anything to ease the pain in his expression.
“I’m not ready to settle down,” I said carefully. “I’m only twenty, Alpha.”
Relief lit his face. He smiled and helped me to my feet.
“Come,” he said gently. “Let our wolves meet.”
Nyla nearly vibrated with excitement. I hesitated, remembering my mother’s warning, but I doubted Denzel would harm me even if he noticed something strange about my wolf.
“My wolf’s name is Nigel,” he said, already smiling as he began to undress.
I quickly looked away. He was too beautiful too tempting. Every muscle moved with lethal grace, his tattoos bold and commanding. I wanted to touch him, desperately, but I didn’t dare.
“It’s our turn, Venessa,” Nyla urged.
I couldn’t believe her enthusiasm, knowing we only had a year knowing we had no idea what would happen when that year ended. I doubted fate would let us live on afterward. Slowly, I undressed, folded my clothes, and braced myself. The shift came gradually.
When it was done, Nigel let out a powerful howl.
I stared at my fur in disbelief. Snow white.
This was wrong.
My wolf had always been large and grey. I ran toward the lake, Nigel racing after me. When I looked at my reflection, my breath caught. I looked like a full werewolf now. I’d been a half-breed before but not anymore. My wolf was smaller, delicate, entirely white. Nyla and I were stunned. I felt weaker too, not nearly as powerful as I’d once been.
Was this some cruel joke? Why bring me back only to weaken me?
Nigel nuzzled Nyla, and she responded shyly, introducing herself.
“Your wolf is beautiful, Venessa,” Denzel said, nuzzling me.
I returned the gesture.
“Nice to meet you, Nyla,” he added, and she purred.
We ran together, played together him chasing me through the forest. For those moments, I forgot everything: the mission, the ticking clock, the fear. We were carefree, wild, alive. When darkness fell, we returned to our clothes and shifted back.
“Nyla is beautiful,” Denzel said as he dressed.
“Alpha Nigel is a handsome, domineering wolf,” I replied, making him laugh.
“Call us by our names when we’re alone,” he said softly as he stepped closer.
He inhaled my scent, then pressed a kiss to the sensitive spot beneath my ear. I froze, unsure of what he’d do next. His lips traveled slowly from my neck to my mouth and he kissed me.
I melted.
I rose onto my toes, threading my fingers into his hair. Kissing him felt like quenching a thirst I’d endured for far too long. He lifted me effortlessly, my legs wrapping around his waist as our mouths stayed locked. He laid me down on the forest floor, kissing his way down my neck, opening my blouse.
When his mouth closed over my breast, a moan escaped me. I couldn’t believe this was happening.
“Please,” he whispered against my skin, “don’t say yes to Rayon. I’m begging you.”
His hands and lips made it hard to think, but I forced myself to gather what little strength I had left. I pushed gently at his chest and slipped out from beneath him. Clutching my blouse closed, I stood there, breathless.
His eyes were dark just like Nigel’s. He was barely holding on.
“I’m sorry,” he said hoarsely. “I’m sorry. I lost control.”
I nodded, buttoning my blouse.
“Please… give me time,” he said.
I nodded again. I didn’t have the time he was asking for, but I couldn’t explain that to him. I left the forest first, returned to my room, and shut the door behind me. Sliding down until my back hit the wood, I sat on the floor and cried.
Why hadn’t this happened the first time? Why hadn’t fate been kind to us then?
Everything felt right except the timing. Now my wolf was changed, weakened, and a year suddenly felt impossibly short. I couldn’t bear the thought of hurting Denzel. Not knowing what would happen after that year, I knew the only mercy I could give him was distance.
Even if it broke me to do it.