Chapter 13 Chapter 13
ALINA
I felt more numb than I ever have. It hurt when Kai rejected me, but I was able to move on past it because I did not trust him to not hurt me. I didn't even know him well then. But I knew Xavier. I did like him, and I believed he liked me too. It was the closest I had come to anyone trying to get to know me and fall in love with me, and now he had betrayed me. Maybe I was as unlovable as everyone thought I was. No one could ever see me for me and fall in love with that.
"Alina!" Kai's voice called out through the trees. I closed my eyes, hissing when I remembered that he had seen me when I left the cabin in tears. I did not want to talk to anyone. I needed to get as far away from anyone as I could. I heard his voice again, and I ignored him. I got up to my feet and started to run, my feet pounding against the ground as I ran deeper into the woods. I heard his footsteps behind me, faster and getting closer to me.
"Alina, stop!" he called out, his voice closer now, filled with concern.
I didn't stop. I couldn't. I didn't want him to see me like this. I just wanted to disappear, to let the forest swallow me whole. But his footsteps grew louder, his presence drawing nearer, and I knew he wouldn't give up. My legs finally gave out once again after exhaustion filled me, and I collapsed against a tree, my breath coming in ragged gasps.
The tears flowed uncontrollably now, sobs tearing through me. I buried my face in my hands, trying to muffle the sound, but it was no use. The pain was too much. I felt like I was falling apart, piece by piece.
Kai reached me not long after and he crouched to the ground in front of me, "Alina, what happened?" he asked, he raised a hand to touch me, but he quickly retracted as though he was afraid to touch me. "Please, talk to me."
I shook my head violently, unable to speak, my body trembling with the force of my sobs. I didn't want to look at him, didn't want to see the pity in his eyes. I didn't want to feel anything at all. Once he had been the one who had caused me to feel this way. Him seeing me like this was like another slap to my face.
"Alina, please. What happened? Was it Xavier?" His voice was strained and concerned. The mention of Xavier's name sent a fresh wave of pain crashing over me, and I clenched my fists, my nails digging into my palms. I nodded, my throat too tight to form words. I wondered if he even cared about me at all. But I needed comfort. Him seated here beside me gave me more peace than I expected to be at.
Kai moved closer to me, and I raised my head up to glare at him. His eyebrow shot up before he leaned away from me and sighed, "What did he do?"
I took a shaky breath, as I looked ahead into the woods. It felt surreal. I couldn't believe that I was about to utter these words to anyone ever. I thought I had really found my person only to be hit with the biggest reality check, "He was with Nicki, my friend from the pack," I managed to choke out. "In bed. Together."
Kai's expression shifted, a mix of shock and anger crossing his face, "He cheated on you? With your friend?
I nodded, the tears spilling over again. "I'm such an idiot," I whispered, my voice breaking. "I trusted him. I thought he was different."
Kai shook his head. "You're not an idiot, Alina. He's the one who betrayed you, not the other way around."
I looked up at him, my vision blurry from tears. "But you were right. You warned me, I should never have come back. You must be thinking, 'I told you so."" I murmured. I did not have any reason to not doubt what he had told me back in the Seven Isles. He had betrayed me once so of course I was going to think he was a liar when he told me that.
He frowned, shaking his head. "No, I'm not thinking that at all," he replied softly. "I would never say that to you. I'm not here to gloat, Alina. I'm here because I care about you and want to find out what happened to you."
I let out a bitter laugh, the sound harsh in the quiet of the woods. "Why?" I asked, my voice barely a whisper. "Why do you care?"
Kai hesitated for a moment, before he spoke. "Because I know what it feels like to make mistakes, to hurt the people you care about. And I've hurt you enough already. I don't want to add to that."
I stared at him, his words sinking in, "Right." I muttered. I knew he wanted something. I was not special enough for him to just wake up one day and decide that he wanted me back. He went through all of this stress to bring me back with him, and I could bet on everything that he had ulterior motives.
"Where are you going to go now?" He asked.
"I do not know." I shook my head. It was still afternoon but night was going to come soon enough, especially because of my situation. I was going to be left out in the dark and then the creatures of the night, in the woods would come for me. I was heartbroken, but I did not want to die tonight. I needed to find someplace to go.
"Come back with me to the Seven Isles." He offered. I turned to look at him sharply and his throat bobbed, like he was afraid of saying that but he said it anyway.
"No." I shook my head.
"Why?" He raised a brow. "I am not going to force you to stay back or anything. You can just stay there in the meantime until you figure out what you want to do or where you want to go. I won't push you, I promise."
I wiped at my eyes, feeling the sting of tears still lingering. "I don't want to stay with you, Kai." If he did not understand what I meant, then he was not the person he was posing to be here. I swallowed bitterly as I took another glance into the woods. How was I going to stay here and fend for myself?
He nodded slowly, his expression understanding. "I know," he said quietly. "But I cannot leave you here. There are dangerous creatures in the woods that could hurt you. These woods are home to a lot of rebel packs like the one we just left. There are also rogues that act on their own without any consequences, so they are brutal and wicked. Please come with me." He begged.
I remembered being told that I was lucky when I first came to Xavier's pack because women did not make it that long in the woods without getting killed or raped. Maybe I should follow him back. There was nowhere else I could go to.
"Okay," I whispered finally, my voice barely holding steady. "Just for a few nights. But don't think this changes anything."
A flicker of relief crossed Kai's face, and he nodded. "Of course," he agreed, his voice soft. "You can decide whenever you want to leave."
I took a deep breath, trying to steady my shaking hands. "Alright." I said.
He stood up and offered his hand to me. I hesitated but took it, letting him pull me to my feet. His grip was firm and steady, and for a moment, I felt a flicker of something in my body. I quickly pushed away. I wouldn't let myself feel anything for him. Not after everything that happened. We walked back through the woods, the silence heavy between us. I kept my eyes fixed on the ground, my thoughts still spinning. When we reached the car, Kai opened the door for me and I got in.
I looked behind as the driver revved the engine to life and zoomed off. The pack I had spent three months of my life in. All of the bonds I created with the people there, and Xavier. It was time to leave it all behind. I closed my eyes as my chest tightened once again, and I felt the rush of tears come to me. I couldn't stop them even if I wanted to, so I looked down at the window as we drove back to the Seven Isles.