"We'll see if he listens," Susan says, turning the page, taking the image of Will Jenner away with it. "But Carter isn't quick to forgive when someone wrongs him."
The revelation shakes the ground beneath me. The truth, at last. And it's not at all what I wanted and miles from what I expected.
Carter returns to the apartment like a conquering hero, water pressure sorted. The super told me he'll fix it within the hour. No problem is too small or too large for him to solve, it seems. Had he charmed the super too? Used that wide, crooked smile, his powers of persuasion, or promises of money or bribes? I'd seen him do it before. I'd watched his father use it in a different way.
I can't stop seeing the two of them. The similarities.
When we leave Susan's, the unease has settled into a pit of despair in my stomach. I can't keep this a secret. I have to talk about it, but I have no idea what to say or where to start.
Carter takes my hand in his. He lifts it to his lips and presses a kiss to the back. "Thank you for coming with me."
"My pleasure," I say.
"Remember our first non-date? The pizza place across the street?"
"Yes. After my date stood me up."
"Worst mistake of his life, but I'm eternally grateful," Carter says. "Let's get pizza again. Eat it on your fire escape. Who knows how long you'll have the place?"
My chest feels tight, and breathing is difficult. Thinking is difficult. I shake my head slowly. "I can't. Carter…"
"Oh my God. I don't know where to start. I…"
Troubled, golden eyes meet mine. There's concern in them. "No pizza," he says firmly. "Come, let's go to yours. Do you feel faint?"
"Yes," I say, but not in the way he means. Will C. Jenner, I think. I love the son of the man who took everything from my family.
Carter keeps a hand on my back, and he's the one who unlocks the door to Old Man Pierce's house. The familiar smell of mildew and mold hits us. We walk the creaky steps in silence. The words feel heavy on my tongue. I don't know how he'll react. Will it make him hate his father even more? Feel… shame, anger, hurt? It's not his favorite topic.
It's never been mine either.
"Honey, what's wrong?" Carter says. He closes the door to my room behind us. He's never called me honey before. It's always been kid or spitfire or sometimes Audrey, and to my surprise, the endearment make my eyes tear up.
There's alarm in his eyes now. "Did something happen?"
"Yes. I don't know how to tell you this."
"You can tell me anything. Don't cry, kid. Please. Come here." He locks his arms around me and I bury my face in his chest. "Tell me," he says softly.
My words come out muffled. "Your mother showed me old pictures of you when you were a kid."
His arms tense around me. "The old photo albums?"
"Yes. And I saw… I saw…" My breath is spiralling out of control.
"Shit," he says quietly, troubled eyes meeting mine. "Tell me what you saw."
But it's there in his eyes. The suspicion. The knowledge. "You already know?"
"Tell me what you saw," he repeats.
I shake my head and step back. "You know. Don't you? I saw a picture of your father."
Carter's eyes drift closed, like he can't look at me. There's pain on his face. "Fuck," he mutters.
"He's Will C. Jenner. The man who swindled my father, who sat at our dinner table, who joked with my brother and asked me about my college plans. Who made my dad feel two inches tall after he left with all the money he'd charmed his way into." I feel like sobbing, and I feel like screaming. "Why aren't you surprised? Did you know?"
"Yes. Audrey, I never-"
"How long?"
He looks pained. "Don't focus on that."
"How long did you know he was the same man? The man I've been looking for for years?"
"About a month," he says.
The admission goes off like a bomb in my head. A month. A month. He'd known, when I'd pitched him my con-artist investigative piece. He'd known, and he'd taken me out to dinner, and laughed at my jokes, and made love to me all the same.
He hadn't trusted me with the truth.
I back away until I hit the wall, feeling like I can't breathe. Good thing there's solid plaster behind me, or I wouldn't be upright.
Carter steps closer, and all I can make out are the sudden similarities. The heavy brows. The wide, charming mouth. The thick hair.
"Were you ever going to tell me?" I ask.
He falters, and in the pause, I hear the reply loud enough to rattle my bones. No. "I was planning to," he says.
"No," I whisper. "You weren't. Not really. Can't you at least admit that?"
"Audrey," he says, and there's heartbreak in his eyes. Like I'm the one hurting him.
"Oh my God. I can't believe you wouldn't tell me the second you found out."
His voice strengthens. Snaps into business-mode, solution-mode. "How much did my father swindle off yours?"
"How much? I'll pay it all back. Every last cent."
I stare at him. "This isn't something you can fix with money. Especially not your money," I say. If there's one person who shouldn't pay for Will C. Jenner's mistakes, it's his son.
But Carter steps back like I've insulted him. "Audrey," he says, voice hoarse. "I can't have my father's dealings ruin this. Ruin us."
I close my eyes. I don't want that either, but right now, the only thing I can think is that he wasn't going to tell me. He was planning on going his whole life knowing, and not telling me.
"I want you to leave," I whisper. "Please, Carter. I need to be alone."
He doesn't say another word. He just closes the door softly on the way out, footsteps disappearing down the steps beyond, and I sink slowly to the floor.