Chapter 54 Chapter Fifty-Four
The truth is I don't know if she will ever be able to control her gifts. I don't know how to help her with them, I don't know anyone that can help her understand them. I don't understand them, but I wish I did.
I wish I could help her more. I wish I could make this easier for her. I don't even know if I am doing the right thing to help her. I am just going to keep trying, keep trying to help her. We will figure out how to do this together. Even if the only thing I can do for her is show her my support.
I stand up, pulling her to her feet. She groans, frustrated. "It's no use. I have tried everything. I tried focusing on the feelings I had before I changed. I tried forcing myself to change. I tried screaming in frustration. Nothing is working." She rambles, huffing loudly.
I chuckle. "Baby it's okay. I am here baby. Okay. Let's try together. We know for sure anger is a trigger, and fear is a trigger. Everytime you have changed it was in the moment, due to anger, pain or fear. So, maybe let's try thinking of something that pisses you off and see if that works. How does that sound?"
She nods her head slowly. "Okay, I guess we can try that."
"Okay babygirl. What is something that makes you really mad? Like super mad?" I ask, rubbing my fingers across her cheek.
She shakes her head and whispers. "I don't want to think about that."
I furrow my brows. "Why not Angel? What is it?" I ask, racking my brain trying to think of what it could possibly be. It's got to be pretty bad if she doesn't even want to tell me what it is. Leilani is usually a pretty happy person. She rarely gets mad and when she does, it usually doesn't last for very long.
Leilani looks away from me, shaking her head no. I put my finger under her chin and tilt her head up so she is facing me. "Tell me babygirl."
"But it hurts to much to think about." She whispers and a tear slides down her cheek. Her eyes are filled with so much pain, just thinking about whatever it is.
There is only one thing I know of that can piss her off and hurt her all at the same time. One thing I don't even like to think about. The one woman I never want to think about again. Amara. That is the one downfall to not telling Tiberius about me and his daughter being mates.
If we had told him, he wouldn't have been forcing Amara on me. I almost lost Leilani because of her, I never want to hear from her or talk to her ever again. I hate that she hurt Leilani.
"It's Amara isn't it?" I ask, running my finger across Leilani's cheek, catching the falling tear.
Leilani nods her head and another tear streams down her face. "Listen to me baby. I swear you don't have to worry about her. She is the furthest thing from my mind, and she will never come anywhere near me or you ever again. I swear baby. Okay?"
"You promise?" She asks, voice breaking a little.
"I promise baby. You are my entire world. I will never let anyone hurt you."
She nods her head again. "Thank you Malakai."
I lean forward and kiss her forehead. "Take all that pain and turn it into anger okay baby? Don't let it hurt you anymore. Let the anger fill you up, channel it towards changing baby." I whisper, when I pull away from her.
Leilani nods her head again. "I will try. I will try to change it all into anger."
"You can do it baby." I take a step away from her and she takes a deep breath, closing her eyes.
A minute or so later she opens her eyes. "Say her name again." She whispers.
"What baby?" I ask, not sure if I heard her right.
"Say her name again." She repeats and I hesitate for a second. If it helps her, I guess I will give it a shot.
I take a deep breath. "Amara." I say the name, and it feels wrong. Saying any woman's name besides Leilani's feels wrong. She is the only woman I ever think about, I don't want to think about any other woman.
Leilani growls, bringing my attention back to her. Her eyes have changed and she is breathing heavily, anger radiating off of her in waves. "I think it worked." Leilani says half growling.
"It did babygirl."
She did it, she triggered it on her own. Now let's see if she can revert back to normal. Hurting me has been one of the main ways she changes back when we were combat training. She needs to be able to change back without hurting me.
"Change back for me baby." I coax, running my hand up her arm.
Leilani growls. "I can't. I am to pissed off. I don't know how to change back."
"Just take a deep breath. Think about me baby. Think about me and you and how happy we are baby. Think of all the fun things we have done together babygirl." I whisper, hoping it will work. I don't know if it will, but I hope it does.
Leilani takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. She does this a few times, closing her eyes. A couple of minutes later when she opens them, they have returned to normal.
I pull her into a tight hug. She did it. She really did it. "You did it babygirl. You did it."
"I did?" She asks, sounding surprised.
"Yes you did!" I say feeling excited for her and so, so proud.
Leilani wraps her arms around me, squeezing me tightly. "I can't believe it. Thank you Malakai."
"You are the one that did it baby. Why are you thanking me?" I ask, chuckling.