Chapter 47

"Lil?"

I looked in the direction of the voice, as if by doing so I could see if it really belonged to who I was thinking of. Carefully not to slip, I got up from the floor, quickly rinsed myself to get rid of the foam and left the bathroom, with one towel wrapped around my body and the other in my hair.

I walked to the door, and the voice spoke again, as if to confirm my doubts:

"Lil? Is everything okay with you?"

I swallowed hard, wondering if she would notice my strange manner and if some stupid excuse would convince her, the way she knew me well. I ignored my questions and unlocked the door, opening it to find Anne standing there.

"What are you doing here?" I murmured, but my voice came out croaky and hoarse, totally at odds with my attempt at a casual smile.

"Your mother called the house, said you were acting strange, and I decided to come over and investigate," she replied, her brow furrowing slightly in concern.

"Nonsense, there's nothing wrong with me," I lied, feeling my knees wobble again, but I stood my ground. Anne came into the room, and when I mentioned to close the door behind us, she held my wrist with a puzzled expression.

"What exactly is that?" she asked, in a way that bordered on horror, and I looked in the direction she was facing. Jagged, reddish streaks colored my arms from my shoulders to my wrists. And even then I couldn't feel clean.

"I... I don't know," I stammered, pulling away from her politely and closing the door, "I think it's... Allergy from something."

"When are you going to realize that your lies don't convince me?", Anne said, her voice low, brimming with seriousness through her eyes "It's not okay with you, of course not. What happened?"

"Nothing happened!", I exclaimed, a little louder than I intended, because my voice came out squeaky and shaky. Hiding something from her was not easy, much less something like that, which even I didn't know how to hide from myself, although I tried with all my might.

"Lil, for God's sake," she called out, slightly in shock at my reaction, as I walked briskly towards my closet "You know you can trust me, you don't have to lie!"

I hid as much as I could behind my closet doors, not letting her see my face, and sighed, annoyed. She shouldn't be there, I needed some time alone to think before I talked to anyone. But now that she was already there, I couldn't kick her out without creating suspicion. She followed me, and sat on the bed behind me, while I gathered the strength to speak.

"I told you, I'm fine, this must be some kind of allergy," I mumbled, not having the courage to look at her. Nor to continue talking. What else could I say?

I heard Anne snorting behind me as I picked up some clothes, and I was starting to get really stressed out when she made my situation worse:

"There's no point in continuing to lie, I'm not leaving here until you tell me how those scratches got there."

I swallowed, knowing that she was very serious because of her tone of voice. I closed my closet, with my underwear, a blouse, and shorts in my hand, and turned to her, defeated. As I knew would happen, the concern in her gaze sent a wave of insecurity down my spine, and before I could stop myself the words had been spoken.

"I did it."

"You? But why?" she murmured, with an even more horrified tone, and I felt my throat close up completely. Now that I was facing her, saying what had happened seemed impossible, but at the same time, lying was out of the question.

She could read my expression, feel the nervousness in my voice, no matter how convincing my lie was.

I didn't say anything for a few seconds, and the steadiness of my gaze on hers didn't last long. Needing an alibi not to stare at her, I pretended to concentrate on getting dressed, almost falling over with nervousness as I slipped my legs through the holes in my shorts.

"If you don't want to tell me, fine," she sighed as I finished putting on my blouse, and even without looking at her, I could feel her eyes fixed on the now pink welts on my legs, "But at least tell me how I can help you. Anything."

"No one can help me," I sighed, walking to the bathroom to comb my hair, and she followed, watching me look away from hers through the reflection of the mirror.

We were again in a tense silence, until my occupations ended and I turned to her, crossing my arms tightly at chest height. Anne stared at me with pleading looks in her eyes, and I realized that there was no point in stalling any longer. There was no escaping her own conscience, which in my case was Anne Mendes. I took a deep breath before doing what I had to do at one time or another, and my voice escaped my lips as an almost inaudible whisper.

"I... I cheated on Steve."

Anne's eyes widened, totally taken aback, and I waited until the shock of my revelation had worn off and she was able to speak. I stared firmly at the floor, trying in vain to stop shaking.

"C-with who?" she stammered, a few seconds later, and I could feel a twinge of suspicion in her manner of asking.

I closed my eyes tightly, commanding my body not to shiver at the thought of him, but it was in vain. When the words came out of my mouth, even lower than last time, I could feel the hair on the back of my neck stand up immediately.

"With Professor Cassano."

Anne didn't move. I couldn't return her gaze, and for some time we remained still and silent, each one too busy with her own thoughts.

"I... I don't know what to say," she whispered, seeming to finally win her struggle with words, and though I couldn't see her, I could tell she let out a surprised chuckle "Maybe I should start with an 'I knew it'."

I frowned and raised my face to look at her, not understanding. She stared back at me, her eyes wide with wonder, and smiling in a dazzled way. I rolled my eyes at her, totally confused, and didn't even have to say anything to get her to continue:

"Since the beginning, since you and Professor Suan started this whole thing, and Cassano decided to get involved... I always knew this was going to happen. Come on, Lillie, you always get the wrong guy.

I swear I tried to open my mouth to say something, but my voice wouldn't come out. My indignation was greater than anything. What do you mean, I was always into the wrong guy? I wasn't into Cassano! That was just a slip, an unwanted impulse!