CHAPTER 139

CHAPTER 139
POV ELIZABETH

I waited the excruciating five minutes, eyes closed and whispering prayers, begging God for a negative result. Finally, I opened my eyes—and the first test came out invalid. But the other two… they were the reason for my despair, because there it was: the dreaded positive.

I sat down on the toilet and started crying, my hand on my head.
“I can’t be pregnant. Not now! Please, God!” I murmured to myself through the tears.

Afraid Matthew might come upstairs, I flushed the urine, wrapped the tests in toilet paper, and threw them in the trash. Then I unlocked the bathroom door and went to take a shower.

Under the water, my mind kept racing: What am I going to do now?
How do I tell the man who had a vasectomy that I’m pregnant?
Oh, God!

Lost in my thoughts, I suddenly felt Matthew’s hands wrap around my waist as he hugged me from behind.

“Why didn’t you invite me to shower with you?” Matthew asked sweetly, planting kisses on my neck.

“You were so caught up with Elena,” I turned to him and wrapped my arms around his neck, “I didn’t want to interrupt you two. And I really needed a shower, so I figured I’d go ahead.” I said, trying to hide how nervous I was.

“What’s wrong, babe? You seem tense. Is something going on?” he asked gently, his lips brushing mine before we kissed.

Matthew knows me too well—he can always tell when something’s off.

“It’s nothing, love... I think it’s just all the surprises from my first day at work that got to me.” I forced a smile and kissed his chin.
“Babe, I think I’ll be home a little later tomorrow. Is that okay?” I asked, looking into his eyes.

“No, of course not!” he said, turning off the shower. “But did something happen? Was there a problem?” he asked, concerned.

How am I supposed to tell him the truth? Oh God, help me!

“It’s just that I forgot a few things at the clinic and need to go pick them up. But it’ll be quick, I promise I won’t take long.” I said, forcing a smile and kissing him before he could flood me with more questions.

As we kissed, I could feel his body responding, his hardness pressing against my stomach... and for a moment, all the worries that had been tormenting me simply vanished. My hands began to explore him, and we gave in to the moment.

We started with gentle touches, then made love under the warm water. It was passionate, intense, and in that moment, I forgot all my problems.
We stayed like that for a while, holding each other in silence, catching our breath. Then we finished our shower and went downstairs for dinner.

Moments with Matthew are always incredible, intense, and full of love. Even without realizing it, he manages to turn all my anxiety into peace.

Every time we share pleasure together, it’s magical—it renews my strength and our love. Even when the sex isn’t as intense as this one, it’s always wonderful, full of affection, and with him... everything feels extraordinary and indescribable.

(...)

We sat at the table with my mom and Emma. Matthew began to serve himself, while I just watched, struggling with my stomach that already began to churn just watching him eat.

“Aren’t you going to serve yourself, Elizabeth?” my mom asked, eyeing me.

“I will, Mom,” I stood up. “But today I’ll just have some toast and black coffee,” I said seriously. I went to the kitchen, got the toast and coffee, then returned to the table and sat down.

“That’s all you’re eating, babe? You’ve barely eaten all day. You need to eat properly, love, I’m a demanding chef,” he said playfully, looking at me.

“Sweetheart, I only made this white sauce lasagna because I know how much you love it. I made it myself, just the way you like it,” my mom said sweetly, looking at me.

“Oh, Mom, maybe next time. I’m on a diet—I need to lose a few pounds before your wedding,” I replied, avoiding the real reason: I was scared of eating and throwing up, because I felt so nauseous.

“I wasn’t going to say anything,” Emma chimed in, “but since you brought it up… yeah, you really do need to lose a few pounds. Even your boobs look bigger.” She looked at me seriously, and I threw a napkin at her.

“Love, you’re beautiful. You’re always beautiful, no matter what. I’m sure you’ll be the most gorgeous woman at the wedding,” Matthew said sweetly, holding my hand, making me smile.

But my mom kept giving me that look—like she knew something, or at least suspected I was hiding something. And I kept trying to hide how nauseous that lasagna was making me feel.

We eventually had dinner, talking about our day. Matthew ended up telling my mom about the surprise he planned for me—something she hadn’t known yet. I hadn’t told her because she’s too anxious; if I had, it would’ve stopped being a surprise in two seconds.

Later we went upstairs, did our usual nighttime routine, and climbed into bed, cuddling until we fell asleep.

(...)

I woke up to the annoying sound of my phone alarm at five in the morning. (It was still set to my clinic routine.) I carefully moved Matthew’s legs off me, slid toward the nightstand, and immediately turned off that damn alarm. Then I wrapped myself around my husband and went right back to sleep.

I woke again around six-thirty. Matthew was still sleeping—so beautiful, so peaceful. I got up quietly not to wake him and headed to the bathroom. I showered, went through my morning routine, then went into the closet to pick out my clothes.

I put on my lingerie and stood in front of the full-length mirror, trying to spot any changes in my body. Honestly, I didn’t see anything different. My body looked the same… but my breasts were definitely swollen.
But maybe we only see what we want to see.
And right now?
I want to see a body with no trace of pregnancy.
I’m still clinging to the hope that those tests were wrong.