Chapter 184 Jaxon's consent
Ryder's POV
"But," Jaxon continued, and I held my breath waiting for what came next. "Sage, you don't need my permission to be with Ryder. You don't need anyone's permission. You're a grown woman and you get to choose your own life. You get to decide who you love and who you want to be with. That is yours. It has always been yours and I should have said that a long time ago."
"Really?" Sage's voice was hopeful but cautious, like she was afraid to believe what she was hearing in case it changed before she could hold onto it.
"Really," Jaxon confirmed, and his voice was stronger now, more settled. Like he had made his peace with it somewhere in the quiet of the last few weeks and was only now getting to say it out loud. "If you choose Ryder, that's your decision and I will respect it. I won't try to talk you out of it or make you feel guilty or use my position as your brother to manipulate your choice."
I started to feel the relief building but I held it back, because with Jaxon there was always something else coming and I needed to be standing steady for whatever it was.
"But I have one condition," Jaxon said, and his eyes went hard when they moved to mine. He didn't look angry though, just very serious as if he was discussing a very important business deal. "Not for Sage. This condition is for you, Ryder."
I knew it! I said in my mind. There was going to be a condition.
"Anything," I said immediately, and I meant it with all seriousness too.
"You better treat her right." His voice was quiet but there was nothing soft about it. "Brotherhood be damned, if you hurt her again the way you did when you went silent on her, I will make you regret it for the rest of your life. I'll make sure to deal with you personally. I don't care that you're my best friend. I don't care that we've known each other for years and been through things together that nobody else on this earth knows about. I don't care about politics or brotherhood loyalty or any of it. If you abandon her, if you fail her, if you make her feel the way she felt in that waiting room, we are done. There is no version of that I forgive."
"I understand," I said, holding his gaze and not blinking.
"Do you?" Jaxon leaned forward slightly in his bed, wincing at the movement but not stopping. "Because I'm not talking about club consequences or brotherhood politics or any of that surface level bullshit. I'm talking about me, personally, making sure you understand what it means to hurt someone I love. She is the only family I have left. Do you understand that?"
"I do," I said. "And I promise you I will spend the rest of my life making sure Sage is happy. I will never abandon her again. I will never let her feel like she is not my priority or like she does not matter to every decision I make. I will show up every single day and I will keep showing up and I will prove to both of you that I mean what I say."
"Good answer," Jaxon said. "But words are cheap, Ryder. Talk is easy. Men in this life have been making promises with their mouths for generations and breaking them with their behaviour. I need to see you actually do it. Every day. Not just today in this hospital room with me watching."
"You will," I said, and there was nothing I could add to that that would carry more weight than simply following through on it. "I know what I did. I know what it cost her. I know what it cost you. And I know I have a long way to go before either of you have a reason to trust me fully again. But I love Sage and I am not going anywhere. I will spend however long it takes showing you that these are not empty words."
Jaxon studied my face for a long while, looking for cracks beneath the surface of what I was saying. I guess he believed me because he nodded slowly, just once, and settled back against his pillow.
"Sage," he said, looking at his sister again. "Are you sure about this? Are you really sure this time? Because once you commit to this, once you choose him, you are going to have to live with that choice and everything that comes with it. The good parts and the hard parts both."
"I'm sure," Sage said. She didn't even hesitae for one second before responding. "I've never been more sure about anything in my entire life."
"And you understand that he might mess up again?" Jaxon pressed. "That being in a relationship with a person means dealing with their mistakes and their flaws and the times when they get it wrong? That choosing him does not come with a guarantee of a perfect outcome?"
"I understand," Sage said. "But I choose him anyway. Flaws and all. Mistakes and all. Because I love him and I want to build a life with him and that is worth more to me than any guarantee."
Jaxon looked between the two of us one more time. I watched him come to some internal decision, watched something in his expression settle and release, like a man putting down something he had been carrying for a long time and deciding he was done carrying it.
"Okay," he said finally. "Then I support your choice. Not because I'm giving you permission, because that was never mine to give. But because I respect your right to make your own decisions about your life. And because you are my sister and I want you to be happy. If Ryder is what makes you happy then I am going to have to find a way to live with the image of him holding your hand."
The relief was overwhelming. My chest felt like something had finally loosened inside it after weeks of being wound too tight.
Jaxon extended his hand toward me. I shook it and felt the strength in his grip, more than I expected from a man who had spent weeks in a hospital bed.
But he did not let go after the handshake. Instead, he carefully pulled me into a hug.